You’re Guaranteed To Run This Town 37/?
Title: You’re Guaranteed To Run This Town 37/?
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Adam has the problem that he dates all the wrong guys, and it seems that it’s going to happen all over again when he meets Kris - a young punk who’s really just a softie under all the leather and false confidence.
Warnings: M/M Sex, cussing, descriptions of assault, mentions of non-con sex and trauma from past, mentions of infidelity in past, lots of self-depreciating and self-doubt, lots of bad feelings ahead.
Notes: Yay! Finished in time! And for a moment I thought my Kradam was busted but thankfully it is fixed now! For everyone who's still reading this and sticking with me through my constantly messy scheduled (or not) posting, thank you. Trying to schedule myself for writing has never been a strong suit (obviously) but I am going to try and make up for it. Thank you everyone. :)
Adam sat quietly outside of the room, leaving the family to themselves. He walked Kris into the room - because Kris was just a little too hysterical to really be of much use - and he crumbled apart again as soon as he saw Allison. She was awake now, but there were bruises already coloring her face and arms, her left which was in a cast and she looked like she had trouble breathing.
Kris rushed over to her and hugged her, crying and shaking, and Tommy moved to comfort him, looking so, so angry, and Adam left, then. He... didn't exactly think he'd fit there or be of any use so leaving would leave room for any nursing staff to come in and Kris could stay with his family there.
“Adam?”
Adam stiffened hearing the familiar voice. Oh no, oh no, no, not now. Adam looked up, seeing the familiar man from his past, all dressed in scrubs and a silly grin on his face. Jason smiled and walked over to him; he still looked the same from when Adam was still with Hayden. “I thought it was you, man. It's been a while.”
Adam swallowed and nodded slowly. “Yeah, um, it has.” He felt awkward, and he shifted around in his seat as Jason still watched him.
He paused just for a bit before he spoke up again. “So, uh, what are you doing here? I haven't heard from you since Hayden...” He trailed off when Adam flinched and cleared his throat. “Uh, so, what happened between you two, anyway? Hayden seemed all pissed off about it afterward.”
Adam wondered if he could just get away with trying to blend back into the chair and not have to talk about this, or hide away in the room. But, no, he needed to get past Hayden and everything and everyone connected to him. “He... he cheated on me... again, and then kicked me out.”
Jason went quiet for a while, then Adam heard a beeping noise and the other man let out a breath. “Sorry to hear that, Ad. It was good to see you again and I hope things get better for you.” He reached out for a moment, awkwardly patting Adam on the back before he rushed off.
Adam watched him, feeling himself relax, then grimaced. Am I ever going to get past this? He blinked as he heard light laughter in the room and peered in. He couldn't help smiling when he saw Kris curled up next to Allison's bedside, his head on the cot and the younger girl brushing her fingers soothingly through his short hair. Kris at least looked better now, cheeks stained with tears but dry, and he was smiling softly as he told Alli some story that he could only catch bits and pieces of. All the while, Tommy watched them on Alli's other side, grinning, hand curled lightly over Allison's other hand on her bad arm.
Adam's smile softened a little before he huffed and turned. I have Kris, I'm so much better off than I've ever been, why... The thought trailed off as Kris giggled, high and light, then he felt a familiar hand on his shoulder. He looked up into soft brown eyes and curled, crooked pink lips. “Hey, you going to sit out here the entire time?”
Adam flushed a little bit and shrugged, letting Kris pull him up. Alli's smile brightened when they both walked in, hands entwined, and Adam had a bit of a feeling that he was just starting to become part of their little family, too.
It was a few hours later that Alli was talking with the police. When they'd come into the room she glanced over to Kris, worried, and started answering questions.
“Do you know who the attacker was?”
She hesitated for the first time during the questioning, watching Kris uncertainly, and Adam gripped his hand a little tighter as Tommy brushed his hand up Alli's arm, comfortingly, and she started. “I, yeah... I do...” She took a breath and looked back to the police. “He had blue eyes, dirty blond hair... he was tall and...” She chewed her lip, and Adam got a sinking feeling in his stomach. “And... his name is Spencer...”
Kris went completely white and Tommy looked capable of murder. Adam brushed his hands along Kris' arms, leaning over to whisper to him soothingly, reaching for the cold bottle at his feet just in case. One of the police questioning her nodded, writing in his notepad, then asked. “Do you have a last name?”
“Martin.” Kris said before anyone else could speak. He ran a shaky hand through his hair and let out a breath, nodding. “His... his last name is Martin.”
The police turned to him, and both Alli's and Tommy's expressions shifted into worry. “And how do you know this?”
Kris shuddered, and Adam could see those brown eyes already glazing over. He quickly reached the cold bottle up and pressed it firmly into Kris' hands, pressing his chilled hand to Kris' cheek. It shocked him out of the memories and enough for him to speak again. “I...” He sucked in a deep breath, voice shaking. “I was... a-assaulted by him... before.”
The two police men shared a look before one moved back to Alli. “We'll try to track down your attacker, both of you.” He glanced back to Kris. “Is there anything else he did that someone would like to add?”
Adam watched Kris shake his head and squeezed his hand. I... I want him to tell them but... I don't want him to hurt over it... But, he does need to be arrested for this, for everything. And he's going to, but... he needs to be put in there for life...
It was quiet for a moment, then Tommy spoke up, quiet. “He... he raped Kris, too.” Kris' eyes closed tightly and a few tears rolled down his cheeks. Tommy crossed the room and gently rubbed Kris' shoulder. “It was a long time ago but... he never reported it. He attacked Kris to try and do it again about two months ago.”
“Is this true?” One of the officers asked. Kris shuddered in a breath, only for it to break into a sob and nodded, more tears slipping down his cheeks. Adam brushed them away gently, then leaned his head against Kris' temple, praying silently to him, to give Kris the strength he knew he needed.
There was a beat, then the sound of the notepad tapping shut. “We'll get back to the both of you. When we catch him we'll make sure he gets put away for this for a long, long time.”
Alli muttered a thank you, and the door clicked shut behind the officers. There were a few clicks of silence with only the sound of the machines tracking Alli's vitals, and the tick of the clock on the wall. Then her small, motherly-like voice called out. “Kris? Do you-”
Kris let out a loud breath and shook himself, rubbing the tear-tracks from his face - it didn't do much good given that there were still tears falling - and put on a shaky grin. “I'm fine. I don't really want to talk about it.” He stood up and moved over to Alli, having to hold onto the side of her cot to stay up on his trembling legs. “What about you? Are you-”
“Kris.” Allison scolded and Kris stopped short his face falling. He shook his head and started shivering. He tried to take a deep breath, but then all of his air burst out of him and he fell back against the wall and slipped down to the floor, shuddering and breathing way too fast. Adam was over by him the second that Kris started falling, and Tommy was out of the door, calling for a nurse, and then everything went black for Kris.
When he woke up, Kris was settled in a cot, a nurse watching him warily as she listened for his breaths, breaking into a smile when his eyes fluttered open. When she pulled back and he could actually see the room he was in - which... was less of a room and more of just a cubical of curtains - he saw Caden sitting in the sole chair in the space, standing up when the nurse nodded him over. Oh, great. Exactly what I need after all of that. More poking and prodding.
His head was killing him, and he wasn't sure if that was because of how hard he had to fight the memories when the cops were questioning him or if it was when he hit his head on the wall. He felt like one huge wound, with people sticking their fingers into him and just making the pain and everything so much worse. He... he did want Spencer in jail, especially after what he did to Alli, but... he didn't want to remember so much. It was almost like he was watching the memories play in his mind, that last moment, but he wasn't there, living them. He didn't know which way was worse.
“Hello Kris.” Caden smiled softly, and he didn't have his glasses on this time, or the notebook for his notes. Maybe this wasn't a therapy thing. Maybe the therapist came by just to make sure Kris was alright. Yeah, that's exactly what he's going to do. He's going to measure just how much more broken you are now. Kris flinched, and Caden tapped the cot to get his attention back. “So. I heard what you did today.” That I flipped out completely and broke down like the broken little boy that I am? “It was a very brave thing for you to do.”
Brave? What? I didn't even say most of it. All I told them was about him... attacking me the last time. Tommy said everything else. I just sat there and cried! How is that brave? And Adam. Adam had to help me with everything, too. Kris groaned internally, then paused. Wait, Adam. Where's Adam?
Any thoughts about how weak or frightened he was disappeared and Kris looked around the room, ignoring the whining sound he made when he couldn't find Adam anywhere. “Adam?”
He startled a little at how hoarse his voice was, then Caden clucked his tongue. “He was too restless to stay in here, so the nurse sent him out. She probably went to get him when she left.”
As if on cue, Adam burst through the curtain, staring over at Kris with a gape for a moment before he walked over - it looked like he was forcing himself to take the slow, calm steps he was - and hugged Kris as tightly as he dared. “Baby, oh god, I'm sorry, so sorry.”
The nurse walked in behind him, then, glancing between the two men that made up the couple, she cleared her throat an waited until one of them - Adam - looked up, Kris being too preoccupied clinging to Adam and grounding himself with his presence. “Well, Mister Allen, it seems that you just overloaded from stress, causing you to pass out for a moment there.” Her lips twitched slightly when Adam made a soft noise and pulled Kris to him, kissing his temple, but she tried to hide it by shifting back into her professional attitude from before and cleared her throat. “You did bump your head a little bit, but it's nothing too serious.” She looked up at Kris and waited for him to finally look away from Adam's bright blue eyes to her. “Is there anything that's bothering you physically? Any dizziness or nausea, feeling light-headed?”
Kris nodded slightly and winced when his head throbbed. “Um, I have a killer headache.” He shrugged. “Other than that I feel fine.” And ashamed and weak and small...
The nurse nodded then looked over to Caden. “I'd suggest setting up a meeting to talk with your therapist tomorrow, and today you go home and rest up. Just relax and avoid anything that could trigger you or be stressful at all.”
With that she left the room, and Caden stood up to follow her, looking over at Kris. “I'll find a time to set you up and call you when I figure it out.” He left then, and that left Kris with Adam.
Adam brushed a hand through Kris' hair, his lips soft and warm where they pressed against his temple. “Ready to go now, Kris?”
Kris huffed and nodded. He did want to go back and check in on Alli, but he didn't want to talk about what happened, about... the possibilities of what could be happening. He shivered slightly and clung to Adam, trying to anchor himself again. Be better to just go home anyway. Alli will understand...
He went through the sign-out process sluggishly and he dozed a little in the car on the way back to the apartment, feeling drained from everything. “When we get back I'll give you one of those massages that you like and then I'm completely at your mercy.” Adam grinned as he spoke, and Kris smiled softly right back at him. “Seriously, you're going to be so spoiled tonight.”
Kris let out a happy sigh. “Mmm. Can't wait.” He paused for a yawn and settled deeper into his seat. “Drive faster then before I konk out again, then.”
Adam chuckled softly, before Kris was lightly sleeping again, and he could still hear Adam's soft voice singing to himself as he drove. Adam's voice almost like a knight in blindly shiny armor, so bright and caring and protecting that any dark memories lurking around in his head didn't have the will to even get close to breaking him.
“Mmohmygod...” Kris groaned, melting into Adam's lap and the couch as Adam petted him softly, fingers scratching at his scalp, and his other hand rubbing circles into his stomach. He licked his lips, watching Adam pretty, pretty blue eyes above him. “I need to get hurt more often. This is amazing.”
Adam chuckled and leaned down, kissing him, and despite the awkward angle, it was perfect. “You can have it anytime you want it, baby. Just ask.”
Kris grinned and shifted a little bit. He'd been pampered since he got home, with Adam first massaging away his headache, then moving down his neck, and after slowly peeling away Kris' clothes and worshiping him at Kris' soft demands, Adam spread them out on the couch the way that Adam had them now, and Adam had fed Kris with soft, lingering brushes against his lips and cheeks, and when Kris had had enough Adam went back to brushing his hands over Kris' skin in loving circles, eventually ending up to where he was now.
Kris hummed thoughtfully, as a memory popped into his head. He remembered a quick flicker of his dream of him and Adam, tangled together and Adam almost... I wonder... should I?
Kris bit his lip lightly and opened his eyes to stare up at his love. Adam was watching him, his blue eyes soft and filled with too many emotions for Kris to figure out, and his pink, lovely lips curling just slightly, all put together with freckles that went on forever. I... I don't want it yet but... this feels... right somehow. I can just tell him, at least. “Hey Adam?”
Adam hummed softly, his voice quiet when he spoke. “Yes, Kris?”
Kris' heart sped up for a moment, and he shuddered, before he let out a breath and shot for it. “I, um, I had this... this dream recently.” He looked away when he felt his face heat up. Adam's fingers scratched encouragingly. “We, uh, were... having sex. Like... you, inside me, sex.” Adam's fingers paused and Kris swallowed, but went on. “I mean, it wasn't all nice, it... it wasn't a dream exactly, more a nightmare since it shifted afterward to one of my memories but-” He quickly shot in when those fingers twitched and Adam made a soft sound. “The beginning it was... it was good, nice. So nice, and... and I was... I want to do that.”
Adam made another soft sound, different from the last, a little more... something, but Kris couldn't get himself to stop now that he'd started. “I... I want to feel close to you and... I want to have that connection because, while I've never had that with anyone else, and that I've never actually felt anything right with anyone else. I...” He swallowed. “I know it would with you. I know I could be with you completely and actually... feel proud of myself, and happy and actually... actually enjoy it. And, I just...” He blushed some more and dropped down into a grumble. “I just, thought I should tell you.”
Adam was quiet for a few moments, then he sighed, brushing a hand through Kris' hair. “You know if you... wanted to have that, the closeness and connected thing, I could bottom for you.”
Kris brain went offline for a few seconds. I... never thought of that. I don't know if I... But, even not considering it before, Kris... wanted it. A lot. And it shouldn't trigger me at all, considering. But... Kris chewed on his lip again and he had to take several breaths to try and will away the sudden excitement that hit him like a wall of bricks. “I've... never done that before.” He flushed and looked away. What if I'm horrible? What if I turn him off completely I'm so bad, or... or hurt him? I could fuck it all up and...
Kris' rambling thoughts went on and on, even as Adam tilted his head back and those gentle blue eyes smiled at him. “If you want to do it, I can help you along with the how.”
Kris' heart felt like it grew about ten sizes and he smiled wide, then thought of something else. “What about...” He stopped, then thought of how to phrase it. “Um, I thought... you were more...” He shrugged. “Toppy.”
Adam rolled his eyes at that. “Yeah, well, since you I've taken more to having you in control. Turns me on like crazy. And besides...” He leaned down, rubbing his nose lightly against Kris' in a little eskimo kiss that had Kris between giggling and cooing. “I think we should be more of equals in this, sharing every experience we can equally. And I can wait until you are completely ready to do this. But...” He grinned devilishly and leaned down a fraction more to whisper into Kris' ear. “I've been having a few dreams lately, too. And I cannot wait to have you inside me.”
Kris swallowed, feeling himself burning up all over, then he laughed lightly. “Um, can I take a rain check for now?” Because he was so not ready for this yet. But... he wanted. That want was a burning mix of lust and love and need and so much else that he couldn't describe but there was so much fear and anxiety that he just... he couldn't do it yet. Not yet. But soon. He shuddered at that thought.
Adam chuckled and nodded. “Of course.” He nipped at Kris' ear, and that was not making it any easier for him to hold off on this. “But, for now, if you're feeling up to it, I'd like to take care of this somehow?”
Kris arched up into Adam as he traced the outline of Kris' hard on through his jeans. Kris gulped, and nodded frantically. “Oh, please. Please, please, please.” Adam tilted his head, asking with those expressing eyes what Kris wanted, and Kris swallowed, tracing his fingers along Adam's lips in answer.
Adam grinned, crooked, like he was mimicking Kris' smirk, and he gently lifted Kris up off of his lap, moving them around until Kris was relaxed back into the couch cushions with his legs dangling off the front, and Adam between his legs, and Adam drew his belt out slowly through a ring made with his fingers, almost like foreplay in the easy way he undid Kris' jeans and pulled them down his hips. Then Kris' head dropped back as Adam went to worshiping him, licking his thighs and nipping at the sensitive skin around his cock, and finally, after so much teasing, sucked him down.
Kris closed his eyes as Adam leisurely sucked and licked, and let his mind wander. Not that it wandered very far from the thoughts Adam gave him. Freckled legs around his hips and Adam panting and whining below him.
Needless to say, Kris didn't last very long. And he couldn't help from smiling when Adam pulled him up into his arms and carried him back to the bedroom, and tucked him in. When Kris saw Adam's obvious need when he undressed before he pulled up his sleep pants, Adam just winked, kissed Kris' on the temple and told him he'd take care of it before he padded off to the bathroom and it wasn't very long before Kris could hear Adam crying out - and did that ever add to the lovely thoughts swirling around in his head - and then Adam was curling up against him.
Kris smiled, tucking his face into the space of Adam's neck, made specially for him he thought because he just fit so perfectly, before he drifted off to sleep, the stress and worry of the day long gone from his mind.
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Adam has the problem that he dates all the wrong guys, and it seems that it’s going to happen all over again when he meets Kris - a young punk who’s really just a softie under all the leather and false confidence.
Warnings: M/M Sex, cussing, descriptions of assault, mentions of non-con sex and trauma from past, mentions of infidelity in past, lots of self-depreciating and self-doubt, lots of bad feelings ahead.
Notes: Yay! Finished in time! And for a moment I thought my Kradam was busted but thankfully it is fixed now! For everyone who's still reading this and sticking with me through my constantly messy scheduled (or not) posting, thank you. Trying to schedule myself for writing has never been a strong suit (obviously) but I am going to try and make up for it. Thank you everyone. :)
Adam sat quietly outside of the room, leaving the family to themselves. He walked Kris into the room - because Kris was just a little too hysterical to really be of much use - and he crumbled apart again as soon as he saw Allison. She was awake now, but there were bruises already coloring her face and arms, her left which was in a cast and she looked like she had trouble breathing.
Kris rushed over to her and hugged her, crying and shaking, and Tommy moved to comfort him, looking so, so angry, and Adam left, then. He... didn't exactly think he'd fit there or be of any use so leaving would leave room for any nursing staff to come in and Kris could stay with his family there.
“Adam?”
Adam stiffened hearing the familiar voice. Oh no, oh no, no, not now. Adam looked up, seeing the familiar man from his past, all dressed in scrubs and a silly grin on his face. Jason smiled and walked over to him; he still looked the same from when Adam was still with Hayden. “I thought it was you, man. It's been a while.”
Adam swallowed and nodded slowly. “Yeah, um, it has.” He felt awkward, and he shifted around in his seat as Jason still watched him.
He paused just for a bit before he spoke up again. “So, uh, what are you doing here? I haven't heard from you since Hayden...” He trailed off when Adam flinched and cleared his throat. “Uh, so, what happened between you two, anyway? Hayden seemed all pissed off about it afterward.”
Adam wondered if he could just get away with trying to blend back into the chair and not have to talk about this, or hide away in the room. But, no, he needed to get past Hayden and everything and everyone connected to him. “He... he cheated on me... again, and then kicked me out.”
Jason went quiet for a while, then Adam heard a beeping noise and the other man let out a breath. “Sorry to hear that, Ad. It was good to see you again and I hope things get better for you.” He reached out for a moment, awkwardly patting Adam on the back before he rushed off.
Adam watched him, feeling himself relax, then grimaced. Am I ever going to get past this? He blinked as he heard light laughter in the room and peered in. He couldn't help smiling when he saw Kris curled up next to Allison's bedside, his head on the cot and the younger girl brushing her fingers soothingly through his short hair. Kris at least looked better now, cheeks stained with tears but dry, and he was smiling softly as he told Alli some story that he could only catch bits and pieces of. All the while, Tommy watched them on Alli's other side, grinning, hand curled lightly over Allison's other hand on her bad arm.
Adam's smile softened a little before he huffed and turned. I have Kris, I'm so much better off than I've ever been, why... The thought trailed off as Kris giggled, high and light, then he felt a familiar hand on his shoulder. He looked up into soft brown eyes and curled, crooked pink lips. “Hey, you going to sit out here the entire time?”
Adam flushed a little bit and shrugged, letting Kris pull him up. Alli's smile brightened when they both walked in, hands entwined, and Adam had a bit of a feeling that he was just starting to become part of their little family, too.
It was a few hours later that Alli was talking with the police. When they'd come into the room she glanced over to Kris, worried, and started answering questions.
“Do you know who the attacker was?”
She hesitated for the first time during the questioning, watching Kris uncertainly, and Adam gripped his hand a little tighter as Tommy brushed his hand up Alli's arm, comfortingly, and she started. “I, yeah... I do...” She took a breath and looked back to the police. “He had blue eyes, dirty blond hair... he was tall and...” She chewed her lip, and Adam got a sinking feeling in his stomach. “And... his name is Spencer...”
Kris went completely white and Tommy looked capable of murder. Adam brushed his hands along Kris' arms, leaning over to whisper to him soothingly, reaching for the cold bottle at his feet just in case. One of the police questioning her nodded, writing in his notepad, then asked. “Do you have a last name?”
“Martin.” Kris said before anyone else could speak. He ran a shaky hand through his hair and let out a breath, nodding. “His... his last name is Martin.”
The police turned to him, and both Alli's and Tommy's expressions shifted into worry. “And how do you know this?”
Kris shuddered, and Adam could see those brown eyes already glazing over. He quickly reached the cold bottle up and pressed it firmly into Kris' hands, pressing his chilled hand to Kris' cheek. It shocked him out of the memories and enough for him to speak again. “I...” He sucked in a deep breath, voice shaking. “I was... a-assaulted by him... before.”
The two police men shared a look before one moved back to Alli. “We'll try to track down your attacker, both of you.” He glanced back to Kris. “Is there anything else he did that someone would like to add?”
Adam watched Kris shake his head and squeezed his hand. I... I want him to tell them but... I don't want him to hurt over it... But, he does need to be arrested for this, for everything. And he's going to, but... he needs to be put in there for life...
It was quiet for a moment, then Tommy spoke up, quiet. “He... he raped Kris, too.” Kris' eyes closed tightly and a few tears rolled down his cheeks. Tommy crossed the room and gently rubbed Kris' shoulder. “It was a long time ago but... he never reported it. He attacked Kris to try and do it again about two months ago.”
“Is this true?” One of the officers asked. Kris shuddered in a breath, only for it to break into a sob and nodded, more tears slipping down his cheeks. Adam brushed them away gently, then leaned his head against Kris' temple, praying silently to him, to give Kris the strength he knew he needed.
There was a beat, then the sound of the notepad tapping shut. “We'll get back to the both of you. When we catch him we'll make sure he gets put away for this for a long, long time.”
Alli muttered a thank you, and the door clicked shut behind the officers. There were a few clicks of silence with only the sound of the machines tracking Alli's vitals, and the tick of the clock on the wall. Then her small, motherly-like voice called out. “Kris? Do you-”
Kris let out a loud breath and shook himself, rubbing the tear-tracks from his face - it didn't do much good given that there were still tears falling - and put on a shaky grin. “I'm fine. I don't really want to talk about it.” He stood up and moved over to Alli, having to hold onto the side of her cot to stay up on his trembling legs. “What about you? Are you-”
“Kris.” Allison scolded and Kris stopped short his face falling. He shook his head and started shivering. He tried to take a deep breath, but then all of his air burst out of him and he fell back against the wall and slipped down to the floor, shuddering and breathing way too fast. Adam was over by him the second that Kris started falling, and Tommy was out of the door, calling for a nurse, and then everything went black for Kris.
When he woke up, Kris was settled in a cot, a nurse watching him warily as she listened for his breaths, breaking into a smile when his eyes fluttered open. When she pulled back and he could actually see the room he was in - which... was less of a room and more of just a cubical of curtains - he saw Caden sitting in the sole chair in the space, standing up when the nurse nodded him over. Oh, great. Exactly what I need after all of that. More poking and prodding.
His head was killing him, and he wasn't sure if that was because of how hard he had to fight the memories when the cops were questioning him or if it was when he hit his head on the wall. He felt like one huge wound, with people sticking their fingers into him and just making the pain and everything so much worse. He... he did want Spencer in jail, especially after what he did to Alli, but... he didn't want to remember so much. It was almost like he was watching the memories play in his mind, that last moment, but he wasn't there, living them. He didn't know which way was worse.
“Hello Kris.” Caden smiled softly, and he didn't have his glasses on this time, or the notebook for his notes. Maybe this wasn't a therapy thing. Maybe the therapist came by just to make sure Kris was alright. Yeah, that's exactly what he's going to do. He's going to measure just how much more broken you are now. Kris flinched, and Caden tapped the cot to get his attention back. “So. I heard what you did today.” That I flipped out completely and broke down like the broken little boy that I am? “It was a very brave thing for you to do.”
Brave? What? I didn't even say most of it. All I told them was about him... attacking me the last time. Tommy said everything else. I just sat there and cried! How is that brave? And Adam. Adam had to help me with everything, too. Kris groaned internally, then paused. Wait, Adam. Where's Adam?
Any thoughts about how weak or frightened he was disappeared and Kris looked around the room, ignoring the whining sound he made when he couldn't find Adam anywhere. “Adam?”
He startled a little at how hoarse his voice was, then Caden clucked his tongue. “He was too restless to stay in here, so the nurse sent him out. She probably went to get him when she left.”
As if on cue, Adam burst through the curtain, staring over at Kris with a gape for a moment before he walked over - it looked like he was forcing himself to take the slow, calm steps he was - and hugged Kris as tightly as he dared. “Baby, oh god, I'm sorry, so sorry.”
The nurse walked in behind him, then, glancing between the two men that made up the couple, she cleared her throat an waited until one of them - Adam - looked up, Kris being too preoccupied clinging to Adam and grounding himself with his presence. “Well, Mister Allen, it seems that you just overloaded from stress, causing you to pass out for a moment there.” Her lips twitched slightly when Adam made a soft noise and pulled Kris to him, kissing his temple, but she tried to hide it by shifting back into her professional attitude from before and cleared her throat. “You did bump your head a little bit, but it's nothing too serious.” She looked up at Kris and waited for him to finally look away from Adam's bright blue eyes to her. “Is there anything that's bothering you physically? Any dizziness or nausea, feeling light-headed?”
Kris nodded slightly and winced when his head throbbed. “Um, I have a killer headache.” He shrugged. “Other than that I feel fine.” And ashamed and weak and small...
The nurse nodded then looked over to Caden. “I'd suggest setting up a meeting to talk with your therapist tomorrow, and today you go home and rest up. Just relax and avoid anything that could trigger you or be stressful at all.”
With that she left the room, and Caden stood up to follow her, looking over at Kris. “I'll find a time to set you up and call you when I figure it out.” He left then, and that left Kris with Adam.
Adam brushed a hand through Kris' hair, his lips soft and warm where they pressed against his temple. “Ready to go now, Kris?”
Kris huffed and nodded. He did want to go back and check in on Alli, but he didn't want to talk about what happened, about... the possibilities of what could be happening. He shivered slightly and clung to Adam, trying to anchor himself again. Be better to just go home anyway. Alli will understand...
He went through the sign-out process sluggishly and he dozed a little in the car on the way back to the apartment, feeling drained from everything. “When we get back I'll give you one of those massages that you like and then I'm completely at your mercy.” Adam grinned as he spoke, and Kris smiled softly right back at him. “Seriously, you're going to be so spoiled tonight.”
Kris let out a happy sigh. “Mmm. Can't wait.” He paused for a yawn and settled deeper into his seat. “Drive faster then before I konk out again, then.”
Adam chuckled softly, before Kris was lightly sleeping again, and he could still hear Adam's soft voice singing to himself as he drove. Adam's voice almost like a knight in blindly shiny armor, so bright and caring and protecting that any dark memories lurking around in his head didn't have the will to even get close to breaking him.
“Mmohmygod...” Kris groaned, melting into Adam's lap and the couch as Adam petted him softly, fingers scratching at his scalp, and his other hand rubbing circles into his stomach. He licked his lips, watching Adam pretty, pretty blue eyes above him. “I need to get hurt more often. This is amazing.”
Adam chuckled and leaned down, kissing him, and despite the awkward angle, it was perfect. “You can have it anytime you want it, baby. Just ask.”
Kris grinned and shifted a little bit. He'd been pampered since he got home, with Adam first massaging away his headache, then moving down his neck, and after slowly peeling away Kris' clothes and worshiping him at Kris' soft demands, Adam spread them out on the couch the way that Adam had them now, and Adam had fed Kris with soft, lingering brushes against his lips and cheeks, and when Kris had had enough Adam went back to brushing his hands over Kris' skin in loving circles, eventually ending up to where he was now.
Kris hummed thoughtfully, as a memory popped into his head. He remembered a quick flicker of his dream of him and Adam, tangled together and Adam almost... I wonder... should I?
Kris bit his lip lightly and opened his eyes to stare up at his love. Adam was watching him, his blue eyes soft and filled with too many emotions for Kris to figure out, and his pink, lovely lips curling just slightly, all put together with freckles that went on forever. I... I don't want it yet but... this feels... right somehow. I can just tell him, at least. “Hey Adam?”
Adam hummed softly, his voice quiet when he spoke. “Yes, Kris?”
Kris' heart sped up for a moment, and he shuddered, before he let out a breath and shot for it. “I, um, I had this... this dream recently.” He looked away when he felt his face heat up. Adam's fingers scratched encouragingly. “We, uh, were... having sex. Like... you, inside me, sex.” Adam's fingers paused and Kris swallowed, but went on. “I mean, it wasn't all nice, it... it wasn't a dream exactly, more a nightmare since it shifted afterward to one of my memories but-” He quickly shot in when those fingers twitched and Adam made a soft sound. “The beginning it was... it was good, nice. So nice, and... and I was... I want to do that.”
Adam made another soft sound, different from the last, a little more... something, but Kris couldn't get himself to stop now that he'd started. “I... I want to feel close to you and... I want to have that connection because, while I've never had that with anyone else, and that I've never actually felt anything right with anyone else. I...” He swallowed. “I know it would with you. I know I could be with you completely and actually... feel proud of myself, and happy and actually... actually enjoy it. And, I just...” He blushed some more and dropped down into a grumble. “I just, thought I should tell you.”
Adam was quiet for a few moments, then he sighed, brushing a hand through Kris' hair. “You know if you... wanted to have that, the closeness and connected thing, I could bottom for you.”
Kris brain went offline for a few seconds. I... never thought of that. I don't know if I... But, even not considering it before, Kris... wanted it. A lot. And it shouldn't trigger me at all, considering. But... Kris chewed on his lip again and he had to take several breaths to try and will away the sudden excitement that hit him like a wall of bricks. “I've... never done that before.” He flushed and looked away. What if I'm horrible? What if I turn him off completely I'm so bad, or... or hurt him? I could fuck it all up and...
Kris' rambling thoughts went on and on, even as Adam tilted his head back and those gentle blue eyes smiled at him. “If you want to do it, I can help you along with the how.”
Kris' heart felt like it grew about ten sizes and he smiled wide, then thought of something else. “What about...” He stopped, then thought of how to phrase it. “Um, I thought... you were more...” He shrugged. “Toppy.”
Adam rolled his eyes at that. “Yeah, well, since you I've taken more to having you in control. Turns me on like crazy. And besides...” He leaned down, rubbing his nose lightly against Kris' in a little eskimo kiss that had Kris between giggling and cooing. “I think we should be more of equals in this, sharing every experience we can equally. And I can wait until you are completely ready to do this. But...” He grinned devilishly and leaned down a fraction more to whisper into Kris' ear. “I've been having a few dreams lately, too. And I cannot wait to have you inside me.”
Kris swallowed, feeling himself burning up all over, then he laughed lightly. “Um, can I take a rain check for now?” Because he was so not ready for this yet. But... he wanted. That want was a burning mix of lust and love and need and so much else that he couldn't describe but there was so much fear and anxiety that he just... he couldn't do it yet. Not yet. But soon. He shuddered at that thought.
Adam chuckled and nodded. “Of course.” He nipped at Kris' ear, and that was not making it any easier for him to hold off on this. “But, for now, if you're feeling up to it, I'd like to take care of this somehow?”
Kris arched up into Adam as he traced the outline of Kris' hard on through his jeans. Kris gulped, and nodded frantically. “Oh, please. Please, please, please.” Adam tilted his head, asking with those expressing eyes what Kris wanted, and Kris swallowed, tracing his fingers along Adam's lips in answer.
Adam grinned, crooked, like he was mimicking Kris' smirk, and he gently lifted Kris up off of his lap, moving them around until Kris was relaxed back into the couch cushions with his legs dangling off the front, and Adam between his legs, and Adam drew his belt out slowly through a ring made with his fingers, almost like foreplay in the easy way he undid Kris' jeans and pulled them down his hips. Then Kris' head dropped back as Adam went to worshiping him, licking his thighs and nipping at the sensitive skin around his cock, and finally, after so much teasing, sucked him down.
Kris closed his eyes as Adam leisurely sucked and licked, and let his mind wander. Not that it wandered very far from the thoughts Adam gave him. Freckled legs around his hips and Adam panting and whining below him.
Needless to say, Kris didn't last very long. And he couldn't help from smiling when Adam pulled him up into his arms and carried him back to the bedroom, and tucked him in. When Kris saw Adam's obvious need when he undressed before he pulled up his sleep pants, Adam just winked, kissed Kris' on the temple and told him he'd take care of it before he padded off to the bathroom and it wasn't very long before Kris could hear Adam crying out - and did that ever add to the lovely thoughts swirling around in his head - and then Adam was curling up against him.
Kris smiled, tucking his face into the space of Adam's neck, made specially for him he thought because he just fit so perfectly, before he drifted off to sleep, the stress and worry of the day long gone from his mind.