Because I am.
I'm really pissed off.
Let me start with some background. I was doing some research on one of the meds I take for my bipolar. I found out that it's the reason I need 10-12 hours of sleep, can't seem to lose weight, have joint pain and possibly... sexual side effects.... whatever that means. So I went to my doctor and said take me off this stuff! The doctor gave me a new pill, Geodon.... a lesser form of the Pokemon Geodude.... anyways I took it and I've felt all sorts of weird.... so this could be a little bit more med related than actual anger.
So I'm really pissed off. I'm sick of taking shit from people. I'm sick of expecting things to happen. I'm sick of broken promises. I'm sick of fake 'I love you's'. I'm sick of trusting people. I'm sick of waiting and wanting and not getting! Fuck this, fuck all this shit. I don't need it and I'm not taking it anymore.
I'm nice. I really doubt you can find someone who says I'm not nice. I genuinely care about people and try to be a *good* person.
Why in the world do I let people walk all over me? What am I afraid of? That'll I'll never find anything better? That I deserve to be treated poorly because of whatever sins I might have done in the past? I don't know but I'm done. I'm done with hurt feelings and crying. I'm done with reaching out and getting hurt, again. I'm DONE! I'm sick of compromising my life for someone who doesn't give a shit about my feelings.
What do I want? Someone to love me and care about me. That doesn't sound so hard. I miss people. I miss being around people. I've been so busy I haven't had time for people. When did this happen? When did my circle of friends shrink so drastically? It's not like that can't change again. I want to go out. I want to be around people and actually -hang out-... I can't really remember the last time I just hung out with a group of people. I've spent time with my roommates a fair bit recently and I adore them. <3
This, as all things, will get better.
I have great hope for my future. I look forward to all the wonderful people I will meet and experiences I will have.
Let me start with some background. I was doing some research on one of the meds I take for my bipolar. I found out that it's the reason I need 10-12 hours of sleep, can't seem to lose weight, have joint pain and possibly... sexual side effects.... whatever that means. So I went to my doctor and said take me off this stuff! The doctor gave me a new pill, Geodon.... a lesser form of the Pokemon Geodude.... anyways I took it and I've felt all sorts of weird.... so this could be a little bit more med related than actual anger.
So I'm really pissed off. I'm sick of taking shit from people. I'm sick of expecting things to happen. I'm sick of broken promises. I'm sick of fake 'I love you's'. I'm sick of trusting people. I'm sick of waiting and wanting and not getting! Fuck this, fuck all this shit. I don't need it and I'm not taking it anymore.
I'm nice. I really doubt you can find someone who says I'm not nice. I genuinely care about people and try to be a *good* person.
Why in the world do I let people walk all over me? What am I afraid of? That'll I'll never find anything better? That I deserve to be treated poorly because of whatever sins I might have done in the past? I don't know but I'm done. I'm done with hurt feelings and crying. I'm done with reaching out and getting hurt, again. I'm DONE! I'm sick of compromising my life for someone who doesn't give a shit about my feelings.
What do I want? Someone to love me and care about me. That doesn't sound so hard. I miss people. I miss being around people. I've been so busy I haven't had time for people. When did this happen? When did my circle of friends shrink so drastically? It's not like that can't change again. I want to go out. I want to be around people and actually -hang out-... I can't really remember the last time I just hung out with a group of people. I've spent time with my roommates a fair bit recently and I adore them. <3
This, as all things, will get better.
I have great hope for my future. I look forward to all the wonderful people I will meet and experiences I will have.