(no subject)
I have become a consumerist, I've spent over 50$ this month, perhaps as much as 70$, Almost a days worth of work back at the warehouse. Of course, This month I've bought: Flour, Sugar, Milk (that went bad), Butter, Eggs, Baking Powder, Vanilla Extract, Skittles, Random Candies, Salt, Lemon Extract, A cookie sheet, A muffin Tin, Two hairbrushes, A waterbottle, A cutting Board, A Potato Peeler, Celeary, Carrots, Green Onions, A mixing Bowl, Measuring Cups, Measuring Spoons (that I lost), Baking Cups, Some Pencils...
*sigh*
I used to be the sort of person who went on the band tour and spent a maximum of 15$. Who prided himself on being frugle, but money, it seems, wants to be spent. Especially when its on something easy like a debit card. I've taken to playing warcraft III way too much, but its a game that gets more enjoyable the more one plays. I'm behind on the reading for public choice, I'm only a third of the way through the operations research assignment for friday, I'm supposed to be researching something for my public choice Thesis paper, I'm supposed to be reading the master and margarita (which I read three months ago).
I've degenerated into a total slacker, taking on many of the qualities that I loath... things I never expected to see in myself. I no longer percieve myself as having any chance of personal success. I don't think I have much chance of suceeding as a student... at which point, after paying lots of money for the college evaluation process, I'll have to go get a job doing something that I don't really want to do, pay off my debts... and die? Maybe I should drop out of college, but if I did the money that I've spent on it so far would be largely wasted. A college drop-out is only marginally above a highschool graduate in esteem... I just don't have the willpower to be a student anymore. To work hard, to do well in my classes, I've tried all those things, and have been met with failure.
I'm intelligent... almost everyone I met thinks that I see the world differently then the norm. I"m not good at thinking outside the box, but I'm in a different box then everyone else. One of the carded members approached me in band about signing the chemical free housing contract... caught off guard, I signed my name in the "Print name here" section, and then to make up for it printed my name in the signature section and then dated it the 29th... which is not even a day in this month. How did I get to be so totally incompetant... I completely missed doing something that I was supposed to do this afternoon.... It wasn't terribly important, but when I say that I would do something, I like to be accurate. I like to be accurate in genneral.
Aye, what a wretch am I.
*sigh*
I used to be the sort of person who went on the band tour and spent a maximum of 15$. Who prided himself on being frugle, but money, it seems, wants to be spent. Especially when its on something easy like a debit card. I've taken to playing warcraft III way too much, but its a game that gets more enjoyable the more one plays. I'm behind on the reading for public choice, I'm only a third of the way through the operations research assignment for friday, I'm supposed to be researching something for my public choice Thesis paper, I'm supposed to be reading the master and margarita (which I read three months ago).
I've degenerated into a total slacker, taking on many of the qualities that I loath... things I never expected to see in myself. I no longer percieve myself as having any chance of personal success. I don't think I have much chance of suceeding as a student... at which point, after paying lots of money for the college evaluation process, I'll have to go get a job doing something that I don't really want to do, pay off my debts... and die? Maybe I should drop out of college, but if I did the money that I've spent on it so far would be largely wasted. A college drop-out is only marginally above a highschool graduate in esteem... I just don't have the willpower to be a student anymore. To work hard, to do well in my classes, I've tried all those things, and have been met with failure.
I'm intelligent... almost everyone I met thinks that I see the world differently then the norm. I"m not good at thinking outside the box, but I'm in a different box then everyone else. One of the carded members approached me in band about signing the chemical free housing contract... caught off guard, I signed my name in the "Print name here" section, and then to make up for it printed my name in the signature section and then dated it the 29th... which is not even a day in this month. How did I get to be so totally incompetant... I completely missed doing something that I was supposed to do this afternoon.... It wasn't terribly important, but when I say that I would do something, I like to be accurate. I like to be accurate in genneral.
Aye, what a wretch am I.