(no subject)
I didn't go to Epistemology today. We've moved onto Descartes and his ebil demon (as parallactic put it) and the idea of spending an hour and a half sitting through that made me slightly nauseous.
I spent yesterday wrestling with car trouble after discovering that the strange rattling noise my car had been making for two days was in fact a nail in my tire. Of course, by the time I figured it out I'd been driving on the tire too long and had to buy a new tire. That's just the way I wanted to spend money that I don't have. It's probably a sign that I don't need a three hundred dollar corset which, okay, a) nobody needs a three hundred dollar corset and b) that was probably a confusing non sequiter for people not living in my head. I got my hair done on Saturday and spent about an hour talking to my hair dresser about the corsets at Trashy Diva and pretty much decided I need one for Mardi Gras (again, need - such a limiting word). That's a much better use of money that I still don't have. Of course, when I called my parents and said "send me three hundred dollars for my birthday and ask no questions," it didn't totally work. Still, after I answered their questions they did agree to send me two hundred dollars for my birthday - a month early. Yay.
My time management skills are no good, or maybe it's just that this schedule is difficult for me to adjust to. Six am will never be easy, I don't care how long I have to do it. I have so much I ought to be doing, most of it writing, and I just feel blocked. I need to be working on my thesis; I have fic I want to finish. I agreed to submit another article to Synod newsletter and I have an essay I want to write for the literary magazine focused on students displaced by the hurricane. None of this happens. I sleep a lot; I watch stupid tv. I barely do homework, and it's not like I have that much. Then again, I probably shouldn't blame my procrastination on the work schedule. I say the same thing every semester; I'm always fairly unfocused, and even though it's a huge relief to be back in school, it's still almost worse this time around since it's my last semester. I don't even know what comes after this. I have this feeling that should freak me out more than it does. When I went to talk to old teachers at my high school in Roswell, they assumed I'd be terrified by the lack of a plan, and I wonder if there was a time when that really would have been the case. Have I changed all that much? I don't feel like I have, but I'm not bothered by the lack of a plan. Anything else would feel forced.
I spent yesterday wrestling with car trouble after discovering that the strange rattling noise my car had been making for two days was in fact a nail in my tire. Of course, by the time I figured it out I'd been driving on the tire too long and had to buy a new tire. That's just the way I wanted to spend money that I don't have. It's probably a sign that I don't need a three hundred dollar corset which, okay, a) nobody needs a three hundred dollar corset and b) that was probably a confusing non sequiter for people not living in my head. I got my hair done on Saturday and spent about an hour talking to my hair dresser about the corsets at Trashy Diva and pretty much decided I need one for Mardi Gras (again, need - such a limiting word). That's a much better use of money that I still don't have. Of course, when I called my parents and said "send me three hundred dollars for my birthday and ask no questions," it didn't totally work. Still, after I answered their questions they did agree to send me two hundred dollars for my birthday - a month early. Yay.
My time management skills are no good, or maybe it's just that this schedule is difficult for me to adjust to. Six am will never be easy, I don't care how long I have to do it. I have so much I ought to be doing, most of it writing, and I just feel blocked. I need to be working on my thesis; I have fic I want to finish. I agreed to submit another article to Synod newsletter and I have an essay I want to write for the literary magazine focused on students displaced by the hurricane. None of this happens. I sleep a lot; I watch stupid tv. I barely do homework, and it's not like I have that much. Then again, I probably shouldn't blame my procrastination on the work schedule. I say the same thing every semester; I'm always fairly unfocused, and even though it's a huge relief to be back in school, it's still almost worse this time around since it's my last semester. I don't even know what comes after this. I have this feeling that should freak me out more than it does. When I went to talk to old teachers at my high school in Roswell, they assumed I'd be terrified by the lack of a plan, and I wonder if there was a time when that really would have been the case. Have I changed all that much? I don't feel like I have, but I'm not bothered by the lack of a plan. Anything else would feel forced.