Clouds Up - Fourteen (14/15)
Disclaimer: ‘Smallville’ and certain characters belong to Miller-Gough et. al. No profit is gained from this writing. Only, hopefully, enjoyment.
It had happened before. Back there. Back there, it seemed that not a week would go by that he didn't--
It happened a lot. He never got used to it, but he gradually came to expect it. And if Lin were there in the room with him, then it was almost a sure thing. They'd had the opportunity. Why wouldn't they have used it?
Why waste the perfect conditions in which to conduct an experiment? Lucas had been there, and so had Lin, and thus the doctors in white coats had had everything they'd needed. It would've been insane not to do it.
This wouldn't be the first time. It hurt, but it was supposed to. That's how he knew what it was. What he would feel was beyond just pain, and that told him the truth. He was dying. . . again.
The pain was different this time, though. It was different than it was supposed to be, or at least different than he'd believed it should have been. He was here, not Lin.
Not Clark Kent.
Lucas looked at Chloe. He dropped to his knees.
"No!" Chloe screamed. "Lucas! No! You can't just leave him here! Lucas! Lucas!"
It was like the fire was here, rushing through him. It wouldn't leave, though. It didn't go away. The pain never left.
He didn't . . . heal. He wasn't healing. It wasn't getting better.
There was something in his throat, and so Lucas coughed to try and get it out. Blood, he coughed up blood. It filled his mouth and ran past his lips. Chloe was screaming, and Gabriel's motorcycle was running, and Lucas could hear bird song and tree leaves rustling and moving in the wind. He could smell summer, and exhaust, and. . .
Blood. He looked down, and it was like having several pairs of eyes all at once. He looked down and saw blood coming out of himself. He looked down; he will look down; he looks down. Blood from the hole in his chest pulses out. It hurts. It's painful.
He's falling back and when he hits the solid road beneath him, the pain spikes. His chest, his heart, everything hurts and he can't--
Just keep blinking, he thinks. He has to squint against the sunlight overhead, but if he blinks then he's awake. He has to stay awake. If he doesn't, then he'll die. He just has to. . . stay awake. Stay awake.
Keep blinking.
Suddenly there's a rushing sound, and Lucas realizes he can't hear Chloe screaming anymore. The smell and sound of Gabriel's motorcycle is gone, as well. He makes himself blink and then the sunlight's gone and he doesn't have to squint anymore.
"Lucas," he hears. Hands touch him. "No, Lucas. No, hold on. Hold on, you hear me?!"
He hears, but he can't show it. He blinks, blinks, looks up.
He looked up and the sunlight was behind Lin. It cast his face in shadows, but shone as a. . . as a halo around his head.
Lucas blinks and looks up. The sun is behind Lin. He sees it once, twice, again and again, over and over. It's come. This is it.
It's coming true. It's happening.
There's still blood in his mouth and dribbling from the corners of his lips. Lin's face is scared. "Hold on, Lucky," he tells him, orders him. "Just hold on. You hear me? You keep breathing!"
Lin reached down and Lucas felt himself being picked up.
Lin will reach down and Lucas will feel himself being picked up.
Lin reaches down. . . and Lucas feels his brother pick him up.
"Hold on, hold on, hold on. Stay with me, Lucky. Just hold on!"
Rushing, movement. Lin's running. Smoother than a car ride, quicker than a motorcycle, closer than. . .
The wind turns colder, and he can't blink anymore. It hurts to keep his eyes open. Lin's holding him, and they're flying now.
Rushing, movement. It hurts to keep his eyes open.
So he doesn't.
***
"Oh, thank God," he heard Lin say. It was close by and when Lucas opened his eyes, it was to Lin's face hovering mere inches away from his own.
"Yeah," Lucas agreed.
Lin smiled, then moved back. He was standing, and Lucas. . . wasn't. Lucas looked around and then had to blink because all he could make out was white.
White, everywhere.
He was lying down, so the first thing he tried to do was sit up. Lin was back in an instant, frowning at him, but helping nonetheless. With an arm around his back bracing him, Lucas was able to get upright.
It was still overwhelmingly white, but not completely. There were shapes and shades of colors amidst the blankness, and the more he blinked, the more his vision cleared.
It wasn't white. It was ice and snow.
"Where is this?" Lucas finally asked.
"We're in the Arctic," Lin replied. " And this-- this is my fortress, I guess." He gave a little laugh at the end, but Lucas didn't think it sounded all that amused.
"Is it yours from your home?" he asked, and felt Lin's arms twitch around him. Perhaps it'd been a flinch, but Lucas hadn't meant it to be hurtful. "Did you find it or build it?"
Lin went completely still for a moment, and then all at once relaxed. He sighed, but it sounded okay, not angry or upset.
"What happened back there, Lucky?" Lin whispered.
"Back. . . where?"
"In Smallville." He was silent for seven seconds, and then said, "You were shot. In the chest."
Lin sounded angry, but Lucas knew him better than that. Lin was. . . worried.
"Did you help there?" Lucas questioned, and when Lin shifted around a little, he knew the answer. "I'm glad. It's a good town. They shouldn't die."
Lin made a sound in his throat, something like a laugh and wheeze and yet neither, really. Lucas tried to turn around so he could see Lin's face, but was stopped by the hands gripping his arms.
"You should rest," Lin said. "Smallville's safe, not blown up like that idiot wanted. And you're safe up here. Rest, Lucky," he said quietly. Lin slid out from behind him and started gently pushing him back down on. . . whatever they were sitting on.
Lucas went to close his eyes, but felt Lin's hands start to withdraw completely. "NO!" he exclaimed, jerking his eyes back open and grabbing at the closest hand. Lin looked at him, his face frowning and concerned.
"Lucky?" he asked, gently.
"Don't leave. Stay. Please." Lucas felt himself bite his lip and his eyes felt strange. "Lin," he said, and tried to continue, but couldn't. His throat closed up again, only different somehow. His eyes hurt and stung, and he realized he was squeezing Lin's hand extremely tight.
"Please," he repeated, and then tears started running down his face. Lin kept a hold on his hand, but sat down again, too. He pulled Lucas closer, wrapping his arms around him. He hugged him. Lin hugged him.
It had hurt. It hadn't been like any of the other times, not really. Lin hadn't been there when the bullet hit him and passed through. He hadn't been there. But Lin always came for him. When it had really hurt back there, Lin was with him. If it ever really hurt out here, Lucas remembered thinking, Lin would be with him, too.
But he hadn't, and Lucas hadn't been able to feel anything but pain and. . . worry.
It was different, and he'd even seen it. He'd seen that happening two years ago, had known it would happen. And still it had happened.
They would all come true, Lucas realized, all his dreams, in the end. Even the bad ones, the dreams that hurt and made Lucas wish he wouldn't ever fall asleep again just so he didn't have to see them, even those would come true.
Lucas was crying, and Lin was hugging him close. Maybe he was crying, too, because he was shaking just as much as Lucas. Maybe Lin was just as worried, too. Maybe Lin realized what today meant.
Bad things were going to happen, and even though Lucas would see them. . . he wouldn't be able to stop them. He wouldn't be able to save. . . them.
"Lucky," Lin whispered close to his ear, "you're not alone. I'm here. We're here. You're not alone. Lucky, it'll be okay. You're not alone. . . "
He'd died again today. He'd seen himself die and he had. He'd known it would happen, and it had happened.
He'd dreamed something, and even though he'd known it would come true. . . this was the first time it had. This was the first time.
He wasn't crazy. He wasn't making it up. He'd seen it. He had. It was real. It would always be real.
They would all be real.
"I'm glad you're back," Lucas confessed, and Lin squeezed him tighter in response. "I missed you."
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