Long
Last night i had a dream, and by last nignt i really mean this morning, where i was dead and i was talking to a bunch of other people who were dead. The thing i remember noting was how, when you asked them how they died, they all told this really interesting story that had no end. Like, "Well, I was walking out of a coffee shop, I remember thinking i had forgot something in the shop, I walk throught the door, I feel something cold on my neck, and that's the last thing i remember." Or, this really long spy caper that ends, "and then something bit my leg and that's all i really remember. I never found out what happened to Dr. Goldman or Octopussy." Lame
This is a song written by a Jackass named Bobby Gaylor.
It's kind of long, so read it if you like
I hated everything on the 'do kill yourself' list, and i hated everything on the 'don't kill yourself' list. I'll miss running over toads with my lawnmower? What a creep. I'll miss masturbation? Yeah, i'll try. Miss 'the experience and pleasure of Hallucinogenics'? Give me a break.
I'll miss "Watching your favorite team sweep the series" about as much as i'll miss fried apple toast. Which is another thing he forgot to put on the "don't kill yourself" list.
Does that mean I should kill myself, then?
What's worse is that was a song he wrote to soothe a suicidal friend.
There's another song by the same jackass, it's called "Business End of a Gun".
I'll spare you the details, but let's just say he was almost killed and he 'took something away form the experience'.
An inderect and yet surprisingly accurate quote:
When it comes to be your turn it won't matter if you were a vegeterian or if you worked out 10 hours a day or if you ate red meat or if you didn't eat red meat, or if you killed animals or if you clubbed baby seals - none of that matters now, you're dead. So fuck it. If you don't want to go to the gym today, don't go. If you wanna eat a big mac, go ahead - eat two of the goddamn things! Cause none of it's gonna matter when you're dead.
What a fuckin idiot. His point is, we are all gonna die anytime, so let's throw away morals and values.
Here's a better point. We are all gonna die anytime, so let's make the most of our lives by living them as who we want to be. Let's value the lives of other creatures. Because the reason we are all not clubbing baby seals right now is because we thought that would give us a longer life, OOPS WE WERE WRONG!
What does this guy think, that life is worth living even if you have to scamper around on your hands and knees in order to do it? There is nothing worth not doing? There is nothing worth dying for?
He contradicts himself in his first song by saying that it is a good idea to kill yourself, which it sometimes is, but you are an idiot if you do, because you have such great things like roller coasters and masturbation to look foreward to here on earth.
In his second song, he implies that we should all be running naked through the streets right now, because we are all held back by our fear of death and he has been charged with the sacred quest of liberating us from our petty, frightened existences.
So let's all do what we want! Let's club baby seals, let's rape the next person we think is attractive, let's go on a hallucinigenic induced fuck and kill spree because we are only gonna live once, and we might as well make the best of our tiny little insignificant lives!
Quote of the Day:
"If you'd been kidnapped by your makes-Royal-Tenemabaum-seem-a-saint father and carried off to Nigeria to join the peace corps and told your mother was dead, which you thought was the case for 20 years, you'd probably some psychosis to work through, or not in my mom's case. Either way, I dont' blame her for it. All I know is I've got my own little morbid death-fascination streak and a grandfather I've never talked to who has 7 Ph.D's and enough children to start his own baseball team; a football team if you count the bastards."
--Some guy
Alternate Quote of the Day:
"right now your low self esteem is really just good common sense"
--Same guy
Actually this guy is pretty fuckin funny, if you want to read the whole thing, click here.
This is a song written by a Jackass named Bobby Gaylor.
It's kind of long, so read it if you like
I hated everything on the 'do kill yourself' list, and i hated everything on the 'don't kill yourself' list. I'll miss running over toads with my lawnmower? What a creep. I'll miss masturbation? Yeah, i'll try. Miss 'the experience and pleasure of Hallucinogenics'? Give me a break.
I'll miss "Watching your favorite team sweep the series" about as much as i'll miss fried apple toast. Which is another thing he forgot to put on the "don't kill yourself" list.
Does that mean I should kill myself, then?
What's worse is that was a song he wrote to soothe a suicidal friend.
There's another song by the same jackass, it's called "Business End of a Gun".
I'll spare you the details, but let's just say he was almost killed and he 'took something away form the experience'.
An inderect and yet surprisingly accurate quote:
When it comes to be your turn it won't matter if you were a vegeterian or if you worked out 10 hours a day or if you ate red meat or if you didn't eat red meat, or if you killed animals or if you clubbed baby seals - none of that matters now, you're dead. So fuck it. If you don't want to go to the gym today, don't go. If you wanna eat a big mac, go ahead - eat two of the goddamn things! Cause none of it's gonna matter when you're dead.
What a fuckin idiot. His point is, we are all gonna die anytime, so let's throw away morals and values.
Here's a better point. We are all gonna die anytime, so let's make the most of our lives by living them as who we want to be. Let's value the lives of other creatures. Because the reason we are all not clubbing baby seals right now is because we thought that would give us a longer life, OOPS WE WERE WRONG!
What does this guy think, that life is worth living even if you have to scamper around on your hands and knees in order to do it? There is nothing worth not doing? There is nothing worth dying for?
He contradicts himself in his first song by saying that it is a good idea to kill yourself, which it sometimes is, but you are an idiot if you do, because you have such great things like roller coasters and masturbation to look foreward to here on earth.
In his second song, he implies that we should all be running naked through the streets right now, because we are all held back by our fear of death and he has been charged with the sacred quest of liberating us from our petty, frightened existences.
So let's all do what we want! Let's club baby seals, let's rape the next person we think is attractive, let's go on a hallucinigenic induced fuck and kill spree because we are only gonna live once, and we might as well make the best of our tiny little insignificant lives!
Quote of the Day:
"If you'd been kidnapped by your makes-Royal-Tenemabaum-seem-a-saint father and carried off to Nigeria to join the peace corps and told your mother was dead, which you thought was the case for 20 years, you'd probably some psychosis to work through, or not in my mom's case. Either way, I dont' blame her for it. All I know is I've got my own little morbid death-fascination streak and a grandfather I've never talked to who has 7 Ph.D's and enough children to start his own baseball team; a football team if you count the bastards."
--Some guy
Alternate Quote of the Day:
"right now your low self esteem is really just good common sense"
--Same guy
Actually this guy is pretty fuckin funny, if you want to read the whole thing, click here.