Feline Crossed (PG)
Um...I never thought it would happen, but here it is: I wrote a Lister/Cat fic. Proximity part 4 is giving me issues, so this is what I wrote instead. Enjoy?
Feline Crossed (PG)
Lister/Cat
Notes: I feel like a traitor to Lister/Rimmer...but there's a microscopic hint of it in here, too.
Lister had just managed to fall asleep when he was jolted back into consciousness by the Cat’s loud voice entering the dark bunkroom.
“It’s freezing in here! I could start a glass-cutting business with how pert my nipples are! And that ain’t even the worst of it, my…”
Lister cut him off, “Cat, I don’t wanna know. Why don’t you sleep on me bed, if yer so uncomfortable, eh? Isn’t that what cats do? Yeh could curl up here, next to me, like Frankie used to. …If yeh like.”
The Cat looked unconvinced.
“You sure that’s normal?”
Lister grinned. “Cats have been at it for millennia, yeh’ve got nothin’ to worry about. It’ll be like…like channeling your ancestors, or somethin’. Yeah?”
“Well…it sure would be warmer than the cargo decks. Alright, you got it. I’ll do you the favor of sleeping in your bed.”
“Gee, Cat. What an honor,” Lister replied, rolling his eyes. He shifted his body over and braced himself for the Cat to launch onto his bunk. The landing was surprisingly gentle, and Cat slunk gracefully into a lying-down position next to his favorite monkey.
Lister was slightly surprised by how close Cat was, and how little room there was to maneuver. Still, the feline’s body was warm, and comforting.
Apparently Cat felt similarly about his bunkmate, because he began to make a low, purring sound in his upper chest. He also began to rub his head against Lister’s shoulder affectionately, and paw at his midriff.
“Erm…” Lister wasn’t sure what to say. It wasn’t uncomfortable, and he knew it was instinct - he’d seen Frankie do this before, when content. He let the comment drop, and enjoyed the contact.
“Lister, what the smeg is going on up there?” Rimmer’s voice broke the moment, from the bunk below. “Should I go and get a bucket of cold water to throw on you two?” His voice was harsh, tinged with something besides annoyance.
“He’s just cold, Rimmer,” Lister replied evenly, reaching out to scratch Cat behind the ear and stroke his hair, “that’s all.”
“Hmph,” came the suspicious response from below.
The purring grew louder with Lister’s attention to petting him. Cat snuggled closer, and Lister’s eyes widened silently as he felt a distinct part of his friend pressed up against his leg. Cat seemed unabashed.
Lister’s hand stilled by Cat’s ear, and Cat’s purring ceased. The feline nudged his head into Lister’s hand more forcefully, demanding attention. A tiny sound like a squeak made its way out of Lister’s throat.
Cat would not be deterred.
“What’s the matter, monkey, I didn’t say you could stop!” he said, irritated. He slid himself on top of Lister, face-down, and began to paw at the man’s midriff again, a hint of claws giving a warning. Lister understood, and began to pet him again, behind the ears. The purring recommenced.
“You like that, eh?” Lister asked, in a measured tone.
“Mmm, yes, that’s nice,” Cat replied in a slow, pleasured voice.
“Ahem!” came the slightly frantic voice from below.
Lister had an evil thought.
“Oooh, Cat, yes, right there….” He feigned.
Rimmer shot out of bed, took one glance at the top bunk (The Cat lying atop Lister, licking up his collar in gratitude for the attention) and fled the room murmuring something about smegging disrespect and bestiality.
Lister let out a laugh, and looked into Cat’s face, expecting to share the joke.
“Great! Now alphabet-head is gone, we can have some real fun!”
Lister was speechless for some time.