(no subject)
This isn't the shortest or best composed of entries, but I wanted to type as much as I could before more bits and parts of the beautiful experience got lost somewhere in my mind, never to reach a conscious level again. I just got up from a 6 hour sleep since coming home from the most emotionally satisfying, powerful experience of my life, up until this point.
Shortly after 12:30 a.m. I received a telephone call from Isa. He said that Clara's contractions were every 3 and 1/2 minutes and since it takes about an hour to get there I could come now. Last night, I went to the soccer game we always go to if Isa is playing since it is in our city after all, right around the corner, and Clara drove all the way up even though she was experiencing "strong menstrual cramp" sensations. She looked as usual, her big-bellied beauty self, calm and as composed as ever. She said she thought she was in early labor stages, which started that morning. We always had our weekly pregnancy club meets at this soccer game (pregnancy club = just the two of us gabbing about our pregnancies, babies, families, birth, etc.). It was so fitting that I would see her first pregnant there, and then for her to actually be starting labor there, like the purpose of those meet-ups had been fulfilled.
I got home and about two hours later Isa called and I immediately started pacing back and forth like I see excited fathers do who do not know what to do with themselves (I did a lot of this throughout her labor when I didn't have water/juice to give her, room to rub her, pillows to move for her, or a watch to time her contractions).
When I got there I heard a moaning Clara who was in a different stage than when I had previously seen her a few hours earlier. Her active labor started around 12 a.m. Isa called the midwife telling her to come, etc., and then the midwife spoke with Marcia (Clara's mother, who was a doula for several years) who told her it was way too early and for the midwife to get some sleep.
The contractions were strong enough to not let Clara-Bear sleep, although she was so tired from her typical 9 p.m. pregnancy sleep routine. She fell asleep in between the contractions, but not long enough breaks and she just kept saying she was so sleepy. The contractions were never consistent. I would know as I was on clock duty most of the night. It helped the time go by quickly for me. Once I was assigned a job I was so focused. I felt so honored to be in such an intimate setting, and just wanted to be there for her the best I could. All the reading and studying I have done, has been geared towards being the one in labor, and although I saw helpful things people could do I knew everyone was different in what they wanted during the experience (even to their own surprise). Clara did not know what she wanted. Clara lost her modesty right away, and I mean before I even came over. Her father was there and she was just walking about naked and I remember her first seeing me there. She still had a smile on her face in that hallway, and she waved right before having another contraction come on. She labored everywhere in that section of the house-bed, floor, hallway, bookcase, living room, bathroom, etc.
Throughout the labor of course I was mentally taking note of certain things, bits of wisdom to take with me to my own labor. Then I laughed thinking how everything I heard, read, saw, felt, and all other notions I will have about my labor will be out the window when the time actually comes. Well, excepting that I know its different to experience it firsthand than witness it, and I know I may not know what I want when that time comes.
It is so amazing what our bodies are doing, even if we cannot see it from the outside. After hours of inconsistent contractions and no time progressions, I still knew her body was doing all this work internally. For a long time I was even timing contractions ALL WRONG. Haha. We didn't let Clara know we were still a bit off from delivery to not dishearten her in any way.
Then there got to a point, which later I confirmed was the transition period. I was comparing yet again everything to what I have read; I couldn't help it. It kept me from going so stir crazy when everyone else was doing the jobs there were to do. Her contractions were on top of each other, no rest from pain and that is when I saw her reach a new plane. This is the part where she looked so exhausted and unrecognizable. I wanted to help her, but didn't know what more to do, as I really couldn't take the pain away. Her husband and mom were great, and of course they even needed a break. The only person she snapped at was rightfully Isa, although I would have certainly not minded her snapping at me, in fact, I expected her to, but she never did. She handled her labor so amazingly graceful; she was so brave and strong. She was good at releasing tension after tiny reminders here and there, and she was just so determined. She did just as her body told her to do, and she did it well. She faced her pain head on and did her best to relax through the sensations.
Right when the midwife was around the corner, Clara did her first push. It was great timing. We had already set up the pool. They had the video camera set up for the water birth. Her dad filmed, I had a camera, and Isa's mom had a camera. She pushed for about an hour. The pushing in the water was my favorite portion of the labor, aside from the actual birth itself, because I saw Clara's personality come back. Transition is the scariest part from what I understand of labor from other people because the body changing what it is doing. To see her after that was a lot better, but she had on her classic big-eyed expression. She didn't speak much for a long time before this point, so it was refreshing to hear her voice in sentences. Even though they were references to pain, she finally got to touch the baby's head and she said, "Isa, I just touched the baby's head!" in such a way that sounded like she didn't know she really had a baby inside her all along, that a baby would actually really come out at the end of this long journey and process. We couldn't see the baby until the midwife asked her to turn over. Clara didn't like the idea but said she would do it because the midwife reasoned with her. The baby was pushing up towards her clitoris, and gravity may help with taking some of the pressure away from there. At every stage, Clara could be reasoned with, so I was not surprised when she complied.
Everyone was so excited to see the dark patch of hair. I was already fighting back tears. Typically I am sure I would have as well, because it is an emotional experience, but add on the hormones I have now and man it was just so hard to hold off exploding in tears so I wouldn't miss the baby coming out. When the baby's head came out she kept pushing until the baby came fully out. The midwife swept the baby up and into a blanket right into Clara's arms. It was funny because we didn't know the sex for a little while, it was like, OH YEA, is it a girl or boy?
They have a beautiful daughter, Isabella. Born at 11:04 a.m., on November 7th, 8 lbs, 9 oz (and Clara was 10 days early, mind you!). When I held her she was so calm and peaceful. She felt so HEAVY, and I thought about how big my little one may get, and that Clara was carrying so much weight inside her.
Not once did she say she could not do it, because she knew she could. There was so much love in that experience...and you know Isa just lost it when then baby came out.
I want that much love in my experience.
Shortly after 12:30 a.m. I received a telephone call from Isa. He said that Clara's contractions were every 3 and 1/2 minutes and since it takes about an hour to get there I could come now. Last night, I went to the soccer game we always go to if Isa is playing since it is in our city after all, right around the corner, and Clara drove all the way up even though she was experiencing "strong menstrual cramp" sensations. She looked as usual, her big-bellied beauty self, calm and as composed as ever. She said she thought she was in early labor stages, which started that morning. We always had our weekly pregnancy club meets at this soccer game (pregnancy club = just the two of us gabbing about our pregnancies, babies, families, birth, etc.). It was so fitting that I would see her first pregnant there, and then for her to actually be starting labor there, like the purpose of those meet-ups had been fulfilled.
I got home and about two hours later Isa called and I immediately started pacing back and forth like I see excited fathers do who do not know what to do with themselves (I did a lot of this throughout her labor when I didn't have water/juice to give her, room to rub her, pillows to move for her, or a watch to time her contractions).
When I got there I heard a moaning Clara who was in a different stage than when I had previously seen her a few hours earlier. Her active labor started around 12 a.m. Isa called the midwife telling her to come, etc., and then the midwife spoke with Marcia (Clara's mother, who was a doula for several years) who told her it was way too early and for the midwife to get some sleep.
The contractions were strong enough to not let Clara-Bear sleep, although she was so tired from her typical 9 p.m. pregnancy sleep routine. She fell asleep in between the contractions, but not long enough breaks and she just kept saying she was so sleepy. The contractions were never consistent. I would know as I was on clock duty most of the night. It helped the time go by quickly for me. Once I was assigned a job I was so focused. I felt so honored to be in such an intimate setting, and just wanted to be there for her the best I could. All the reading and studying I have done, has been geared towards being the one in labor, and although I saw helpful things people could do I knew everyone was different in what they wanted during the experience (even to their own surprise). Clara did not know what she wanted. Clara lost her modesty right away, and I mean before I even came over. Her father was there and she was just walking about naked and I remember her first seeing me there. She still had a smile on her face in that hallway, and she waved right before having another contraction come on. She labored everywhere in that section of the house-bed, floor, hallway, bookcase, living room, bathroom, etc.
Throughout the labor of course I was mentally taking note of certain things, bits of wisdom to take with me to my own labor. Then I laughed thinking how everything I heard, read, saw, felt, and all other notions I will have about my labor will be out the window when the time actually comes. Well, excepting that I know its different to experience it firsthand than witness it, and I know I may not know what I want when that time comes.
It is so amazing what our bodies are doing, even if we cannot see it from the outside. After hours of inconsistent contractions and no time progressions, I still knew her body was doing all this work internally. For a long time I was even timing contractions ALL WRONG. Haha. We didn't let Clara know we were still a bit off from delivery to not dishearten her in any way.
Then there got to a point, which later I confirmed was the transition period. I was comparing yet again everything to what I have read; I couldn't help it. It kept me from going so stir crazy when everyone else was doing the jobs there were to do. Her contractions were on top of each other, no rest from pain and that is when I saw her reach a new plane. This is the part where she looked so exhausted and unrecognizable. I wanted to help her, but didn't know what more to do, as I really couldn't take the pain away. Her husband and mom were great, and of course they even needed a break. The only person she snapped at was rightfully Isa, although I would have certainly not minded her snapping at me, in fact, I expected her to, but she never did. She handled her labor so amazingly graceful; she was so brave and strong. She was good at releasing tension after tiny reminders here and there, and she was just so determined. She did just as her body told her to do, and she did it well. She faced her pain head on and did her best to relax through the sensations.
Right when the midwife was around the corner, Clara did her first push. It was great timing. We had already set up the pool. They had the video camera set up for the water birth. Her dad filmed, I had a camera, and Isa's mom had a camera. She pushed for about an hour. The pushing in the water was my favorite portion of the labor, aside from the actual birth itself, because I saw Clara's personality come back. Transition is the scariest part from what I understand of labor from other people because the body changing what it is doing. To see her after that was a lot better, but she had on her classic big-eyed expression. She didn't speak much for a long time before this point, so it was refreshing to hear her voice in sentences. Even though they were references to pain, she finally got to touch the baby's head and she said, "Isa, I just touched the baby's head!" in such a way that sounded like she didn't know she really had a baby inside her all along, that a baby would actually really come out at the end of this long journey and process. We couldn't see the baby until the midwife asked her to turn over. Clara didn't like the idea but said she would do it because the midwife reasoned with her. The baby was pushing up towards her clitoris, and gravity may help with taking some of the pressure away from there. At every stage, Clara could be reasoned with, so I was not surprised when she complied.
Everyone was so excited to see the dark patch of hair. I was already fighting back tears. Typically I am sure I would have as well, because it is an emotional experience, but add on the hormones I have now and man it was just so hard to hold off exploding in tears so I wouldn't miss the baby coming out. When the baby's head came out she kept pushing until the baby came fully out. The midwife swept the baby up and into a blanket right into Clara's arms. It was funny because we didn't know the sex for a little while, it was like, OH YEA, is it a girl or boy?
They have a beautiful daughter, Isabella. Born at 11:04 a.m., on November 7th, 8 lbs, 9 oz (and Clara was 10 days early, mind you!). When I held her she was so calm and peaceful. She felt so HEAVY, and I thought about how big my little one may get, and that Clara was carrying so much weight inside her.
Not once did she say she could not do it, because she knew she could. There was so much love in that experience...and you know Isa just lost it when then baby came out.
I want that much love in my experience.