(no subject)
Only an hour and tem mins until I can go home. I'm so going to have a huge glass of wine tonight and forget the world.
So, I found out that my smoking is the reason that Xavier is sick. Here I thought that if I could just smoke at work and never around him that things would be ok. But it turns out that his allergy to cigarettes extends beyond just smoke and to the smell that clings to people afterwards. Just great.
So, not only have I been unwittingly hurting someone very close to me, but some aspects of myself have come to light that I'm very unhappy with. I've been a very mopey, emo, weakling of a human being recently and it's pissing me off. Now, I'm so mad at myself for what I've become that I'm making every effort to change things.
I'm going to start running/jogging each night for half an hour so I can exercise and collect my thoughts. I don't care if it's freezing, and I don't care if Xavier goes with me or not. I'm just going to do it. I'm tired of being fat and unattractive. So, I'm going to change that. Within a year, I plan on being mostly in shape. Or at least, more attractive to myself.
I'm also tired of looking for a relationship. I'm going to be happy with what I have; a bunch of friends who take care of all the needs I have. Some are there for me emotionally, and some are there for me physically. I'm happy with how things are. My needs do not need to be met by one person and one person only.
Also, people who are annoying me are going to be getting an ear full very soon. I'm sick and tired of being a pushover, and I'm going to fight to do what I want. If I have to burn some bridges along the way, so be it. My life will be much less dramaful for it.
I'm also tired of being stagnant. I'm going to take some time and study my Japanese more. I'm going to learn medical vocabulary within the next year and work on becoming an interpreter. I'm also going to sit down and write letters to my host families and other important people I've lost contact with. I need to keep in touch with all the awesome people I know so I don't lose them.
At least work is going well. I'm happy with my new job, and as soon as I can catch up on all the stuff I need to do it'll be cake.
So yeah. Stuff, things, and people.
*RAWR!!!*
So, I found out that my smoking is the reason that Xavier is sick. Here I thought that if I could just smoke at work and never around him that things would be ok. But it turns out that his allergy to cigarettes extends beyond just smoke and to the smell that clings to people afterwards. Just great.
So, not only have I been unwittingly hurting someone very close to me, but some aspects of myself have come to light that I'm very unhappy with. I've been a very mopey, emo, weakling of a human being recently and it's pissing me off. Now, I'm so mad at myself for what I've become that I'm making every effort to change things.
I'm going to start running/jogging each night for half an hour so I can exercise and collect my thoughts. I don't care if it's freezing, and I don't care if Xavier goes with me or not. I'm just going to do it. I'm tired of being fat and unattractive. So, I'm going to change that. Within a year, I plan on being mostly in shape. Or at least, more attractive to myself.
I'm also tired of looking for a relationship. I'm going to be happy with what I have; a bunch of friends who take care of all the needs I have. Some are there for me emotionally, and some are there for me physically. I'm happy with how things are. My needs do not need to be met by one person and one person only.
Also, people who are annoying me are going to be getting an ear full very soon. I'm sick and tired of being a pushover, and I'm going to fight to do what I want. If I have to burn some bridges along the way, so be it. My life will be much less dramaful for it.
I'm also tired of being stagnant. I'm going to take some time and study my Japanese more. I'm going to learn medical vocabulary within the next year and work on becoming an interpreter. I'm also going to sit down and write letters to my host families and other important people I've lost contact with. I need to keep in touch with all the awesome people I know so I don't lose them.
At least work is going well. I'm happy with my new job, and as soon as I can catch up on all the stuff I need to do it'll be cake.
So yeah. Stuff, things, and people.
*RAWR!!!*