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Dearest Sirs and/or Madame(…s) of the Higher-Ups,
Unless you want me to continue making the new recruits huddle in corners, rocking back and forth while sobbing for their mothers and clutching their guns to their heaving bosoms like security blankets (don't worry, I haven't taught them that the safety actually goes off and they're too cutely dense to figure it out all by themselves) then, please, stop fucking sending them to me.
I am nobody's mama, I did not sign up for this shit, and I have things to do. You know, those things? Those things you pay me for? Yeah, those.
Respectfully and with affection and sloppy kisses,
Asuma Sarutobi,
Sergeant, Arma, Celo Division,
(And your biggest fan!)
Unless you want me to continue making the new recruits huddle in corners, rocking back and forth while sobbing for their mothers and clutching their guns to their heaving bosoms like security blankets (don't worry, I haven't taught them that the safety actually goes off and they're too cutely dense to figure it out all by themselves) then, please, stop fucking sending them to me.
I am nobody's mama, I did not sign up for this shit, and I have things to do. You know, those things? Those things you pay me for? Yeah, those.
Respectfully and with affection and sloppy kisses,
Asuma Sarutobi,
Sergeant, Arma, Celo Division,
(And your biggest fan!)