Skookum 12
Title: Skookum 12/?
Author: rebop13
Rating: NC17
Summary: Alternate universe, Luke is running away from something, Noah finds him. In this chapter, camping!
Disclaimer: Don't own, mean no harm, for fun.
Author's Note:For Moey Moe, and all my lovely Nukies
Noah took Highway 101, heading south. Driving fast was a mistake, as it was like an dropped spool of ribbon lying beside an incredible just unwrapped gift, the Oregon coast. And it truly was the best of presents, breathtaking and beautiful. When Noah first moved to Oregon, he'd been completely amazed to discover that the miles and miles of beaches were all public-no hotel or private residence could lay claim or block access. Although he'd become a bit used to it living so close, Luke's ecstatic reaction to it reminded him of just how wonderful it all was.
It was a gorgeous afternoon, and there were whitecaps scudding over the Pacific, and a sun warmed ocean breeze filled the truck interior. Luke looked happy and relaxed, blond hair blowing every which way, dark brown eyes sparkling in anticipation of their big adventure. As they drove, Noah felt himself unwind as well, and he had to admit again what a good idea this was.
They sang along to Noah's Van Morrison cd, and it was nice that Luke was learning the words to some of his favorite songs. Luke also was in major magpie mode, making curious comments about everything they drove by.
They went through the town of Waldport and over another spectacular WPA bridge, spanning the Alsea river. Luke loved odd place names, and he tried them out on his tongue, favoring the old native words-Tillicum, Wokanda and Suislaw. And the name Yachats, the small town where they stopped for coffee, really cracked him up.
"It's pronounced Ya-Hots, Luke." Noah teased as they pulled in to the parking lot. "Don't want you to embarrass yourself in front of the locals. You've been here too long to sound like a tourist."
"Really?" Luke grinned. "Well, I would like to point out that you locals are a tad touchy. I don't know how many times I was told to say, "ORYGUN" instead of, "Oregone"."
"Well, I assume you would correct me if I kept saying, "How wonderful it is to visit your lovely state of Ill-in-noise." Noah countered, starting to clamber out of the truck.
"Touche, Mayer." Luke chuckled for a moment, then he gave Noah a sudden very serious look, and gently grabbed his wrist. "You will, um, visit me-right? In my lovely state of Illinois?"
Noah swallowed hard, as this was something he didn't want to think about anymore. Luke actually leaving him, and being thousands of miles away. It caused an unexpected sharp, stabbing pain in his chest. "Of course, baby-of course I will." He leaned over and kissed his cheek.
Luke kissed him back, still pretty serious, and he seemed to be searching his face for something. "I'm so glad-and I will hold you to it, Noah." He said finally, and the soft look in his eyes made Noah's heart beat really fast. Then he playfully wagged Noah's chin, breaking the intensity. "Now let's go get that latte you have been jonesing for since Waldport."
Noah quietly followed him into the coffee shop, heart still in a turmoil. Remembering that Luke had a complicated life and a family to deal with, and that Noah and Towagh Bay was just a pit stop. He took a deep breath, and tried to concentrate on the here and now, and not worry about tomorrow.
It was going to come soon enough.
****
Lattes in cup holders, Noah drove to the town of Florence, where they made another quick stop at a small grocery. Noah stocked up on the camping basics: ice, milk, coffee, eggs, bread, bacon, hamburger and cheese, and made sure healthier food groups were represented-apples, oranges, fresh spinach, onions, tomatoes and green peppers. Luke, however, couldn't resist the junk food aisle, and Noah got to tease him about the strawberry pop and the Twizzlers. Still, at heart, a five year old, and Noah resisted an urge to kiss him senseless. Then he got irritated when Luke insisted on paying for all of it, and he somehow lost the argument. He was placated by a nice kiss in the truck that tasted suspiciously like a Twizzler.
Right outside Florence was a camp ground that the Triplehorns frequented, and that Noah had been to once-the Jessie M. Honeyman State Park. It was two miles inland from the ocean and was the beginning of the Oregon Dunes, a natural wonder that rivaled a scene from the Arabian Nights.
They were lucky, as there were camp sites to be had, as it was in the middle of the week. They were able to select one off the beaten path, with some privacy, but still within easy walking distance of Lake Cleawox. Honeyman consisted of two pristine lakes with sandy beaches, suitable for swimming and boating, and the camp sites themselves were nestled under tall, shady Sitka spruce. There were showers available and picnic tables, canoes for rent, and lodge with a fireplace. There were quite a few people there, but it wasn't overly crowded.
Luke was pretty excited about the park, and couldn't stop raving about it, so Noah felt he had made a good choice. They had fun setting up camp, something that Noah's neatnik, highly organized soul found deeply satisfying for some reason. It also brought back a few unwanted memories of the Colonel, but before he could brood about it, Luke had him in complete stitches over the camping disasters he'd experienced as a kid. He was accompanied in these adventures by his two best buddies. Casey and Will. Luke Snyder's Outdoor Exploits were an endless parade of collapsing tents, pouring down rain, forgotten equipment, Casey's unfortunate reaction to eating chili, and a garter snake in a sleeping bag. The best story was about Casey deciding to give the sleeping Luke and Will a big scare.
"So Case-never big on stealth-fumbles his way out of the tent, even stubbing his toe and cursing. I figured something was up, as normally Casey, once asleep, was completely dead to the world, and snored like a sixty year old man instead of a thirteen year old kid. I woke Will up, and we followed him outside,and we saw that he was putting on a Jason mask, from the Friday the 13th movies. Case was never big on subtle, either." Luke rolled his eyes, and Noah could just picture the scene.
"So, while the Frightmaster was getting ready to completely terrify us, I gave a signal to Will. Will always knew what I was thinking, and we both pulled our hoodies over our heads. We tiptoed behind Case, now in full out Jason Voorhees regalia, heading back to the tent. He was even giggling to himself, and god, Noah, it was so hard not to laugh."Luke eyes were bright and sparkling, totally into spinning his wonderful yarn." So, just as he was about to have his big moment, and was drawing back the tent flap, and I tapped him on the shoulder. He whirled around so fast the mask slipped off, and gave this little girly scream-"Luke demonstrated, and it sounded like a mouse singing tenor. " and not only ran over the tent, but I swear to god, he smacked right into a fucking tree. He knocked himself out."
Luke was now laughing so hard, there were tears in his eyes, and Noah wasn't far behind him. "You're kidding? Oh my god! He must have been sooo embarrassed."
"Oh, he was pissed. "Not fucking funny you guys!" he said over and over, which just made it worse. He had this big ol' giant goose egg on his head, and every time I looked at him, I about peed my pants." Luke wiped at his eyes." But Case was always a good sport, and after a while, he finally saw the humor in it. I still tease him about it..."Luke suddenly sobered, a wave of sadness covering his features."God..I miss him."
Noah's laughter completely died. He was almost envious of Luke, who seemed to have such a joyful, carefree childhood, so different from his own very lonely one. But then he realized how hard it would be to lose so many friends, something he never had to worry about. He threw an arm around Luke's shoulders."I'm so sorry, baby. And I get how much it hurts-but, you know-Casey going to be thinking about all this stuff too. All that you shared. Give him some time, Luke. He'll get there." Noah added, praying he was going to be right.
"Yeah." Luke said absently, eye far away.
Noah squeezed him tighter."Hey-here's a transparent ploy to distract you. How 'bout a swim before dinner? I brought along extra trunks. 'cuz I'm a devious bastard."
Luke shook off the gloom, and his eyes got bright again, and Noah began to realize how much he lived for that spark." Why, yes you are, Mr. Mayer. But I think I will go along with your nefarious scheme. "He then shocked Noah by patting his ass."Too bad we have to wear trunks though."
"Well, cold water might necessitate them if you were considering showing off your assets, Snyder. " Noah slyly teased back. "God, I've created a Frankenstein."
"Nah. Just a horndog." Luke leered and winked.
****
They changed into their trunks on the campground showers, and smeared sunscreen all over each other. He felt a bit self conscious being so undressed in public, although the baggy blue shorts he was wearing hid the worst scars. He took a deep breath and sucked it up, and realized most people weren't paying the slightest attention. The were too busy swimming or sunning themselves. It was a peaceful scene at Cleawox, some little kids and parents were playing and splashing at the shallow end, a few teenagers were doing cannonballs off a distant raft, a canoe scudded by, and a couple of seniors lay dozing, books on their chests. Luke and Noah spread out their towels and walked out into the water, which was just about perfect.
"Oh my god, this is sooo nice." Luke said happily, running out into deeper water. He began to swim, and glided along with total ease, like a graceful seal, Noah following close behind. It felt good, the weightlessness, although it did bring back the frustrating hours spent in the hospital therapy pool, trying to get his damaged leg to cooperate.
But that was a long time ago, and he forced himself back the present. He was swimming in tandem with a gorgeous man, whose skin was burnished a golden color by the late afternoon sun. Noah heard the words to 'Topleo Honey' ringing in his head, and they described Luke so well, sweet on the outside and on the inside. He was smiling wide, like a naughty, carefree kid, and he splashed Noah in the face and challenged him to a race, which he won handily. Noah could envision him easily as a boy now, wandering around his grandmother's farm in the high summer, barefoot and a little dirty, hair made blonder by the sun, chewing on a piece of hay.
They swam for almost an hour, until Noah heard Luke's stomach growl, even under the water. They both cracked up, and Noah suddenly realized how hungry he was too. Those cinnamon rolls were a long time ago. They left the lake as the sun was getting low, making the water turn a deep blue, and casting soft shadows. Towels slung over their shoulders, they wandered back to their camp, smelling woodsmoke and hamburgers being grilled. Luke's stomach growled again, even louder, and Noah couldn't stop laughing.
Luke decided to change in the tent, while Noah went back to the showers. It was just too hard for him to get dressed inside the confined tent space as his leg didn't bend terribly well. By the time he had returned to the camp, he saw that Luke had gotten everything ready, spreading out Annie's homemade bounty on their small picnic table. They ate and laughed, consuming an embarrassing amount of Annie's spinach quiche and sourdough bread, washing it all down with sweet tea. Noah couldn't remember a better meal, which was enhanced no doubt by the setting and the company.
Completely stuffed, they both slowly cleaned up, vowing to attack Annie's apple pie later. Noah made a fire, while Luke settled in a folding chair, with one of his books. When he finished, he sat down beside it, back supported by an old log, He was really starting to feel the effects of his early morning wake-up call, and he began feel very sleepy. When he was in the army, Noah learned how to doze even in the most uncomfortable of positions and situations. Pretty soon, he was out like a light.
When he woke up, it was dark, and he discovered he was now lying on his side, head cushioned by a rolled up sleeping bag. Luke was sitting close by, features bathed in the firelight. Noah yawned and felt somewhat embarrassed as he sat up, rubbing his eyes.
"Man-sorry. What terrible company. I didn't mean to fall asleep." Noah apologized, then nudged Luke with a shoulder." But thanks for the pillow."
"You're welcome-and don't apologize. You seemed pretty tired, and I was impressed you could nod off sitting up like that." Luke smiled.
"Something I learned on patrol. You take any opportunity to sleep when you can get it." Noah realized he really didn't want to follow this line of conversation, and switched subjects. "Any pie left?" he teased.
"I left you at least one piece." Luke shot back, smile widening.
Noah stretched a little, and decided that now would be a good time as any to give Luke his present. He wasn't sure how Luke would take it, and it scared him more than a little, but he knew in his heart that he needed to take a few more risks where Luke was concerned. He awkwardly stood up and limped over to the tent, pulling out his duffle bag.
"You turning in?" Luke asked quietly, a little disappointment in his voice.
"Nope. I got a second wind. Actually, I have something for you." Noah pulled out the gift that Helen had wrapped and another small box. "A, um, just because gift. " Noah returned to the fire, and handed Luke the wrapped present first.
Luke seemed both shocked and pleased."God Noah-you didn't have to do this!"
Noah sat down very close to Luke."Yes I did. C'mon, cowboy-open it."
Luke rewarded him with this huge, sweet smile and he ripped off the green and blue paper. Inside was a leather bound journal, with an elaborately hand tooled design in the outside. It was done in a style reminiscent of the tribes of the Northwest, and showed a stylized black and white bird perched on a pine tree. Noah couldn't believe how perfect it was when he saw it in Helen's shop. Luke didn't say anything, but traced the design with his fingers, and Noah panicked a little.
Shit. He hated it.
He began to babble."It's no big deal. I though it would be good for a diary, or, uh, something. You mentioned to me once about wanting to be a writer, and I figured you might put down some of those tall tales you've been telling me in it-about Oakdale, or god, that great story about Casey trying to scare you and Will. And I was hoping maybe it would remind you of your time in Oregon." Noah held on tight to the smaller box now, fingers trembling.
"Why a bird?" Luke finally said.
"Oh..it's silly. Charlie said people have a totem animal, and when I think of you, I think of um, a magpie."
"A magpie?" Luke finally looked up from the book and at him and Noah now saw he had tears standing in his eyes. " H-how come?"
'They are so smart and brassy and full of curiosity." Noah felt himself blushing, as it sounded sort of stupid when he said it out loud, and he was also shaken by Luke's tears. "They are also incredibly brave...like you."
"God. I love it. Thank you. I don't think I ever had a nicer present." Luke opened the book and saw the inscription that Noah had written on the fly leaf. He read it out loud, his voice cracking as Noah nervously gnawed his lower lip. " 'Sometimes you put you walls not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down. Noah' " Luke gazed at him for a few seconds, so much emotion on his face, it panicked Noah a little.
"This is something to go with it. I-I hope you don't mind me giving it to you." Noah stammered, thrusting the box at Luke. There was a sharp ache inside as he did it, but it was too late now to back out.
Luke wiped at his eyes, and reverently put the journal down before taking the box from Noah's now very obviously trembling hands. He opened the small black box and found a Waterman fountain pen, in a deep lacquered red.
Noah cleared his throat. "I guess I'm re-gifting a little. This... belonged to Charlie. I bought for him when we were in Paris, on leave. It was, um, the only present I ever gave him, and he didn't have much of a chance to use it."
Luke seemed to be taken completely aback." Noah...I can't take this-"
Noah abruptly cut him off. "Yes you can. Please, Luke. I realized something important, thanks to you, when you found Charlie's Fancy Dance costume under my bed. This pen was just sitting in a drawer in my desk. They are just things, yeah, but they were important to Charlie, and not meant to be hidden away, or locked up somewhere."
Noah suddenly noticed, with a start, that he was shaking all over."And...I guess I also need to let..let some of it go. Charlie loved that pen. You have a lot in common with him-you both are so good with words. He loved books, and it was his big dream to be a writer. I said this before, he would have really liked you, Luke. So I hope you use that pen, and think about him sometimes. He would be proud, and I would be too, if you use it to follow your dreams."
Luke's face was now completely wet with tears, and he pulled Noah in his arms. Noah rested his head on Luke's strong shoulder, and listened to Luke quietly cry. He envied those tears all of a sudden, as he knew deep down he had an ocean of them inside. But they wouldn't come. He just held tight to Luke, and tried to make his tremors go away.
"Thank you, Noah." Luke said softly, finally pulling back so he could look Noah in the eyes. "Thank you so much. I'll treasure that pen forever, and I promise to put it to good use." He gave Noah a very gentle kiss and it tasted like salt. "Hey-do you have a totem animal?" he asked, while cupping Noah's face with both hands.
"Yeah-Raven." Noah tried to smile."I think Charlie was just trying to tease me about my big nose."
"No, he wasn't." Luke said firmly. "I remember that story you told me when we first got together, about Raven stealing the sun from the chief, and letting the light out into the world. I can see the parallel. You hide so much of yourself, Noah. And maybe it's time to unlock that too, set it free..." He paused and gazed at Noah very steadily. "Noah..sweetheart...how did Charlie die?"
Oh no. God. Not that. Anything but that. Noah heard a roaring in his ears, and ice formed in his gut. He pulled away from Luke. "Why the fuck would you want to know?"
Luke didn't seem to be perturbed by his reaction. "Because I don't think you have ever really dealt with it. No family to grieve with-either yours or Charlie's. You've carried all this pain for so damn long Noah, and you have done it all alone. But-you aren't any more, Noah. You have me now, sweetheart."
Noah scrambled to his feet, causing a great deal of pain to shoot down his leg. He wanted to run, and get the hell out of there. Instead he nearly crashed into the tent. He thought about just driving off, but by then he stopped himself. He staggered over to a tree, and leaned against it, sure if he didn't, he'd fall over.
He heard Luke's soft, cautious footsteps behind him. "Noah-I am so, so sorry. I went too far, and I really upset you. Please forgive me. Please."
Noah didn't turn, just scraped at some bark with his thumb. He managed to find his voice, and it took everything he had to keep it steady. "I-I do. It's just...too hard, Luke. Okay? He died..saving my life. When I landed in the hospital, it took everything I had to want to keep on living. In fact, I tried to kill myself once." Noah took a breath, as this was something he had never spoken of outside an army hospital. "The only thing that stopped me is that the world lost someone special, and I was one of the last people who really knew him, and could honor his memory. But I guess I failed, as I haven't been able, up until now, to really say one fucking word. Not one. I'm too messed up."
Luke lightly touched his back."Noah-listen to me. You loved Charlie so much, and you have honored his memory. Maybe not in words, but how you live your life. And the Skookum-it's the most amazing monument ever, so much better than a marble statue or a foundation. But you're not marble, and you need to let yourself feel-and you can trust me, sweetheart. With everything."
Noah finally turned around, and Luke was gazing up at him with such warmth and compassion that the ice inside melted, and to his absolute shock, he felt some tears rolling down his face. They were the first he had shed since coming to Towagh Bay. He let go of the tree and fell into Luke instead, who held him up and let him cry. They were silent, hot tears, and each painful sob cut like a knife. But he somehow needed the hurt, and when he was finally done, he was near collapsing.
Luke gently led him to the tent, and they both crawled inside. Noah just curled up close, kitten weak. He hadn't expected this scenerio, and wasn't sure how he felt about it, his emotions were all over the place, and he felt naked and raw. But he did know one thing-he needed Luke, and was so glad that he was there. He fell asleep to the sound of Luke's steady breathing and the wonderful feel of his arms wrapped abound him tight.
****
It was hot, like the bottom of a frying pan, and there was acrid dust and smoke everywhere. Noah could smell his own sweat and fear, and there was a coppery scent of blood threatened to drown out most of it. There was nothing but bombed out buildings around him and Noah gripped his gun tight, knuckles white. He'd lost Luke. He'd fucked up and he'd lost Luke. He couldn't do anything goddamn right, just like the Colonel said.
He stepped in something slick, and realized he was walking through a pool of blood. It was streaming from an alley that seemed far too familiar. A sick, terrible feeling of dread washed over him. He didn't want to enter that alley, not ever, but his feet moved him forward.
He turned a corner and saw him sitting there-what was left of him. He was sitting on the ground, back against the wall, legs completely gone, just bloody, ragged stumps. Luke's beautiful face was so pale and so dead. Noah was too late and it was all his fucking fault, all his fucking,stupid fault. He should have died instead, not Charlie, not Luke, not-
Someone was shaking him awake. Noah gasped and panicked in the dark, completely disoriented. Strong hands soothed him. "Noah, Noah-it's okay. Shhh. You are having a nightmare. It's okay, baby. I'm here and it's okay."
Noah gulped in some air, eyes adjusting to the dark. He grabbed at Luke, to reassure himself that he was there and he was whole and alive. Warm solid flesh met his fingers, undamaged and unbloodied. It was just a bad fucking dream.
"I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up." Noah whispered, voice ragged. "I wasn't yelling or anything, was I?" he asked with a cringe.
Luke gently petted him. "No-you were just thrashing around. God, sweetheart, you're soaked."Noah licked his lips and tasted salt,and realized his t-shirt was stuck to him. "It's like you ran a marathon."
He experienced a wave of embarrassment over how much he seemed to be falling apart. "S-sorry."
" Don't be." Luke lightly stroke his face. "Want to talk about it?"
"In all honesty, not really." Noah answered, wanting desperately to erase the image of Luke's dead eyes from his head.
There was a brief pause and then Luke said quietly, "Hey-can I ask you a favor? Would you come with me?" And Noah hesitated, not wanting to do anything more than hold on to Luke and remain in a fetal position.
But Luke rarely asked him for anything. "Okay."
He could see the curved white of Luke's smile before he crawled out of the tent, and Noah shakily followed, leg knotted and groaning in protest. He had a hard time standing upright, but he managed, and he found Luke supporting him. The cool night air made his wet t-shirt stick to his skin, and he shivered. Luke's hand was rough and reassuring as it grabbed on to his, and Luke led his bewildered, still somewhat nightmare fogged self away from the camp site.
The rest of the park seemed to be in deep slumber, Noah could make out tent shapes and the glowing coals of low banked fires. The moon lit the narrow path they were on, finally reaching the edge of the lake. The only sound was the water lapping on the shore, and the wind rustling through the pines. In the sky, a few stars were scattered and the moon was hanging low-it was a perfect, perfect night.
Luke, to Noah's amazement, toed off his shoes and yanked his t-shirt over his head. He unzipped his shorts and with just his boxers on, waded out onto the lake, water past his calves. He held out his arms to Noah, and he found himself obeying as if hypnotized, awkwardly getting out of his jeans and sneakers, and letting his wet t-shirt fall to the ground. He walked towards Luke and the water was cool, but not freezing as he initially imagined. Luke grabbed his wrists and pulled him out further in the lake, until the water came up to their collarbones.
"I did a lot of night swimming when I was a teenager." Luke began, and Noah now recognized his storytelling voice. "My grandma has this big pond on her property and when I felt restless and sad,I would go down there. I loved it in the dark, with the sound of frogs, and the moon hanging like a big lantern overhead as I would float on my back. A night like tonight." Luke seemed to demonstrate, floating on his back a little, and Noah swam close. "I would think about stuff, and before I went to that awful camp, I would wonder about what it was like to be in love. To have a boyfriend. Someone to share things with, to take care of."
Luke suddenly reached out and touched Noah's shoulder."You've been so brave tonight, Noah, and it's my turn now. I need to tell you something that I've been holding back, as I've been afraid how you would take it. But see-that's my been my whole damn problem. I lived my life in fear, worrying about what people would say, and how I would be judged. I let fear send me to that camp, and it kept me silent when I married Maddie. But I'm not going to do that anymore."
Luke took a deep breath."I love you, Noah."
Noah tried to say something in return, but Luke covered his mouth with a wet hand." And right now-I don't want an answer. I just needed to let you know this, and say it out loud, although I think in your heart you knew it already. And baby, I understand about Charlie. How hard it is to let go, and how hurt and lonely you have been. What I want you to know is that I'm here. And that I'll wait until you're ready. I don't want to be just friends. I think we are both fooling ourselves when we call it that, what's between us. You are such a wonderful man, Noah-and you saved my life. "Luke brushed near, putting his arms over Noah's shoulders."Give me a chance to save yours."
Noah was completely frozen, and his heart seemed to bang hard in his ribs. This was truly terrifying, worse than his father dragging him out of bed in the middle of the night for a beating, worse than insurgent bullets whizzing over his head, worse than saying "I'm gay" out loud for the first time. He'd protected his broken heart for so long, he vowed he was done with the pain. But along with the fear came this other powerful feeling, one that he recognized, and had so far refused to put a name to. And he realized how much he had missed it, this overwhelming, dizzying joy. But he couldn't say it out loud-not just yet. Even though Luke was so beautiful, the most beautiful thing in the whole wide world.
He found Luke's waist and put his arms around him, so they were chest to chest, nose to nose.. "Okay, Luke. Okay." He kissed him, and Luke's mouth was soft and yielding, and full of such hope and promise. He suddenly smiled."God, baby-you are so fucking bossy."
"Yeah. I kinda am." Luke smiled back into his mouth and it was so sweet.
They just kissed for the longest time, until the sky got lighter, and they both were shivering. Then without warning, Luke dragged Noah out of the water, on to the shore. They grabbed at their clothes, and padded barefoot back to camp, smiling at each other and whispering like to kids sneaking down to steal a peek at the Christmas tree. When they got to their tent, Luke just threw his clothes on the ground and stepped out of his wet boxers as quick as you please. Noah gaped at the sight, of a wet, naked Luke, hard on snugged against his stomach, and the white flash of his perfect ass as he ducked into their tent. Noah got over his shock, and after glancing cautiously around, stepped out of his wet underwear as well, and fell headlong into the tent.
He was immediately pounced on. Luke's strong arms surrounded him and his hands were everywhere, stroking, exploring, playfully coaxing Noah's arousal. Noah found Luke's mouth in the dark, it was so warm and welcoming, and a contrast to their slick, lake cooled bodies. Soon that was mixed with sweat and heat, and cock met cock as their bodies struck sparks against each other. Noah found Luke's rapidly beating pulse as he nibbled and sucked on a arched neck, felt Luke's nipples pebble against his own chest, heard his soft sighs and moans in his ear.
Luke paused for a moment and pulled back a bit."Hold that thought sweetheart." he whispered, and Noah lay still, body now thrumming with anticipation, his heartbeat repeated in his now aching cock. He heard the sound of a zipper and Luke fumbling around in a one of their bags, and the telltale snap of a lube cap. He could make out Luke's silhouette as he poured some over his fingers. A few seconds later and those fingers were at his entrance, and while Noah was surprised, he yielded. There was a tiny bit of discomfort, as Luke hadn't done this very often, but Noah spread his legs, and kissed Luke's shoulder in encouragement. In another moment, Luke his his sweet spot and he bit back a loud groan, hoping to god he wouldn't wake up the whole camp ground. But the pleasure zinged up and down his body, and his dick was so hard now it almost hurt. He held on tight to Luke, fingers denting his skin.
"God Luke. Yessss." he gasped intot the crook of Luke's neck. Then he whimpered when those wonderful fingers were withdrawn. Luke petted him, "Just a minute, baby, just a minute." and then rolled a condom on to Noah's cock. He slopped a great deal of lube over it and then rolled Noah on his side.
Noah finally figured out finally what he was up to, and fumbled for the lube, but Luke was having none of that. "I want you now, Noah, now!" he said harshly, biting Noah's ear, then his neck, small teeth raising bruises. He wrapped a leg around Noah's waist, drawing him close and with one hand, guided Noah inside. Noah kept himself completely still, letting Luke adjust, shocked that the were doing it without prep. But Luke purred at him,'It's okay, Noah-feels so fucking good. I love the burn, I love your cock inside me. "Luke thrust downwards, making Noah gasp. "I love you, baby."
Noah didn't have any answering words, because he was beyond them, and they found a good, hard pounding rhythm. Noah buried his face in the crook of Luke's neck, one hand wrapped around his back, the other on his ass. Luke's hard on was wedged between their bodies, a hot brand that slicked up Noah's already wet stomach.
Luke was all around him, and urging him on, and while it was probably his imagination, he thought he could hear the rapid pound of Luke's heart. Luke moaned and there was another sound soon after, the wet, erotic sound of Luke stroking his own dick, knuckles brushing against Noah's skin."Love, love, love.."Luke crooned in a singsong voice,and then his body clamped tight around Noah's and he felt the wild tremors of Luke's orgasm, and the molten spurt of come. Noah gave one more quick thrust and lost himself in the white heat, and Luke.
He was dazed afterwards and felt Luke's soft kisses, which he returned. He also was able to help clean up a little, pulling off the condom and wiping away trails of sweat and come. He sighed when Luke finally snuggled close, head resting in the crook of his arm. "Love you Noah." Luke whispered, and Noah answered by kissing the top of his sweaty head. He drifted off, like he was floating down a river a on a raft.
When he woke up again it was morning, and he sun filtering through the tent touched Luke. He was curled up close and the light illuminated his hair, his soft lips, the lashes over his cheeks. The sight made Noah's heart ache. The light also caught Noah's dogtags, pooled on his chest.
He picked them up and looked at them, rubbing his thumb over the raised letters of Charlie's name. He sat up, and was about to pull the chain off his neck, then he froze. He couldn't. He just couldn't. Not yet. He felt tears sting his eyes, and he wiped them away. Then he lay back down next to Luke and pulled him close, letting the tears just flow. He fell back to sleep, with the bitter taste of them on his tongue.
Whoops! Almost forgot this-the park they are staying at is real:
http://www.oregonstateparks.org/park_134.php
Author: rebop13
Rating: NC17
Summary: Alternate universe, Luke is running away from something, Noah finds him. In this chapter, camping!
Disclaimer: Don't own, mean no harm, for fun.
Author's Note:For Moey Moe, and all my lovely Nukies
Noah took Highway 101, heading south. Driving fast was a mistake, as it was like an dropped spool of ribbon lying beside an incredible just unwrapped gift, the Oregon coast. And it truly was the best of presents, breathtaking and beautiful. When Noah first moved to Oregon, he'd been completely amazed to discover that the miles and miles of beaches were all public-no hotel or private residence could lay claim or block access. Although he'd become a bit used to it living so close, Luke's ecstatic reaction to it reminded him of just how wonderful it all was.
It was a gorgeous afternoon, and there were whitecaps scudding over the Pacific, and a sun warmed ocean breeze filled the truck interior. Luke looked happy and relaxed, blond hair blowing every which way, dark brown eyes sparkling in anticipation of their big adventure. As they drove, Noah felt himself unwind as well, and he had to admit again what a good idea this was.
They sang along to Noah's Van Morrison cd, and it was nice that Luke was learning the words to some of his favorite songs. Luke also was in major magpie mode, making curious comments about everything they drove by.
They went through the town of Waldport and over another spectacular WPA bridge, spanning the Alsea river. Luke loved odd place names, and he tried them out on his tongue, favoring the old native words-Tillicum, Wokanda and Suislaw. And the name Yachats, the small town where they stopped for coffee, really cracked him up.
"It's pronounced Ya-Hots, Luke." Noah teased as they pulled in to the parking lot. "Don't want you to embarrass yourself in front of the locals. You've been here too long to sound like a tourist."
"Really?" Luke grinned. "Well, I would like to point out that you locals are a tad touchy. I don't know how many times I was told to say, "ORYGUN" instead of, "Oregone"."
"Well, I assume you would correct me if I kept saying, "How wonderful it is to visit your lovely state of Ill-in-noise." Noah countered, starting to clamber out of the truck.
"Touche, Mayer." Luke chuckled for a moment, then he gave Noah a sudden very serious look, and gently grabbed his wrist. "You will, um, visit me-right? In my lovely state of Illinois?"
Noah swallowed hard, as this was something he didn't want to think about anymore. Luke actually leaving him, and being thousands of miles away. It caused an unexpected sharp, stabbing pain in his chest. "Of course, baby-of course I will." He leaned over and kissed his cheek.
Luke kissed him back, still pretty serious, and he seemed to be searching his face for something. "I'm so glad-and I will hold you to it, Noah." He said finally, and the soft look in his eyes made Noah's heart beat really fast. Then he playfully wagged Noah's chin, breaking the intensity. "Now let's go get that latte you have been jonesing for since Waldport."
Noah quietly followed him into the coffee shop, heart still in a turmoil. Remembering that Luke had a complicated life and a family to deal with, and that Noah and Towagh Bay was just a pit stop. He took a deep breath, and tried to concentrate on the here and now, and not worry about tomorrow.
It was going to come soon enough.
****
Lattes in cup holders, Noah drove to the town of Florence, where they made another quick stop at a small grocery. Noah stocked up on the camping basics: ice, milk, coffee, eggs, bread, bacon, hamburger and cheese, and made sure healthier food groups were represented-apples, oranges, fresh spinach, onions, tomatoes and green peppers. Luke, however, couldn't resist the junk food aisle, and Noah got to tease him about the strawberry pop and the Twizzlers. Still, at heart, a five year old, and Noah resisted an urge to kiss him senseless. Then he got irritated when Luke insisted on paying for all of it, and he somehow lost the argument. He was placated by a nice kiss in the truck that tasted suspiciously like a Twizzler.
Right outside Florence was a camp ground that the Triplehorns frequented, and that Noah had been to once-the Jessie M. Honeyman State Park. It was two miles inland from the ocean and was the beginning of the Oregon Dunes, a natural wonder that rivaled a scene from the Arabian Nights.
They were lucky, as there were camp sites to be had, as it was in the middle of the week. They were able to select one off the beaten path, with some privacy, but still within easy walking distance of Lake Cleawox. Honeyman consisted of two pristine lakes with sandy beaches, suitable for swimming and boating, and the camp sites themselves were nestled under tall, shady Sitka spruce. There were showers available and picnic tables, canoes for rent, and lodge with a fireplace. There were quite a few people there, but it wasn't overly crowded.
Luke was pretty excited about the park, and couldn't stop raving about it, so Noah felt he had made a good choice. They had fun setting up camp, something that Noah's neatnik, highly organized soul found deeply satisfying for some reason. It also brought back a few unwanted memories of the Colonel, but before he could brood about it, Luke had him in complete stitches over the camping disasters he'd experienced as a kid. He was accompanied in these adventures by his two best buddies. Casey and Will. Luke Snyder's Outdoor Exploits were an endless parade of collapsing tents, pouring down rain, forgotten equipment, Casey's unfortunate reaction to eating chili, and a garter snake in a sleeping bag. The best story was about Casey deciding to give the sleeping Luke and Will a big scare.
"So Case-never big on stealth-fumbles his way out of the tent, even stubbing his toe and cursing. I figured something was up, as normally Casey, once asleep, was completely dead to the world, and snored like a sixty year old man instead of a thirteen year old kid. I woke Will up, and we followed him outside,and we saw that he was putting on a Jason mask, from the Friday the 13th movies. Case was never big on subtle, either." Luke rolled his eyes, and Noah could just picture the scene.
"So, while the Frightmaster was getting ready to completely terrify us, I gave a signal to Will. Will always knew what I was thinking, and we both pulled our hoodies over our heads. We tiptoed behind Case, now in full out Jason Voorhees regalia, heading back to the tent. He was even giggling to himself, and god, Noah, it was so hard not to laugh."Luke eyes were bright and sparkling, totally into spinning his wonderful yarn." So, just as he was about to have his big moment, and was drawing back the tent flap, and I tapped him on the shoulder. He whirled around so fast the mask slipped off, and gave this little girly scream-"Luke demonstrated, and it sounded like a mouse singing tenor. " and not only ran over the tent, but I swear to god, he smacked right into a fucking tree. He knocked himself out."
Luke was now laughing so hard, there were tears in his eyes, and Noah wasn't far behind him. "You're kidding? Oh my god! He must have been sooo embarrassed."
"Oh, he was pissed. "Not fucking funny you guys!" he said over and over, which just made it worse. He had this big ol' giant goose egg on his head, and every time I looked at him, I about peed my pants." Luke wiped at his eyes." But Case was always a good sport, and after a while, he finally saw the humor in it. I still tease him about it..."Luke suddenly sobered, a wave of sadness covering his features."God..I miss him."
Noah's laughter completely died. He was almost envious of Luke, who seemed to have such a joyful, carefree childhood, so different from his own very lonely one. But then he realized how hard it would be to lose so many friends, something he never had to worry about. He threw an arm around Luke's shoulders."I'm so sorry, baby. And I get how much it hurts-but, you know-Casey going to be thinking about all this stuff too. All that you shared. Give him some time, Luke. He'll get there." Noah added, praying he was going to be right.
"Yeah." Luke said absently, eye far away.
Noah squeezed him tighter."Hey-here's a transparent ploy to distract you. How 'bout a swim before dinner? I brought along extra trunks. 'cuz I'm a devious bastard."
Luke shook off the gloom, and his eyes got bright again, and Noah began to realize how much he lived for that spark." Why, yes you are, Mr. Mayer. But I think I will go along with your nefarious scheme. "He then shocked Noah by patting his ass."Too bad we have to wear trunks though."
"Well, cold water might necessitate them if you were considering showing off your assets, Snyder. " Noah slyly teased back. "God, I've created a Frankenstein."
"Nah. Just a horndog." Luke leered and winked.
****
They changed into their trunks on the campground showers, and smeared sunscreen all over each other. He felt a bit self conscious being so undressed in public, although the baggy blue shorts he was wearing hid the worst scars. He took a deep breath and sucked it up, and realized most people weren't paying the slightest attention. The were too busy swimming or sunning themselves. It was a peaceful scene at Cleawox, some little kids and parents were playing and splashing at the shallow end, a few teenagers were doing cannonballs off a distant raft, a canoe scudded by, and a couple of seniors lay dozing, books on their chests. Luke and Noah spread out their towels and walked out into the water, which was just about perfect.
"Oh my god, this is sooo nice." Luke said happily, running out into deeper water. He began to swim, and glided along with total ease, like a graceful seal, Noah following close behind. It felt good, the weightlessness, although it did bring back the frustrating hours spent in the hospital therapy pool, trying to get his damaged leg to cooperate.
But that was a long time ago, and he forced himself back the present. He was swimming in tandem with a gorgeous man, whose skin was burnished a golden color by the late afternoon sun. Noah heard the words to 'Topleo Honey' ringing in his head, and they described Luke so well, sweet on the outside and on the inside. He was smiling wide, like a naughty, carefree kid, and he splashed Noah in the face and challenged him to a race, which he won handily. Noah could envision him easily as a boy now, wandering around his grandmother's farm in the high summer, barefoot and a little dirty, hair made blonder by the sun, chewing on a piece of hay.
They swam for almost an hour, until Noah heard Luke's stomach growl, even under the water. They both cracked up, and Noah suddenly realized how hungry he was too. Those cinnamon rolls were a long time ago. They left the lake as the sun was getting low, making the water turn a deep blue, and casting soft shadows. Towels slung over their shoulders, they wandered back to their camp, smelling woodsmoke and hamburgers being grilled. Luke's stomach growled again, even louder, and Noah couldn't stop laughing.
Luke decided to change in the tent, while Noah went back to the showers. It was just too hard for him to get dressed inside the confined tent space as his leg didn't bend terribly well. By the time he had returned to the camp, he saw that Luke had gotten everything ready, spreading out Annie's homemade bounty on their small picnic table. They ate and laughed, consuming an embarrassing amount of Annie's spinach quiche and sourdough bread, washing it all down with sweet tea. Noah couldn't remember a better meal, which was enhanced no doubt by the setting and the company.
Completely stuffed, they both slowly cleaned up, vowing to attack Annie's apple pie later. Noah made a fire, while Luke settled in a folding chair, with one of his books. When he finished, he sat down beside it, back supported by an old log, He was really starting to feel the effects of his early morning wake-up call, and he began feel very sleepy. When he was in the army, Noah learned how to doze even in the most uncomfortable of positions and situations. Pretty soon, he was out like a light.
When he woke up, it was dark, and he discovered he was now lying on his side, head cushioned by a rolled up sleeping bag. Luke was sitting close by, features bathed in the firelight. Noah yawned and felt somewhat embarrassed as he sat up, rubbing his eyes.
"Man-sorry. What terrible company. I didn't mean to fall asleep." Noah apologized, then nudged Luke with a shoulder." But thanks for the pillow."
"You're welcome-and don't apologize. You seemed pretty tired, and I was impressed you could nod off sitting up like that." Luke smiled.
"Something I learned on patrol. You take any opportunity to sleep when you can get it." Noah realized he really didn't want to follow this line of conversation, and switched subjects. "Any pie left?" he teased.
"I left you at least one piece." Luke shot back, smile widening.
Noah stretched a little, and decided that now would be a good time as any to give Luke his present. He wasn't sure how Luke would take it, and it scared him more than a little, but he knew in his heart that he needed to take a few more risks where Luke was concerned. He awkwardly stood up and limped over to the tent, pulling out his duffle bag.
"You turning in?" Luke asked quietly, a little disappointment in his voice.
"Nope. I got a second wind. Actually, I have something for you." Noah pulled out the gift that Helen had wrapped and another small box. "A, um, just because gift. " Noah returned to the fire, and handed Luke the wrapped present first.
Luke seemed both shocked and pleased."God Noah-you didn't have to do this!"
Noah sat down very close to Luke."Yes I did. C'mon, cowboy-open it."
Luke rewarded him with this huge, sweet smile and he ripped off the green and blue paper. Inside was a leather bound journal, with an elaborately hand tooled design in the outside. It was done in a style reminiscent of the tribes of the Northwest, and showed a stylized black and white bird perched on a pine tree. Noah couldn't believe how perfect it was when he saw it in Helen's shop. Luke didn't say anything, but traced the design with his fingers, and Noah panicked a little.
Shit. He hated it.
He began to babble."It's no big deal. I though it would be good for a diary, or, uh, something. You mentioned to me once about wanting to be a writer, and I figured you might put down some of those tall tales you've been telling me in it-about Oakdale, or god, that great story about Casey trying to scare you and Will. And I was hoping maybe it would remind you of your time in Oregon." Noah held on tight to the smaller box now, fingers trembling.
"Why a bird?" Luke finally said.
"Oh..it's silly. Charlie said people have a totem animal, and when I think of you, I think of um, a magpie."
"A magpie?" Luke finally looked up from the book and at him and Noah now saw he had tears standing in his eyes. " H-how come?"
'They are so smart and brassy and full of curiosity." Noah felt himself blushing, as it sounded sort of stupid when he said it out loud, and he was also shaken by Luke's tears. "They are also incredibly brave...like you."
"God. I love it. Thank you. I don't think I ever had a nicer present." Luke opened the book and saw the inscription that Noah had written on the fly leaf. He read it out loud, his voice cracking as Noah nervously gnawed his lower lip. " 'Sometimes you put you walls not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down. Noah' " Luke gazed at him for a few seconds, so much emotion on his face, it panicked Noah a little.
"This is something to go with it. I-I hope you don't mind me giving it to you." Noah stammered, thrusting the box at Luke. There was a sharp ache inside as he did it, but it was too late now to back out.
Luke wiped at his eyes, and reverently put the journal down before taking the box from Noah's now very obviously trembling hands. He opened the small black box and found a Waterman fountain pen, in a deep lacquered red.
Noah cleared his throat. "I guess I'm re-gifting a little. This... belonged to Charlie. I bought for him when we were in Paris, on leave. It was, um, the only present I ever gave him, and he didn't have much of a chance to use it."
Luke seemed to be taken completely aback." Noah...I can't take this-"
Noah abruptly cut him off. "Yes you can. Please, Luke. I realized something important, thanks to you, when you found Charlie's Fancy Dance costume under my bed. This pen was just sitting in a drawer in my desk. They are just things, yeah, but they were important to Charlie, and not meant to be hidden away, or locked up somewhere."
Noah suddenly noticed, with a start, that he was shaking all over."And...I guess I also need to let..let some of it go. Charlie loved that pen. You have a lot in common with him-you both are so good with words. He loved books, and it was his big dream to be a writer. I said this before, he would have really liked you, Luke. So I hope you use that pen, and think about him sometimes. He would be proud, and I would be too, if you use it to follow your dreams."
Luke's face was now completely wet with tears, and he pulled Noah in his arms. Noah rested his head on Luke's strong shoulder, and listened to Luke quietly cry. He envied those tears all of a sudden, as he knew deep down he had an ocean of them inside. But they wouldn't come. He just held tight to Luke, and tried to make his tremors go away.
"Thank you, Noah." Luke said softly, finally pulling back so he could look Noah in the eyes. "Thank you so much. I'll treasure that pen forever, and I promise to put it to good use." He gave Noah a very gentle kiss and it tasted like salt. "Hey-do you have a totem animal?" he asked, while cupping Noah's face with both hands.
"Yeah-Raven." Noah tried to smile."I think Charlie was just trying to tease me about my big nose."
"No, he wasn't." Luke said firmly. "I remember that story you told me when we first got together, about Raven stealing the sun from the chief, and letting the light out into the world. I can see the parallel. You hide so much of yourself, Noah. And maybe it's time to unlock that too, set it free..." He paused and gazed at Noah very steadily. "Noah..sweetheart...how did Charlie die?"
Oh no. God. Not that. Anything but that. Noah heard a roaring in his ears, and ice formed in his gut. He pulled away from Luke. "Why the fuck would you want to know?"
Luke didn't seem to be perturbed by his reaction. "Because I don't think you have ever really dealt with it. No family to grieve with-either yours or Charlie's. You've carried all this pain for so damn long Noah, and you have done it all alone. But-you aren't any more, Noah. You have me now, sweetheart."
Noah scrambled to his feet, causing a great deal of pain to shoot down his leg. He wanted to run, and get the hell out of there. Instead he nearly crashed into the tent. He thought about just driving off, but by then he stopped himself. He staggered over to a tree, and leaned against it, sure if he didn't, he'd fall over.
He heard Luke's soft, cautious footsteps behind him. "Noah-I am so, so sorry. I went too far, and I really upset you. Please forgive me. Please."
Noah didn't turn, just scraped at some bark with his thumb. He managed to find his voice, and it took everything he had to keep it steady. "I-I do. It's just...too hard, Luke. Okay? He died..saving my life. When I landed in the hospital, it took everything I had to want to keep on living. In fact, I tried to kill myself once." Noah took a breath, as this was something he had never spoken of outside an army hospital. "The only thing that stopped me is that the world lost someone special, and I was one of the last people who really knew him, and could honor his memory. But I guess I failed, as I haven't been able, up until now, to really say one fucking word. Not one. I'm too messed up."
Luke lightly touched his back."Noah-listen to me. You loved Charlie so much, and you have honored his memory. Maybe not in words, but how you live your life. And the Skookum-it's the most amazing monument ever, so much better than a marble statue or a foundation. But you're not marble, and you need to let yourself feel-and you can trust me, sweetheart. With everything."
Noah finally turned around, and Luke was gazing up at him with such warmth and compassion that the ice inside melted, and to his absolute shock, he felt some tears rolling down his face. They were the first he had shed since coming to Towagh Bay. He let go of the tree and fell into Luke instead, who held him up and let him cry. They were silent, hot tears, and each painful sob cut like a knife. But he somehow needed the hurt, and when he was finally done, he was near collapsing.
Luke gently led him to the tent, and they both crawled inside. Noah just curled up close, kitten weak. He hadn't expected this scenerio, and wasn't sure how he felt about it, his emotions were all over the place, and he felt naked and raw. But he did know one thing-he needed Luke, and was so glad that he was there. He fell asleep to the sound of Luke's steady breathing and the wonderful feel of his arms wrapped abound him tight.
****
It was hot, like the bottom of a frying pan, and there was acrid dust and smoke everywhere. Noah could smell his own sweat and fear, and there was a coppery scent of blood threatened to drown out most of it. There was nothing but bombed out buildings around him and Noah gripped his gun tight, knuckles white. He'd lost Luke. He'd fucked up and he'd lost Luke. He couldn't do anything goddamn right, just like the Colonel said.
He stepped in something slick, and realized he was walking through a pool of blood. It was streaming from an alley that seemed far too familiar. A sick, terrible feeling of dread washed over him. He didn't want to enter that alley, not ever, but his feet moved him forward.
He turned a corner and saw him sitting there-what was left of him. He was sitting on the ground, back against the wall, legs completely gone, just bloody, ragged stumps. Luke's beautiful face was so pale and so dead. Noah was too late and it was all his fucking fault, all his fucking,stupid fault. He should have died instead, not Charlie, not Luke, not-
Someone was shaking him awake. Noah gasped and panicked in the dark, completely disoriented. Strong hands soothed him. "Noah, Noah-it's okay. Shhh. You are having a nightmare. It's okay, baby. I'm here and it's okay."
Noah gulped in some air, eyes adjusting to the dark. He grabbed at Luke, to reassure himself that he was there and he was whole and alive. Warm solid flesh met his fingers, undamaged and unbloodied. It was just a bad fucking dream.
"I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up." Noah whispered, voice ragged. "I wasn't yelling or anything, was I?" he asked with a cringe.
Luke gently petted him. "No-you were just thrashing around. God, sweetheart, you're soaked."Noah licked his lips and tasted salt,and realized his t-shirt was stuck to him. "It's like you ran a marathon."
He experienced a wave of embarrassment over how much he seemed to be falling apart. "S-sorry."
" Don't be." Luke lightly stroke his face. "Want to talk about it?"
"In all honesty, not really." Noah answered, wanting desperately to erase the image of Luke's dead eyes from his head.
There was a brief pause and then Luke said quietly, "Hey-can I ask you a favor? Would you come with me?" And Noah hesitated, not wanting to do anything more than hold on to Luke and remain in a fetal position.
But Luke rarely asked him for anything. "Okay."
He could see the curved white of Luke's smile before he crawled out of the tent, and Noah shakily followed, leg knotted and groaning in protest. He had a hard time standing upright, but he managed, and he found Luke supporting him. The cool night air made his wet t-shirt stick to his skin, and he shivered. Luke's hand was rough and reassuring as it grabbed on to his, and Luke led his bewildered, still somewhat nightmare fogged self away from the camp site.
The rest of the park seemed to be in deep slumber, Noah could make out tent shapes and the glowing coals of low banked fires. The moon lit the narrow path they were on, finally reaching the edge of the lake. The only sound was the water lapping on the shore, and the wind rustling through the pines. In the sky, a few stars were scattered and the moon was hanging low-it was a perfect, perfect night.
Luke, to Noah's amazement, toed off his shoes and yanked his t-shirt over his head. He unzipped his shorts and with just his boxers on, waded out onto the lake, water past his calves. He held out his arms to Noah, and he found himself obeying as if hypnotized, awkwardly getting out of his jeans and sneakers, and letting his wet t-shirt fall to the ground. He walked towards Luke and the water was cool, but not freezing as he initially imagined. Luke grabbed his wrists and pulled him out further in the lake, until the water came up to their collarbones.
"I did a lot of night swimming when I was a teenager." Luke began, and Noah now recognized his storytelling voice. "My grandma has this big pond on her property and when I felt restless and sad,I would go down there. I loved it in the dark, with the sound of frogs, and the moon hanging like a big lantern overhead as I would float on my back. A night like tonight." Luke seemed to demonstrate, floating on his back a little, and Noah swam close. "I would think about stuff, and before I went to that awful camp, I would wonder about what it was like to be in love. To have a boyfriend. Someone to share things with, to take care of."
Luke suddenly reached out and touched Noah's shoulder."You've been so brave tonight, Noah, and it's my turn now. I need to tell you something that I've been holding back, as I've been afraid how you would take it. But see-that's my been my whole damn problem. I lived my life in fear, worrying about what people would say, and how I would be judged. I let fear send me to that camp, and it kept me silent when I married Maddie. But I'm not going to do that anymore."
Luke took a deep breath."I love you, Noah."
Noah tried to say something in return, but Luke covered his mouth with a wet hand." And right now-I don't want an answer. I just needed to let you know this, and say it out loud, although I think in your heart you knew it already. And baby, I understand about Charlie. How hard it is to let go, and how hurt and lonely you have been. What I want you to know is that I'm here. And that I'll wait until you're ready. I don't want to be just friends. I think we are both fooling ourselves when we call it that, what's between us. You are such a wonderful man, Noah-and you saved my life. "Luke brushed near, putting his arms over Noah's shoulders."Give me a chance to save yours."
Noah was completely frozen, and his heart seemed to bang hard in his ribs. This was truly terrifying, worse than his father dragging him out of bed in the middle of the night for a beating, worse than insurgent bullets whizzing over his head, worse than saying "I'm gay" out loud for the first time. He'd protected his broken heart for so long, he vowed he was done with the pain. But along with the fear came this other powerful feeling, one that he recognized, and had so far refused to put a name to. And he realized how much he had missed it, this overwhelming, dizzying joy. But he couldn't say it out loud-not just yet. Even though Luke was so beautiful, the most beautiful thing in the whole wide world.
He found Luke's waist and put his arms around him, so they were chest to chest, nose to nose.. "Okay, Luke. Okay." He kissed him, and Luke's mouth was soft and yielding, and full of such hope and promise. He suddenly smiled."God, baby-you are so fucking bossy."
"Yeah. I kinda am." Luke smiled back into his mouth and it was so sweet.
They just kissed for the longest time, until the sky got lighter, and they both were shivering. Then without warning, Luke dragged Noah out of the water, on to the shore. They grabbed at their clothes, and padded barefoot back to camp, smiling at each other and whispering like to kids sneaking down to steal a peek at the Christmas tree. When they got to their tent, Luke just threw his clothes on the ground and stepped out of his wet boxers as quick as you please. Noah gaped at the sight, of a wet, naked Luke, hard on snugged against his stomach, and the white flash of his perfect ass as he ducked into their tent. Noah got over his shock, and after glancing cautiously around, stepped out of his wet underwear as well, and fell headlong into the tent.
He was immediately pounced on. Luke's strong arms surrounded him and his hands were everywhere, stroking, exploring, playfully coaxing Noah's arousal. Noah found Luke's mouth in the dark, it was so warm and welcoming, and a contrast to their slick, lake cooled bodies. Soon that was mixed with sweat and heat, and cock met cock as their bodies struck sparks against each other. Noah found Luke's rapidly beating pulse as he nibbled and sucked on a arched neck, felt Luke's nipples pebble against his own chest, heard his soft sighs and moans in his ear.
Luke paused for a moment and pulled back a bit."Hold that thought sweetheart." he whispered, and Noah lay still, body now thrumming with anticipation, his heartbeat repeated in his now aching cock. He heard the sound of a zipper and Luke fumbling around in a one of their bags, and the telltale snap of a lube cap. He could make out Luke's silhouette as he poured some over his fingers. A few seconds later and those fingers were at his entrance, and while Noah was surprised, he yielded. There was a tiny bit of discomfort, as Luke hadn't done this very often, but Noah spread his legs, and kissed Luke's shoulder in encouragement. In another moment, Luke his his sweet spot and he bit back a loud groan, hoping to god he wouldn't wake up the whole camp ground. But the pleasure zinged up and down his body, and his dick was so hard now it almost hurt. He held on tight to Luke, fingers denting his skin.
"God Luke. Yessss." he gasped intot the crook of Luke's neck. Then he whimpered when those wonderful fingers were withdrawn. Luke petted him, "Just a minute, baby, just a minute." and then rolled a condom on to Noah's cock. He slopped a great deal of lube over it and then rolled Noah on his side.
Noah finally figured out finally what he was up to, and fumbled for the lube, but Luke was having none of that. "I want you now, Noah, now!" he said harshly, biting Noah's ear, then his neck, small teeth raising bruises. He wrapped a leg around Noah's waist, drawing him close and with one hand, guided Noah inside. Noah kept himself completely still, letting Luke adjust, shocked that the were doing it without prep. But Luke purred at him,'It's okay, Noah-feels so fucking good. I love the burn, I love your cock inside me. "Luke thrust downwards, making Noah gasp. "I love you, baby."
Noah didn't have any answering words, because he was beyond them, and they found a good, hard pounding rhythm. Noah buried his face in the crook of Luke's neck, one hand wrapped around his back, the other on his ass. Luke's hard on was wedged between their bodies, a hot brand that slicked up Noah's already wet stomach.
Luke was all around him, and urging him on, and while it was probably his imagination, he thought he could hear the rapid pound of Luke's heart. Luke moaned and there was another sound soon after, the wet, erotic sound of Luke stroking his own dick, knuckles brushing against Noah's skin."Love, love, love.."Luke crooned in a singsong voice,and then his body clamped tight around Noah's and he felt the wild tremors of Luke's orgasm, and the molten spurt of come. Noah gave one more quick thrust and lost himself in the white heat, and Luke.
He was dazed afterwards and felt Luke's soft kisses, which he returned. He also was able to help clean up a little, pulling off the condom and wiping away trails of sweat and come. He sighed when Luke finally snuggled close, head resting in the crook of his arm. "Love you Noah." Luke whispered, and Noah answered by kissing the top of his sweaty head. He drifted off, like he was floating down a river a on a raft.
When he woke up again it was morning, and he sun filtering through the tent touched Luke. He was curled up close and the light illuminated his hair, his soft lips, the lashes over his cheeks. The sight made Noah's heart ache. The light also caught Noah's dogtags, pooled on his chest.
He picked them up and looked at them, rubbing his thumb over the raised letters of Charlie's name. He sat up, and was about to pull the chain off his neck, then he froze. He couldn't. He just couldn't. Not yet. He felt tears sting his eyes, and he wiped them away. Then he lay back down next to Luke and pulled him close, letting the tears just flow. He fell back to sleep, with the bitter taste of them on his tongue.
Whoops! Almost forgot this-the park they are staying at is real:
http://www.oregonstateparks.org/park_134.php