Desheret (Merry Christmas MrsQuizzical! )

[redsiodaslair]

Some of the fics that I have written are ready to be posted, so I decided to post two, maybe three of them before Christmas.

Title: Desheret
Rating: R
Characters: The ghost of an Egyptian witch, Bill, Charlie
Warnings: Erotic themes
Summary: The time has come. It has been a hundred or three hundred years I have waited for a son to take. This chamber

Comments

[shiiki]

*fans self*

Oh my goodness, Red. Where to start with a review that will do this justice?

You crafted the beginning so well, steeping the story from the start in Anat's mystical, erotic, powerful past. You didn't just tell a story about an adventure in Egypt, you brought it to life right from the start, thousands of years ago.

We of course know that Bill is going to be special, but you take it one step further to show us his strength, his intelligence, and his dedication. I could just feel the heat and sweat from his toil as he spent the weeks with Anat, figuring things out.

And Anat's confidence that she had Bill! Oh, you've used such a very powerful narrative voice with her. Very, very effective. Seeing Bill, and then Charlie, through her eyes was amazing.

I was going through the story, knowing that Bill would get out all right, but when he touched her ... I truly worried then, and suddenly wondered if the whole thing was going to go AU, and have Anat claim Bill for her own. That's just how powerful your writing is, to throw out my firm belief in the safe ending for the brothers and make me grit my teeth in anxiety for them.

Well done, dear!

[redsiodaslair]

Oh dear - you are so kind! Creating an OC is always a risk, but I wanted to tell Bill's feat from an original point of view, one that could show his character from an outer point of view. Her voice was also a challenge, and your comment makes me think that I did something right in that.

The idea of Bill in Egypt, trying to find treasures and attempting to outwit magic that had thousands of years was definitely too appealing for me to pass. I'm thrilled you enjoyed it!