(no subject)
hello my loves, my non existant loves whom i love very much and talk to when everyone else has left us alone. i wanted to tell you that i love you, that i am madly and passionately in love with nothing. i want you, i want you, i want you. i want to know you and i want to love you, i want to talk to you, i want you to talk to me. so here we are, having a nice little conversation. i'm sitting here patiently waiting for you to materialize. would you hurry up please? i'm patient but i can't wait forever. yes, i'm a good girl. nobody seems to believe me though. yeah i'm doing okay in school. no, really, i am, i dont try or do my homework or study or anything of the sort so i feel a lot guilty about not getting straight A's because i know i could if i wasnt so hideously and dispicably lazy but the fact is i am and i really only can do as little as possible to get by. yeah, you're right, i did get a d on that last math test, but really, does it really matter? no! no it doesn't! stop! stop please. yes, it's true that no one likes me. but it's not my fault. i try to be nice to everyone and be what i'm supposed to be but somehow people think i'm fake or stuck up etc etc but i'm not! they think that and then they try to bring me down. they dont realize what i think, what you and i talk about, they dont know how much i feel, no no, i wouldn't say i'm sensitive, it's more like i love these people, i come to love these people i talk to for no reason at all and then they say something and they betray that love i have for them. but you would never do that. so it's just you and me. i can't trust anyone but you. you know that right? you are all i have. you are my loves. and you would never leave me.