Political Soapbox....
...brought to you by Utah Phillips (will do a real post soon!)
Mark Twain said "Those of you who are inclined to worry have the widest selection in history." Why complain? Try to do something about it! It's going on 9 months now since I decided that I was gonna declare that I am a candidate for the presidency of the United States. Oh yes, I am going to run.
I shopped around for a party. Well, I looked at the Republicans. Decided talking to a conservative is like talking to your refrigerator. You know, the light goes on, the light goes off; it's not gonna do anything that's not built into it. And I'm not gonna talk to a conservative anymore than I talk to my damn refrigerator. Working for the Democratic party, now, that's kinda like rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.
So I created my own party; it's called the Sloth and Indolence Party. And I am running as an anarchist candidate in the best sense of that word. I have studied the presidency carefully. I have seen that our best presidents were the do-nothing presidents -- Millard Filmore, Warren G Harding. When you have a president who does something, we are all in serious trouble. If he does anything at all, if he gets up at night to go to the bathroom, somehow, mystically, trouble will ensue.
I guarantee that if I am elected, I will take over the White House, hang out, shoot pool, scratch my ass, and not do a damn thing. Which is to say if you want something done, don't come to me to do it for you. You gotta get together and figure out how to do it yourselves. Is that a deal?