this new week brings...new
for the first time in 18 years i no longer stress about my future. Im hoping to get accepted to SOU. if i do, woo. i've been eating less-which is really weird, im not doing it intentionally. maybe its because i stopped doing drugs. oh yeah, i stopped doing drugs. its been hard to, they are everywhere and its hard to say no-but easy at the same time. i know i will be a happier person without them..and at a time like this i need to stay focused. so there is this girl that i am reallly into. not just any girl..i realllly want her to be mine. i do believe things could take off with us...she can teach me a lot. and this is what i want. i want someone to teach me things, i want to view different perspectives on life, i want to experience. also, i believe this girl has an amazing mind. the only thing that bothers me is that i know where it will end up eventually. ive had too many crushes, too many break ups, too many heartbreaks (hopeless romantic), too many destroyed friendships because of things like this. but..i dont want to pass up on this girl. there arent many of her around. ive made some changes in my life because i want this to work out. as for now, im kind of stuck and dont really know what to do. other than the typical girl issues..life is pretty eventful. i enjoy spending time with the isengard group. its great to see old faces..faces that i dont know how i lived without. guitar. yeah, i have taken a new spin on my whole approach to music. ive stopped caring about impressing people and what people will think of me/my skill. singing has become my new love-because i want my words to come out of my mouth, i want to tell my story. my words? far from teenage angst and petty relationships that lasted 2 months. actually, i dont understand why i even write in this thing.