Fic: Falling So High
Title: Falling So High
Rating: R
Pairing: Stannis/Davos
Word Count: 1,117
Summary: The Wall's fall prompts Stannis and Davos to finally admit their love for each other.
It had all been for naught. Renly, the old knight at Storm's End, Lord Florent and all those others he'd allowed Melisandre to burn, it had been for nothing. He would never sit the Iron Throne. Indeed the Iron Throne mattered little now. The Wall had fallen and the Long Night was upon them.
"It is not hopeless, Your Grace," Davos said. "Before there was a Wall, men defeated the Others and drove them far north. It was they who built the Wall. The Others can be defeated again, and the Wall rebuilt."
Stannis did not reply. What Davos said was true, but it would be another man who led that war. Stannis had fewer than five hundred men and their numbers fell with each attack whereas the enemy's strength increased with each dead man. He knew they would die here.
He was glad Davos was by his side. It was selfish; he should wish Davos safe in Cape Wrath with his wife and remaining sons. But his feelings were not within the realm of his control. He could acknowledge that now. All his life he had maintained tight control over himself, repressing feelings he'd thought he should not feel until he'd believed they were gone.
"My lord?" Davos touched his shoulder lightly.
"It's over," Stannis said simply.
Davos had never lied to him and he did not lie now. "Aye, my lord. We'll die fighting and it'll fall to another to lead Westeros to victory."
"What if there is no victory to be had? What if this is the end for man?"
Davos raised his maimed hand to his chest. The pouch he had worn for so long was not there. It had not been there for two years, since the disastrous Battle of Blackwater Bay, but Davos never seemed to remember its loss. He settled for spreading his hand over his heart. "The gods are good. They would not condemn all the children of the realm to eternal winter."
Stannis thought of the statues of the Seven he had condemned to Melisandre's fires. He had never believed in the Seven or in Melisandre's red god. But now that he was no longer certain of anything, he couldn't help wonder if there really were gods and if so, whether he had angered them into abandoning his people. "Do you think the gods are punishing me, Davos?"
Davos was silent for a moment and then he said, "You are the king, but you are also only a man. I don't believe the gods would punish everyone to punish one man."
"You think I'm being arrogant."
"No, my lord, I think you're afraid."
He started to react angrily but he realized Davos was right and he held his tongue. They stood in silence. Stannis wondered why Davos was here. Was he that absolute in his sense of duty towards his liege, or did he feel the same need to be near Stannis that Stannis felt for him? Why not ask him, he thought. There is nothing left to lose. But it was not true, there was something he could still lose.
Perhaps Davos's thoughts had traveled a similar path and he was braver. He said, "I don't regret my service to you. Becoming your man was the best thing that ever happened to me, and I don't mean because of the titles and lands you gave me."
Stannis touched Davos's maimed right hand. "Even though I shortened your fingers?"
"Yes," Davos answered. "It reminds me of how singular you are in all the world I've seen. All other men would have overlooked my past crimes in gratitude. Only you thought to reward me for what I did right and punish me for what I did wrong."
Stannis stroked the damaged fingers. "I was wrong. I was young and foolish and too certain that I knew right and wrong. It grieves me to think that I did this to you and I forgave lesser men worse crimes in my struggle to claim my throne. Will you forgive me, Davos?"
"Always, my lord."
He wanted to - even now, Stannis could not bring himself to put into words what he wanted. But he wanted it more than he'd ever wanted his wife Selyse or the witch Melisandre. He kissed Davos tentatively, awkwardly. Davos shut his eyes when he kissed him back, but Stannis kept his eyes open so he would not miss any part of the moment.
He was starved for Davos's touch, he realized, as they hurriedly shed their clothes. His skin tingled in an overabundance of relief wherever Davos touched him. He had ideas of what men did together in bed, but he immediately ruled out the most obvious of them. He would not dishonor Davos that way, and he was the king and he could not allow himself to be dishonored that way. But if I was not the king, I would have let him take me.
"My lord," Davos murmured between each of the kisses he planted on Stannis's body.
"Stannis," Stannis said. "Call me my name, Davos."
"Stannis," Davos said. He sighed the name as Stannis began to caress him. The feel of him was perfection. Bedding Selyse had always been an unpleasant chore and even with the skilled, passionate Melisandre, there had always been something missing. Stannis ran his hands over Davos's shoulders, his arms, his chest, his back, his buttocks, trying to memorize him by touch.
Davos drew a sharp intake of breath when Stannis touched his cock for the first time. He tried to protest when Stannis knelt and took him into his mouth, but his protests were ignored and eventually they turned into moans. Likely Stannis was clumsy in his sucking, but he tried to make up for it with fervor, trying to devour this part of Davos. He swallowed eagerly when Davos spent his seed, because it was Davos and he wanted his essence inside him.
"Stannis," Davos sighed. He stroked the hair at the back of Stannis's head. "Oh, my lord." He drew Stannis up and went to his own knees. "I love you, my lord," he whispered.
"I love you, Davos," Stannis replied. The relief of saying the words made him groan as much as the feel of Davos's mouth. He did not have to wonder anymore, and if Davos had wondered too, he didn't have to wonder either now.
They laid together on his pile of furs afterward like lovers. We are lovers, Stannis thought, allowing himself to put it into words. Perhaps Davos's gods were real and merciful after all. The Wall had fallen but it had lead to something good for the two of them.
Rating: R
Pairing: Stannis/Davos
Word Count: 1,117
Summary: The Wall's fall prompts Stannis and Davos to finally admit their love for each other.
It had all been for naught. Renly, the old knight at Storm's End, Lord Florent and all those others he'd allowed Melisandre to burn, it had been for nothing. He would never sit the Iron Throne. Indeed the Iron Throne mattered little now. The Wall had fallen and the Long Night was upon them.
"It is not hopeless, Your Grace," Davos said. "Before there was a Wall, men defeated the Others and drove them far north. It was they who built the Wall. The Others can be defeated again, and the Wall rebuilt."
Stannis did not reply. What Davos said was true, but it would be another man who led that war. Stannis had fewer than five hundred men and their numbers fell with each attack whereas the enemy's strength increased with each dead man. He knew they would die here.
He was glad Davos was by his side. It was selfish; he should wish Davos safe in Cape Wrath with his wife and remaining sons. But his feelings were not within the realm of his control. He could acknowledge that now. All his life he had maintained tight control over himself, repressing feelings he'd thought he should not feel until he'd believed they were gone.
"My lord?" Davos touched his shoulder lightly.
"It's over," Stannis said simply.
Davos had never lied to him and he did not lie now. "Aye, my lord. We'll die fighting and it'll fall to another to lead Westeros to victory."
"What if there is no victory to be had? What if this is the end for man?"
Davos raised his maimed hand to his chest. The pouch he had worn for so long was not there. It had not been there for two years, since the disastrous Battle of Blackwater Bay, but Davos never seemed to remember its loss. He settled for spreading his hand over his heart. "The gods are good. They would not condemn all the children of the realm to eternal winter."
Stannis thought of the statues of the Seven he had condemned to Melisandre's fires. He had never believed in the Seven or in Melisandre's red god. But now that he was no longer certain of anything, he couldn't help wonder if there really were gods and if so, whether he had angered them into abandoning his people. "Do you think the gods are punishing me, Davos?"
Davos was silent for a moment and then he said, "You are the king, but you are also only a man. I don't believe the gods would punish everyone to punish one man."
"You think I'm being arrogant."
"No, my lord, I think you're afraid."
He started to react angrily but he realized Davos was right and he held his tongue. They stood in silence. Stannis wondered why Davos was here. Was he that absolute in his sense of duty towards his liege, or did he feel the same need to be near Stannis that Stannis felt for him? Why not ask him, he thought. There is nothing left to lose. But it was not true, there was something he could still lose.
Perhaps Davos's thoughts had traveled a similar path and he was braver. He said, "I don't regret my service to you. Becoming your man was the best thing that ever happened to me, and I don't mean because of the titles and lands you gave me."
Stannis touched Davos's maimed right hand. "Even though I shortened your fingers?"
"Yes," Davos answered. "It reminds me of how singular you are in all the world I've seen. All other men would have overlooked my past crimes in gratitude. Only you thought to reward me for what I did right and punish me for what I did wrong."
Stannis stroked the damaged fingers. "I was wrong. I was young and foolish and too certain that I knew right and wrong. It grieves me to think that I did this to you and I forgave lesser men worse crimes in my struggle to claim my throne. Will you forgive me, Davos?"
"Always, my lord."
He wanted to - even now, Stannis could not bring himself to put into words what he wanted. But he wanted it more than he'd ever wanted his wife Selyse or the witch Melisandre. He kissed Davos tentatively, awkwardly. Davos shut his eyes when he kissed him back, but Stannis kept his eyes open so he would not miss any part of the moment.
He was starved for Davos's touch, he realized, as they hurriedly shed their clothes. His skin tingled in an overabundance of relief wherever Davos touched him. He had ideas of what men did together in bed, but he immediately ruled out the most obvious of them. He would not dishonor Davos that way, and he was the king and he could not allow himself to be dishonored that way. But if I was not the king, I would have let him take me.
"My lord," Davos murmured between each of the kisses he planted on Stannis's body.
"Stannis," Stannis said. "Call me my name, Davos."
"Stannis," Davos said. He sighed the name as Stannis began to caress him. The feel of him was perfection. Bedding Selyse had always been an unpleasant chore and even with the skilled, passionate Melisandre, there had always been something missing. Stannis ran his hands over Davos's shoulders, his arms, his chest, his back, his buttocks, trying to memorize him by touch.
Davos drew a sharp intake of breath when Stannis touched his cock for the first time. He tried to protest when Stannis knelt and took him into his mouth, but his protests were ignored and eventually they turned into moans. Likely Stannis was clumsy in his sucking, but he tried to make up for it with fervor, trying to devour this part of Davos. He swallowed eagerly when Davos spent his seed, because it was Davos and he wanted his essence inside him.
"Stannis," Davos sighed. He stroked the hair at the back of Stannis's head. "Oh, my lord." He drew Stannis up and went to his own knees. "I love you, my lord," he whispered.
"I love you, Davos," Stannis replied. The relief of saying the words made him groan as much as the feel of Davos's mouth. He did not have to wonder anymore, and if Davos had wondered too, he didn't have to wonder either now.
They laid together on his pile of furs afterward like lovers. We are lovers, Stannis thought, allowing himself to put it into words. Perhaps Davos's gods were real and merciful after all. The Wall had fallen but it had lead to something good for the two of them.