wimp bully
One of the men on my list asks, were we also bullies? Yes, more than a few times.
Kids are mean, and we were meaner back then than the kids now. (Caveat, I only speak from a limited cultural experience.) I know we did, especially in our group think, many mean things.
When I was a kid, maybe eleven, our cousin of six came out from the East Cost to live with us for the summer. He was terrified of planes flying overhead. With group assent I held him outside while he screamed in terror. We were motivated in some belief that it would help him get over it. He did get over it, but not that summer.
This were another time that I clearly acted the bully, but I can't remember with anywhere near the clarity that I remember my post from last night. Maybe because there is less personal trauma it does not stick as clearly -- there is also the 45 years to consider. This must have near the same time as my last post, but it might have been a year before in third grade. I had been slighted by some boy, how I no longer remember. A couple of friends insisted that I could not stand for it. One of the boys knew how the offender went home and it was decided that we should ambush him on the way home, pound him, and make him apologize. It occurs to me that we might have seen something similar in a movie and been so inspired. That afternoon we hurried out of school immediately after the day's final bell and ran the two blocks to the designated ambush location. Honestly, I don't think I would have gone this far without the encouragement of my so called friends; I suspect part of this behavior was to secure my inclusion in their click. I suspect this because I was bigger than the boy and could easily handle him without their support. As the boy walked up we rounded the corner like the gangsters we wanted to be. ... and this is where memory fails.
In the end I did nothing to him other than intimidation. He stopped and said something like "I wondered what you were doing around here." Apparently we had not been as stealth as we imagined. I demanded something of him, which I think he refused. He and I conversed. I think the intent was to embarrass him in someway that he had embarrassed me, but that part -- perhaps because of some shame -- eludes my weak memory. As we talked I think at some level I realized that I had more respect for him the the two buds that were still egging me on to pound him. In the end he was let off with a stern waring -- we know where you live -- to never do it again. He never did it again.
My failure to exact revenge I think lost me inclusion in the click. It is interesting to me that I don't remember any of the names of these three boys.
Kids are mean, and we were meaner back then than the kids now. (Caveat, I only speak from a limited cultural experience.) I know we did, especially in our group think, many mean things.
When I was a kid, maybe eleven, our cousin of six came out from the East Cost to live with us for the summer. He was terrified of planes flying overhead. With group assent I held him outside while he screamed in terror. We were motivated in some belief that it would help him get over it. He did get over it, but not that summer.
This were another time that I clearly acted the bully, but I can't remember with anywhere near the clarity that I remember my post from last night. Maybe because there is less personal trauma it does not stick as clearly -- there is also the 45 years to consider. This must have near the same time as my last post, but it might have been a year before in third grade. I had been slighted by some boy, how I no longer remember. A couple of friends insisted that I could not stand for it. One of the boys knew how the offender went home and it was decided that we should ambush him on the way home, pound him, and make him apologize. It occurs to me that we might have seen something similar in a movie and been so inspired. That afternoon we hurried out of school immediately after the day's final bell and ran the two blocks to the designated ambush location. Honestly, I don't think I would have gone this far without the encouragement of my so called friends; I suspect part of this behavior was to secure my inclusion in their click. I suspect this because I was bigger than the boy and could easily handle him without their support. As the boy walked up we rounded the corner like the gangsters we wanted to be. ... and this is where memory fails.
In the end I did nothing to him other than intimidation. He stopped and said something like "I wondered what you were doing around here." Apparently we had not been as stealth as we imagined. I demanded something of him, which I think he refused. He and I conversed. I think the intent was to embarrass him in someway that he had embarrassed me, but that part -- perhaps because of some shame -- eludes my weak memory. As we talked I think at some level I realized that I had more respect for him the the two buds that were still egging me on to pound him. In the end he was let off with a stern waring -- we know where you live -- to never do it again. He never did it again.
My failure to exact revenge I think lost me inclusion in the click. It is interesting to me that I don't remember any of the names of these three boys.