What the Long Road Entails, Part I: The Beginning, Chapter VIII: Showing Your Teeth
Chapter VIII: Showing Your Teeth
As the summer was drawing to a close, it was getting closer and closer for the new school year at Constance. The girls shopped around the Upper East Side for their new fall school clothes. The thoughts of college were swirling in both of their heads, awaiting acceptance letters to their school of choice.
Blair picked up the perfect blue scarf that resembled the Yale blue. “S, have you thought about college yet and where you want to go?” Blair asked as she continued to stare at the soft cashmere.
Serena knew that Blair had always known that she wanted to go to Brown, just like she had known how it was Blair’s dream of attending her father’s alma mater, Yale. “B, you know that it is my dream to go to Brown, so why do you ask?”
Blair shrugged her shoulders still making no eye contact with the blonde, “Just wondering?”
Serena knew what Blair was trying to get at. She was trying to pry for information regarding their possible separation of being at two different schools. “Just don’t worry B, we haven’t even gotten our acceptance letters yet.”
Blair knew this yet there was no way that she couldn’t worry, she didn’t know if she was going to be more upset at not getting accepted or getting accepted and Serena not being able to go with her. She didn’t know how this was going to play out and she hated it. She hated not being able to predict her future.
Serena slung her arm around Blair’s shoulders “It’ll be okay, if worse comes to worse we will only be a hundred miles away from each other.” Serena smiled to Blair who sighed and rolled her eyes at Serena’s comment.
“Let’s go to Serendipity and get a huge sundae that we can share.” Serena said in a delighted way as if ice cream could freeze all of Blair’s worries. Blair just complied as Serena grabbed her hand as they skipped out of the door of Barney’s.
******
Serena lay in her sumptuous down covered bed feeling somewhat guilty for lying to Blair earlier as she looked at her early acceptance letter to Brown that she had received in the mail earlier in the week. The catalog of classes and housing scattered the duvet of her bed, as she sat and listed the pros and cons of going to Brown and not being able to be with Blair. Little to Blair’s knowledge, Serena had also applied to Yale and had been asked to do an interview with the Dean of Students. Serena was quite sure that Blair had not yet gotten such a letter. As if she had, Blair would have been bouncing off the walls in happiness. She didn’t know if she should tell Blair or not and if so when.
Serena heard a slight knock on the door, “Yes?” Serena said in almost an annoyed manner. Her brother’s head popped in, “Hey not to bother you but I just haven’t talked to you in a while.” Serena forced a smile while she tapped a spot next to her on her bed.
“What are you doing?” Eric asked as he gestured towards all of the college information skewed across his sister’s bed.
“Oh just thinking.” she said sounding quite depressed. Eric read the letter that said she had been accepted early to Brown,
“What is wrong, you got accepted to Brown, early!” He proceeded to read the Yale letter, “And you got an interview at Yale!” Eric studied the look on his sister’s face; she didn’t look like she should after all of the good news.
“I don’t know. I just know that Blair hasn’t got her letter for an interview yet and that is where she dreams of going.” her voice trailed off obviously knowing she just told somewhat of a lie, although it was partially the reason of her depression. It was more complicated.
“Seriously Serena, this has to do with Blair.” Eric sounded disappointed of Serena.
“Well Eric… she is…” she paused, “she’s my best friend.” Serena wasn’t satisfied with the term she just used for the woman that she had been having mind blowing sex with lately.”
Eric detected the hesitation in her voice, obviously there was something going on between the two girls. He could sense Serena’s problems fast, even though she was good at hiding her emotions. Eric gave his sister a knowing look, making it obvious that he sensed something out of the norm. “What’s going on Serena?” he asked.
“Nothing” Serena tried escaping the conversation, knowing that Blair wouldn’t want anyone to know about their secret love affair.
“Serena, I can tell that there is something wrong, so why don’t you just tell me?” Eric pried deeper, he knew that his sister would give in eventually.
Serena started, “Well it has to do with Blair…”
Eric rolled his eyes, “It obviously has something to do with Blair”
“Yeah…” Serena was looking at the picture of her and Blair from several years before that was on her nightstand, avoiding eye contact with Eric.
Eric’s mind flashed and combined all of the odd things that Serena was doing lately. Leaving the family vacation early, masturbating on the airplane, and spending lots of time with Blair alone. It all clicked, and if anyone knew things that were screaming of gay relationship than Eric was the person. “Serena… are you and Blair…” he couldn’t say it.
“Together, yes” Serena said what Eric couldn’t. “We are in love, and now it is hard because we don’t want to be separated from each other when we go to college and…” Serena began to ramble.
“Okay one thing at a time sis.” Eric was trying to ravel all of this information together. “Wow, I always thought you and Blair were close but wow!”
“That is all you have to say Eric, just wow.” Serena sighed.
“Well I just never thought of you as being a lesbian, but I know how you feel.” Eric continued.
“I am not a lesbian Eric, I don’t know what I am well, I am just confused! All I know is that I love Blair so much, more than anything else!” Serena explained.
“Alright, it is okay. As long as you love her and you know that you can always confide in me, especially about this stuff” Eric was reassuring.
Serena knew that Eric was the only one that could know about this. But she was glad that she could confide in someone, especially since he had some clue to what it was like to go through something like this.
“So do you think I should wait to tell her or do you think I should just be honest?” Serena asked.
“Well if you honestly care about her you will tell her, I know it isn’t easy but I think that is what you have to do.” Eric placed his arm around his sister’s shoulder.
Serena smiled slightly, “Yeah I will plan for us to go to dinner so that we can discuss it, I just hope she doesn’t get too upset.” She knew that Blair would be terribly upset; Serena just hoped it wouldn’t ruin anything.
“Well you know Blair better than me, but knowing her she isn’t going to be happy.” Eric said.
“Yeah well I have to tell her at some point, so I might as well get it over with.” Serena hugged her brother to thank him for his advice. “Thanks, I am so grateful to have a wonderful brother like you!”
“Okay sis, let’s not get too sappy!” They both laughed, and continued to talk about her college prospects.
******
The limo stopped on Fifth Avenue where Blair’s apartment was. As Serena waited in the back of the car she thought about how she was going to tell Blair the news of her college acceptance and interview. Blair stepped out of the doors in her navy Diane von Furstenburg cocktail dress, complete with her Pour La Victore platform heels. The driver opened the door for Blair as she climbed into the backseat. Upon the driver closing the door, Blair placed a kiss on Serena’s lips greeting her with a “Hey, baby.”
“Hey” Serena said dryly.
“So what did you want to talk about?” Blair asked as her hand swept against the soft skin of Serena’s exposed thigh.
“Umm…” Serena paused, “I want to talk about college and the future.” Serena’s comment was quite vague and she knew it she just rather talk about it over dinner.
“Okay.” Blair said while sighing.
The girls sat in silence, looking out the tinted windows until they arrived at their destination. The Chelsea District was quite busy, “Good thing I made reservations” Serena said making small talk.
“You always make reservations.” Blair said pointing out the obvious as they walked into Del Posto.
Serena presented her last name to the maître d’ and the lady brought them to their table. They sat down as the waiter came to their table to tell them the pastas of the day and asked if they would be having an appetizer.
“B, do you want an appetizer?”
“Sure we’ll take the Lobster Salad with the Broccoli Rabe and Dried Orange. And can we get the wine list.” Blair sounded demanding and she knew it. But she also knew that the conversation that her and Serena were about to have would call for a large glass of wine.
“Yes” the waiter replied and quickly handed Blair the wine list while she studied the selection.
It took Blair a moment to select the bottle that she wanted, “We’ll take a bottle of the 2002 Paolo Bea Rossi, is that fine baby?” Blair said with a smirk.
“Umm yeah…” Serena look baffled as Blair just made an adoring remark to her in public.
“Then we will take that one.” Blair said turning to the waiter.
The waiter looked quite puzzled also, “Alright, let me go get that for you.”
Blair waited for the waiter to walk away before she began to speak, “So S, let’s talk.” Blair said seriously.
“Okay B, let’s not have such an attitude when you don’t even know what I am going to say.” Serena knew that her girlfriend still wasn’t going to be happy.
“I don’t know what you are talking about Serena.” Blair boldly stated.
Serena rolled her eyes, “Well let me just get this over with. I got accepted to Brown early.” The blonde’s eyes darted down, nervously placing the fabric napkin upon her lap and messing with the neatly placed silverware. She awaited Blair’s response, but there was none.
Serena looked up from her silverware to Blair, who now had tears in her eyes and couldn’t make eye contact with Serena. Serena reached across the table to envelope the smaller brunette’s hand in her larger one. “B?” Serena stopped as Blair began to raise her gaze. “I just wanted to tell you, I didn’t want to keep it from you.”
A tear began to make its way down Blair’s face, “So are you accepting?” she snapped.
“I don’t know yet?” Serena’s eye reverted back to her lap. “Yale asked me to come to do an interview.” Serena knew that she shouldn’t have said this, especially now.
“What!” Blair shrieked, making a scene in the restaurant. But she didn’t care. “They didn’t even send me a letter or anything, how could they, how could you!” Blair stood up and threw her napkin on the table, running off towards the door.
The waiter was making it back to the table with the appetizer and the wine, but he stopped in his tracks as he saw the commotion. “Sorry!” Serena directed to him.
“Blair, wait!” Serena said running out the door after the smaller girl, finally reaching and grasping her hand.
“Don’t!” Blair said, tears streaming down her face.
“But Blair I didn’t even get to tell you anything!” Serena complained.
“Well Serena, I know you. And you always leave. So I don’t see how different it will be this time!” Blair’s words stung as they reached Serena’s ears.
Serena knew that Blair was mostly just angry because she had gotten an interview at Yale and she hadn’t. But she was also mad due to the fact that Serena had even applied there, like she shouldn’t have even had the right.
“Just let me go home, I want to be alone!” Blair’s words whipped out easily with no hesitation in her voice, lashing at Serena.
Serena stood speechless as Blair already had gotten one of her drivers to pick her up and bring her home. Serena watched Blair retreat to the backseat of the limo, not looking back at Serena’s frozen face.
After Blair’s limo had left Serena had snapped out of her trance, still baffled at how fast Blair had left. Serena hailed a cab that made its way back to her apartment building; all she could think of on the way was about Blair and how she loved her so much, and never wanted to hurt her again like in times past.
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A/N: Thanks for reading. I hope you all have stayed with me!
Thanks to my Beta
And thanks to Lady Gaga for the title idea!
Love you all,
~RedHighHeels_99