coaching: 11
I noticed that did something for myself when I went into overwhelm Wednesday. I sent an e-mail to my coach and got an appointment for yesterday -- that was the earlyist she was available. Reaching out for support, that's a new trick for me.
The business of coaching is predicated on the idea that we are more powerful when we don't operate as an island. At the same time, in co-active coaching, we hold the client as "naturally creative, resourceful, and whole." That is, that the answers are in the client not in the coach.
So yesterday was a big coaching day. I had two clients and I got coached as well.
Client B came by at 7:45 in the morning. He is part of my target clients, the group I think I can make a living serving, a silicon valley engineering leader. He is successful, but interestingly has lost interest in his career and so the coaching turns out to be about relationship and community service. I expect I'll be saying this a lot, but coaching is like always unexpected, that is the clients never seem to fit into the box of our preconceived notions. Like many engineering types he is analytical, and the coaching challenge is to get him stop making interesting self-observations that lead us astray, and keep him focused on what he can do to serve his life. Actually, I don't know yet where to settle on this, talking about one's life is valuable all by itself -- especially so if it is into a safe place that is holding your life's agenda. I guess this is part of trusting the client to shape the dialog and where we go. It requires what we call in co-active coaching a "designed alliance." As the coach I need to keep redesigning that alliance.
But coaching is not just listening. It is about moving the agenda forward. We did that with client B, I'm just not sure how far. Again, this needs to be where I need to trust me and the client and constantly check in. So he left with some specific action items connected to the discussion, so that's a check+.
I notice that the reason I'm writing is to start to look at this question of how to hold the client. What I know in my soul is that great coaching is egoless and completely present in the moment. Its not about me, and yet I'm there in the joy of the clients struggle.
I also saw client K yesterday. He's another engineer, but unlike the A he has not become a manager. Instead he is kind of at the end of his career and doesn't need to work, but still wants to do something with his background. In some sense he feels he never met his potential. His never had permission to just have fun with his life, he is very committed to the practical. I wonder if this will be a common theme with engineers? The problem with K is to move him into a vision for the rest of his life. We wound up brain storming a bit about the kinds of products he might work on -- this kind of brain storming is a fairly constant S.V. exercise. I enjoy it, but its not necessarily coaching, but in this case I think it was important to create new possibility.
Good for now.
The business of coaching is predicated on the idea that we are more powerful when we don't operate as an island. At the same time, in co-active coaching, we hold the client as "naturally creative, resourceful, and whole." That is, that the answers are in the client not in the coach.
So yesterday was a big coaching day. I had two clients and I got coached as well.
Client B came by at 7:45 in the morning. He is part of my target clients, the group I think I can make a living serving, a silicon valley engineering leader. He is successful, but interestingly has lost interest in his career and so the coaching turns out to be about relationship and community service. I expect I'll be saying this a lot, but coaching is like always unexpected, that is the clients never seem to fit into the box of our preconceived notions. Like many engineering types he is analytical, and the coaching challenge is to get him stop making interesting self-observations that lead us astray, and keep him focused on what he can do to serve his life. Actually, I don't know yet where to settle on this, talking about one's life is valuable all by itself -- especially so if it is into a safe place that is holding your life's agenda. I guess this is part of trusting the client to shape the dialog and where we go. It requires what we call in co-active coaching a "designed alliance." As the coach I need to keep redesigning that alliance.
But coaching is not just listening. It is about moving the agenda forward. We did that with client B, I'm just not sure how far. Again, this needs to be where I need to trust me and the client and constantly check in. So he left with some specific action items connected to the discussion, so that's a check+.
I notice that the reason I'm writing is to start to look at this question of how to hold the client. What I know in my soul is that great coaching is egoless and completely present in the moment. Its not about me, and yet I'm there in the joy of the clients struggle.
I also saw client K yesterday. He's another engineer, but unlike the A he has not become a manager. Instead he is kind of at the end of his career and doesn't need to work, but still wants to do something with his background. In some sense he feels he never met his potential. His never had permission to just have fun with his life, he is very committed to the practical. I wonder if this will be a common theme with engineers? The problem with K is to move him into a vision for the rest of his life. We wound up brain storming a bit about the kinds of products he might work on -- this kind of brain storming is a fairly constant S.V. exercise. I enjoy it, but its not necessarily coaching, but in this case I think it was important to create new possibility.
Good for now.