(no subject)

[red_hands]

Well tonight I cant sleep to many things are on my mind. I dont no what to do. Today was amazing I had alot of fun. I love playing shows. But something or someone that I seen really got me down. I guess its just one of those days. Im just afraid that something bad is just waiting to happen. I feel very lost. Like I need someone in my life. I know I have friends I know I have my band and I love everyone all my friends and everything. I just wish I had someone to say I love you to or call and talk to for hours on the phone and someone to come to my bands shows. Someone who will love me for who i am. I just dont no where to start. Like so much has happened today I just dont no where to start. Today I became an uncle and like it made me think. I miss so many things I had in life. I feel like im ganna loose more. But like no matter what I have to make the best out of things. I need to get everything stait and I need to start caring about things more. Smoking has made me so layed back. Im going to cut down alot. I want to get my life together more. Maybe these habits are the ones that have held me down so much. Its like I always take the easy way out and just go smoke because I know there is no other way I will be happy unless I smoke. Im not ganna lie it makes me happy. But I think its getting out of hand.

Tomorrow I have another show maybe something will happen you know. I hope something tomorrow changes my life or makes it better. I just want to say thank you if you have ever been there for me or have helped me with anything. I love all my friends and if i have ever been a dick to you or anything im sorry id take it all back in a heart beat.

But im ganna go and try to sleep

<3 N!CKY B