(no subject)
All in all, I feel ok.
A simple sudden urge to throw up sometimes, which is understandable given my condition.
I still can not eat that much, which would explain the above.
But sleep is slowly coming back.
I still need to grab my videogames and books, but in a couple weeks or so we'll work that out.
It's not terribly important. After all, I still have my DS to play with so far-- although I do need more games for it. I've been more or less disappointed with most of the games that came out for it. I should have gotten a PSP.
I think I'm ok.
I know we never would have worked out.
I knew it a week ago.
I knew it fall last year.
I would have saved a lot of stress should I have gotten it over with when it needed to be done. A lot of stress. A lot of arguments.
The thing is though: we didn't argue on a conscious level, which is why it lasted so long. There was something subliminal keeping us apart and making us avoid each other. I think the truth is that neither of us really liked the other. There were discords on a superficial level.
We had virtually nothing in common. What about love? Yes, there's plenty of that.
I cried everyday for two months two years ago.
In the past week... maybe two or three days.
He might have realized too late, but it's all for the better.
He may have drank my emotions dry but at least he'll change now. He'll understand. He'll be sensitive to people's feelings and not just pass it off because dealing with it might mean he has to untangle his soul from that barbed wire around his heart. Painful at first, but then he'll find himself and actually be happy. Comfortable in his own skin. That's all I ever wanted.
I feel relieved among other things.
A simple sudden urge to throw up sometimes, which is understandable given my condition.
I still can not eat that much, which would explain the above.
But sleep is slowly coming back.
I still need to grab my videogames and books, but in a couple weeks or so we'll work that out.
It's not terribly important. After all, I still have my DS to play with so far-- although I do need more games for it. I've been more or less disappointed with most of the games that came out for it. I should have gotten a PSP.
I think I'm ok.
I know we never would have worked out.
I knew it a week ago.
I knew it fall last year.
I would have saved a lot of stress should I have gotten it over with when it needed to be done. A lot of stress. A lot of arguments.
The thing is though: we didn't argue on a conscious level, which is why it lasted so long. There was something subliminal keeping us apart and making us avoid each other. I think the truth is that neither of us really liked the other. There were discords on a superficial level.
We had virtually nothing in common. What about love? Yes, there's plenty of that.
I cried everyday for two months two years ago.
In the past week... maybe two or three days.
He might have realized too late, but it's all for the better.
He may have drank my emotions dry but at least he'll change now. He'll understand. He'll be sensitive to people's feelings and not just pass it off because dealing with it might mean he has to untangle his soul from that barbed wire around his heart. Painful at first, but then he'll find himself and actually be happy. Comfortable in his own skin. That's all I ever wanted.
I feel relieved among other things.