Cruising/Chapter 12
Title: Cruising/ chapter twelve
Author: Rebop 13
Artist: pirl
Rating: Much NC-17ness. Yea!
Disclaimer: They aren't mine, but I own the lube.
Characters/Pairings: Luke, Noah, Ameera, Lucinda, many, many OC's
Word Count: Lots. Sorry, but my %&$#@ Mac writing program has no word count.
Warnings: Some angst. I mean, this is me.
Spoilers: None. We are way into AU land.
Summary: AU. Luke and Noah are emotionally blackmailed into going on a gay cruise. Romcom antics, misunderstandings, hot sex, schmoop, snappy dialogue and angst ensue. Also lots of lovely international scenery and fine cuisine.
Author’s Notes: OMG. Thank you Moey Mo for be so tolerant of my incredibly tardy ass. This thing came down to the wire, and for awhile, I didn't think I was going to make it. I am so grateful you didn't spank me and send me to my corner. Also pirl, for being both incredibly gracious, patient and talented-you rock so hard, you would scare Mick Jagger. I love Luke's cowboy stance and Noah's nose. And sorry to all my wonderful Nukies, who I've missed terribly. As usual, long story, but like a bad penny, I will continue to turn up. Hugs and smishings to all.
"I meant what I said.." Hugh began with a smile..
"And I said what I meant." Toby chimed in.
Hugh read the next line." An elephant's faithful…"
"ONE HUNDRED PERCENT!" Toby proclaimed loudly. He waved the little elephant puppet around, making it move it's soft cloth arms.
Luke was bustling about the room while Hugh and Toby were on the bed, reading from the battered story book. While they were occupied, he picked up toys and put scattered clothing into the closet. While he loved watching Hugh and Toby together, this moment brought him some serious pain. Giving Toby the little puppet had been a mistake, even though his son adored it. But it was a constant reminder of a terrible choice he had made, one that haunted him.
He left the room while the story continued and went into the kitchen. He thought about making coffee, then opted for tea. It sounded good after a particularly grueling day.
Toby's preschool class had a Halloween play, and Toby was delighted when he was chosen to play a pumpkin. But two hours beforehand, Luke couldn't find part of the costume-a viney green hat- and Toby had a hysterical meltdown. He and Hugh had turned the house upside-down before finding it in of all places, the vegetable crisper in the fridge. One of Toby's more inexplicable moves, although Hugh pointed out there was some actual logic to it. Luke figured he'd be amused later, as they were rushing like anything to get to the play on time.
They made it with only a few minutes to spare, and sat in a crowded room full of adoring families, all armed with recording devices. Toby cheerfully flubbed all his lines, and it didn't matter, because he was so damn cute.
They had warm punch and cookies afterwards, and then Toby got into an argument with a ghost about whose costume was better, so they had to leave early. They had pizza in with the grandparents, and by this time, Toby was bouncing off the walls, so they had to cut it short. Bath time led to another huge battle, but Toby finally calmed down when Hugh promised to read to him.
Luke filled the kettle with water, gazing out into the darkened back yard, wet with rain. He turned off the tap and stopped, staring at an object he'd put on the window ledge months ago. It was a small, perfect shell, light brown and white. Luke found himself picking it up, turning it over in his hand. Remembering that wonderful day on the beach, when Noah handed it to him.
He'd handed me his heart as well. And I let him go.
"You fixing coffee?" Luke jumped when Hugh entered the room and the shell slipped from his hand, dropping into the sink. Part of the tip broke off and Luke cursed.
He fished it out of the sink and hastily put the shell back on the ledge. He then marched over to the stove, and turned on burner, setting the kettle on top. "Actually, I'm making tea-Earl Grey sound okay?"
"Fine." Hugh went over to the window and picked up the shell, examining the broken top. "That's a shame."
Luke shrugged as he pulled a box of tea out of the cupboard. "It's just a fucking seashell. Put it back." He flushed suddenly, realizing how completely bitchy he sounded. "Sorry. That was uncalled for. Today was pretty brutal, and I shouldn't take it out on you."
Hugh gave him a rueful grin over his glasses. "Today was incredibly brutal, I agree. Who knew a pumpkin could be so high maintenance? They seem like such happy vegetables. I mean, they're orange. Fortunately, our Gourd of Terror is now sound asleep."
"Thank god." Luke chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck, which was stiff with tension.
"Hey-come here. Let me help with that." Hugh asked.
"Oh. Thanks." Luke obediently went over to Hugh, turning his back. Hugh's strong hands carefully massaged his shoulders and neck. Luke tried hard to relax under his ministrations.
"God, babe. You're like a marble sculpture." Hugh's tubs dug into his aching muscles."Take a deep breath and close your eyes." Luke complied, and it helped a bit. Then his tension ramped back up again when Hugh quietly said, "So-Toby asked me again when I was going to move in."
"Oh?" Luke's heart skipped several beats. "And what did you say?"
"That we were going to talk about it."
The kettle began to whistle, and Luke pulled away from Hugh to get it.
Hugh waited a moment before speaking again. "So- Luke? When are we going to talk about it?"
Luke avoided looking at him, and instead went to fetch some cups. "Maybe not right now."
"I don't think so. I think right now is the perfect time to discuss this." Hugh was using his lawyer voice, which always set Luke's teeth slightly on edge.
He turned and glared. "Am I getting cross-examined, counselor?"
Hugh didn't back down."If it will get you to finally discuss our the state of our relationship, yeah. And I'll finally lay my cards on the table-I'm tired of living in the apartment. I agreed to go slowly with everything, so not to confuse or upset Toby, but at this point, I'm wondering what's stalling things." Hugh frowned."Actually, I should amend that-I'm not wondering. I know this for a fact: You have cold feet."
Luke returned the frown. "Well, can you blame me?"
Hugh flinched a little."I deserve that. But I think I also deserve the truth, Luke."
Luke went cold all over. God, Hugh-don't ask this- please don't.
But Hugh wouldn't be Hugh if he didn't barrel ahead."Why did you pick me over Noah?"
Luke's jaw clenched. "I really don't want to go into this, Hugh."
"Well, not everything is under your control, Luke. And this is really important, because it's my life, and yours and Toby's." His handsome face became filled with sadness. "See, I suddenly figured something out a few weeks ago. Why I won out over a guy that you were apparently completely crazy about. At first I chalked it up to the grand romantic gesture I made, which really appealed to my ego. But I'd be a shitty lawyer if I didn't figure out the truth-that it actually had nothing to do with me and everything to do with Toby."
Luke was now gripping the mug so hard he was afraid it was going to break apart in his hands. "Hugh-that's not true."
"Luke, I love you, but you are a really awful liar. And actions speak louder than words. Since we've gotten back together, all we've talked about, dealt with, has been Toby. That's all we seem to have in common anymore." He sighed. "And a lot of this is on me. I was a lousy parent, and I ditched on my son. And you, you idiot, made this big sacrifice for Toby. To bring his father back into his life, make him happy."
Luke hung his head. "Hugh. God. I love you."
Hugh crossed the linoleum and took Luke's face in his hands, making him meet his eyes. "But are you in love with me, babe?"
"No." Luke finally said, in a voice so low it could barely be heard over the hum of the fridge. "No. I'm not." And it was such an incredible relief to finally say it out loud that Luke was almost dizzy.
Hugh gently rested his forehead against Luke's for a second. Then he let go. "Thank you for finally telling me the truth."
Luke placed the mug on the kitchen counter and wiped at his eyes. "So. Now what?" he asked in a cracked voice.
Hugh smiled bravely at him. " I continue to practice law in Oakdale. I get a bigger apartment, one with a room for Toby. I become a better parent and do all kinds of dad stuff. I mend my heart. And you stop mooning around and holding fucking seashells."
Luke felt like laughing and crying at the same time, so he did. "I-I really blew it, didn't I?"
"Yeah. You did. But I'm not exactly an innocent party. That would be Noah."
"I really hurt him, Hugh." Luke swallowed hard. "I don't know if he'll ever forgive me, or want to come back."
Hugh snorted. "Well, he's dealing with a Snyder. In all honesty, I don't think he has much of a chance."
****
Luke cautiously entered the small store with the unusual name, and was hit with a strong whiff of jasmine and sandalwood. He let his eyes adjust to the subdued light, and nervously glanced around. It was like a glittering, magical sorcerer's tent, inhabited, it seemed, by four felines. Three of them regarded him with boredom in their bright jeweled eyes, but the fourth, a chubby tabby, gave him a rusty, welcoming meow. Luke bent over and gave him a gentle pat behind the ears just as someone stepped out of the store's back room.
She was swathed in lace and indigo velvet, enough to make Stevie Nicks proud. Her blue eyes were soft and kind and enough like Noah's that they took his breath away.
"Hello. May I help you find anything?" She had a sweet voice, and it was charmingly tinged with a slight southern accent. When Luke hesitated, she asked, "Or are you here for a reading?"
"A reading?" Luke said blankly.
She gave him a small smile as she began to pet a tortoiseshell cat that was curled up in a jade colored bowl. "I read Tarot cards, palms and auras."
"Oh? Really? That seems incredibly interesting." Luke stammered. "I've-I've never had my palm read."
Her smile widened. "Well-want to give a whirl?"
Luke gave a nervous chuckle and found himself saying, "Yes. Sure."
"Let's go sit at the table over in the corner." She gestured at a little round table draped in black velvet, covered with silver stars. Luke unbuttoned his coat and sat down in a chair while Noah's aunt Ruth made herself comfortable opposite him."So, give me your hand, honey, and let's have a looksee."
Luke obeyed, and he realized his palm was sweating. She cradled his hand in one of hers, as delicately as you would a fragile egg, using an index finger decorated with a large ruby to trace the lines in his palm. "Hmm. You have a fire hand-that means you're creative and bright, as well as very passionate. Now your life line-well, darlin'-looks like you've had more than your fair share of troubles. As well as very good fortune. Your head line shows that you are imaginative, stubborn and impulsive. And now, the one folks seem to be most concerned with-the heart line. There's a big break here-" She tapped the center of his palm." But the rest of the line goes very deep. Right into the mount of Venus-the Evening Star." She looked up, right into his eyes. "You're searching for someone-aren't you, Luke?"
His jaw dropped and she laughed slightly, although it was also full of sadness." Oh, honey-I'm not that good. I saw you in one of Noah's pictures from the trip. You are even more gorgeous in person."
His face flushed. "Why didn't you tell me that you knew who I was?"
She tilted her head, studying him. "Wanted to have a little time to get your measure."
Luke realized that for all her New Age trappings, Luke wasn't dealing with some airy fairy eccentric-there was some real steel in in this woman's spine. "And what was your conclusion?" He finally asked, preparing for the worst.
"That you are a good man. Warm and charming and bright. Not surprising that my nephew fell head over heels in love with you." She traced a star on the tablecloth. "I also feel that while you didn't intend to, you broke his heart."
Luke took a deep breath. "I know I did. I made a choice-and it turned out to be the wrong one. Even though I did it for what I thought were the right reasons."
"Well, Noah explained the situation. And I think he understood, but it also tore him up. Again. He's had some terrible trials in matters of the heart, my poor love." She folded her bejeweled hands on the table. "So-I'm guessing the reason you are here is to find him- apparently, you didn't exchange phone numbers or addresses?"
"We somehow never got around to it while we were on the ship." Luke said." He's unlisted, but I had the choice between Terrible Trio Productions, or your very distinctively named shop to get a lead."
"And you picked me over the Trio, figuring the crazy old aunt would be a bit more receptive, since she was was the one that sent him on the cruise in the first place? And maybe campaign on your behalf?" Luke was a bit awestruck, as this was exactly what he'd been thinking. He was filled with sudden admiration, realizing these woman could give Lucinda a run for her money in the board room. He managed a slight nod.
"Well, you picked right. Ameera, in all honesty, would have your balls for earrings." She seemed a bit amused by Luke's resulting facial expression. "I, however, might be persuaded, Mr. Snyder. I didn't think this was over between the two of you, when Noah came back. However, I didn't think it was going to take you so long."
Luke sighed."I was a bit slow on that score. It took Hugh to point out how miserable I really was, and that I got back with him because of Toby."
"That stubborn line in your hand is pretty darn strong, I agree. But I have to warn you that Noah is too-and he's built up that big emotional wall again. You tough enough to try to get through it?"
"I have to be. I love him." Luke said simply.
She didn't say anything for a long moment. Then she reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out a pack of exotic looking cards. She shuffled through them and selected one, and wrote something down on it. "He's probably going kill me for doing this, but I'm an aunt and allowed to meddle." She handed Luke the card. It showed a nude woman pouring water from a vase into a lake, a glowing star over her head. Ruth had written an address at the top, and Luke's eyebrows raised, although he shouldn't have been surprised.
"Don't let me down, Luke. It's time for some healing, love and and happiness-don't you think?" She suddenly had tears in her eyes. "I think my sweet boy deserves that."
Luke stood up, and after a moment's hesitation, gave her a cautious kiss on the cheek. "Yes. He does."
****
The house was modest by LA standards, a light, airy stucco structure on one of the hills in West Hollywood. It had a beautiful front lawn crammed with tropical looking plants, including some towering banana trees. It seemed odd to be standing there in the bright sunshine, after being in the cold October weather in Chicago just hours before.
Luke walked up the brick walkway and stepped onto a foyer that was partially covered by a heavy clematis vine. He was shaking and his heart was racing a mile a minute. He'd checked his appearance a dozen times in the rental car, and did it once again in the glass fronted door. He was a little rumpled, but presentable, although his clothing was a bit too warm for the California heat. He then gathered all his courage and pressed the doorbell. After a few endless minutes, a woman about his age answered. She was casually dressed in a t-shirt that said, 'Kino Precision Lenses' and draw string pants, dark hair pulled back in a ponytail. She gave Luke a curious look. "Hello." she finally said.
Luke gave her what he hoped what his most disarming smile."Hi. I, uh, understand that Noah Mayer lives here?"
"Yes." her voice sounded cautious. "And you are…?"
"A friend of his. Luke."
Her dark eyes became very hard." Oh. I see. Y'know-I don't think so. As I don't think you qualify as a friend, or anything else. Bye." And with that, she slammed the door right in his face.
Luke just stood there, stunned. He thought he was prepared for anything, but not this. He thought about ringing the doorbell again, but he doubted it would do any good.
He turned and started to walk back to his car, trying to figure out his next move. Unfortunately, all of his ideas seemed like stalking. He turned again to look up at the house, trying to figure out where Noah was. As he did that, someone emerged from behind the house.
"Luke?" Roland Green blinked at him in surprise, from under a straw garden hat.
"Hey, Roland." Luke said quietly. "Really good to see you."
"Good to see you too, son." Roland took off his cloth work gloves and set his plant clippers down on a nearby bird bath. "So. How did you find us?"
"Aunt Ruth spilled the beans-after reading my palm." He added with a slight attempt at humor. If Roland sent him packing, Luke wasn't sure what he would do.
"I see. Well, Ruth is a wise woman. However, I don't guarantee a real warm reception."
"I already gathered that from the lady that answered the door." Luke said wryly.
Roland sighed. "Lord. Sorry. That was my daughter, Keisha. She really loves Noah, and is very protective. She also needs to know when to mind her own damn business. Which is why I'm going to ask you to follow me."
Luke thanked his lucky stars and followed Roland on a path beside the house, through a thick jungle of green. It led to a back yard patio dominated by an inevitable pool. There was also a little cottage, covered with more clematis."Noah's been renting my old caretaker's house." Roland explained softly. He then patted Luke's shoulder. "Good luck. Your'e going to need it."
"Thank you." Luke said sincerely. Roland left and Luke stepped further out onto the patio, trying to compose what he was he was going to say. That all flew out of his head when he heard a splash and saw Noah emerge from under the clear water of the pool. He shook his head, took a big gulp of air and swam to the shallow end, towards a ladder. He completely froze when he saw Luke standing there.
"Hey." Luke quietly said.
Noah seemed to shake himself. "Hey." His sapphire blue eyes never left Luke's as he slowly climbed out of the pool, wary as a wounded wolf. He was leaner than Luke remembered, and his skin was darkened with a light tan. But he was still a heartbreaking combination of boyish and sexy, almost too beautiful for words. Luke wanted to take him in his arms, but he didn't dare.
Instead, he walked a little closer and handed him a towel that was resting on one of the patio chairs. Noah took it from him, expression still unreadable. "Thanks." He wiped the water from his face, and then draped the towel across his shoulders. "So-how did you find me?"
Luke pulled the Tarot card that Ruth had given him from his pocket. Noah sighed when he saw it. "Shit. She's really not going to give up on all that destiny crap, is she?" His tone was angry and cynical, and suddenly fierce blue eyes bore into his. "Why the hell are you here, Luke?"
"To apologize. And tell you that I made an awful mistake."
Noah snorted. "I see. Things didn't go so well with Hugh after all, so now you decide to look me up? Thanks but no thanks, Luke. I'm sorry you've come all this way-you should have saved yourself the trouble. You should have just sent me a letter."
"What I have to say needed to be face to face, Noah." Luke stood his ground. "Give me at least a couple of minutes. Then, if you want, I'll be out of your hair for good."
Noah's jaw visibly clenched, he looked like he was having a fierce internal debate. To Luke's relief, he finally gave a curt nod. "Okay. You have the floor."
Luke made himself look at Noah directly in the eyes."I love you, Noah. I think I pretty much fell for you the day after we met. But I was too fucked up because of Hugh, and scared to get hurt again. It just all happened so damn fast-I didn't trust it, when I should have jumped in with both feet. And then when Hugh showed up, I admit-I was blown away. He was saying all the things I wanted him to say for two long years, and there was a weak, selfish part of me that really needed that."
Luke paused for a few seconds, collecting his thoughts. "But that wasn't the only reason, Noah. There was Toby. He missed Hugh so much, and deep down, I chose him because I figured that would finally give Toby the two parents he deserved. One of the many mistakes I made that day was not telling you how damn hard it was to come to that decision, or why. Honestly, I didn't realize it myself. I know I hurt you badly, Noah-I'll never forgive myself for that. And I knew I had made the worst mistake of my life when we got back to Oakdale."
Luke swallowed hard. "I realized I wasn't in love with him anymore. I will always care about him, but he's not you, Noah. He doesn't get me like you do-in fact, you are the only person that ever has. I loved being with you, seeing the world through your eyes, hearing your opinions, sharing everything. You're so smart and adorable and sweet. With Hugh, all we ended up doing is talking about Toby. I think we actually bore each other."
Noah finally spoke."And how did poor Hugh take this big revelation?" he asked coldly.
"He's the one that pointed it out, as I was in too much denial to admit it. He practically pushed me out the door. He's a good guy, Noah. But he's not the love of my life-you are. And I am so fucking sorry that it's taken me this long to tell you that."
There was a long moment of silence. Then Noah said," I'm sorry too." He turned away. "Go home, Luke."
Luke was shocked and hurt, then angry. He followed Noah, who was heading toward the cottage. "That's it? That's all you're going to say? 'Go home'? What are you feeling right now?"
Noah whirled around, eyes now blazing with anger."That you have a lot of fucking nerve! Showing up out of the blue and asking, 'What am I feeling right now?' How about I'm scared that my heart's about to be ripped out of my chest again by you! And I can't take it, Luke! It's taken me a couple months to get to the point where I want to feel like getting out of the bed every morning. For awhile, all I could think about was you, and I couldn't sleep or eat. Finally my aunt made me call Roland to ask if I could stay with him awhile, and thank god I did. I'm trying to make a new life for myself, one that's was far away from you and fucking Oakdale as I could possibly get! Do you have any idea how hard it was not to drive down there and try to to see you again, beg you to take me back? But I have some pride, Luke-contrary to what you might think. I'm not going to be your goddamn boyfriend by default because you were too fucking gutless to tell me how you really felt! So fuck off, and like I said, go home!"
Luke was silent under this verbal tirade, feeling a bit like he'd gotten his eyebrows singed off. He watched Noah storm into the cottage, slamming the door so hard that he was surprised it didn't fall off it's hinges. He closed his eyes for a moment, and then, with great determination, followed Noah into the cottage.
Noah was standing there, hugging the wet towel close to himself, face flushed, body shaking. He opened his mouth to yell, but Luke cut him off.
"I'll go, but one last thing-say that you don't love me anymore."
"FUCK YOU!" Noah's roar made the walls rattle.
"The last time I saw you Noah, you said that you loved me more than your own life. That doesn't just go away, no matter how angry you are at me. So say that you don't love me anymore, and it's finally over."
"Fuck you." Noah whispered, eyes filling with tears.
Luke grabbed him and shoved him against the wall. "Look me in the eyes, baby, and say you don't love me anymore."
"I can't." Noah was now crying, and so was Luke.
"Why not?" Luke's face was now inches away from Noah's.
"Because I fucking LOVE you, that's why." Noah sobbed. "I never stopped."
Then Noah kissed him. It was wet and desperate and tasted of chlorine and salt and their teeth painfully clashed. "I love you, I love you, I love you!" Luke managed to gasp out before kissing him again and again. Noah hugged him so tightly that Luke thought his ribs might crack, and he couldn't really breathe. He didn't care. If he died right now, he would be completely happy.
They kissed and moaned and then Noah half walked, half dragged him into another room, one with a narrow bed. They both collapsed on top of it, making the headboard smack hard against the wall. Luke felt dazed and crazy, it seemed impossible that this was happening so soon after they were both screaming at each other, but he wasn't about to put on the brakes. Each kiss became harder and fiercer than the last, and they tore at each other's clothing. Noah's body was still wet and cool from the pool, but after Luke yanked down his trunks he found his erect cock hotter than a fiery brand. He roughly stroked it, making Noah writhe and moan in his arms. Noah in turn ripped off Luke's sweaty shirt, scattering buttons everywhere, biting his neck, his shoulder, a nipple.
Noah unbuckled Luke's belt and sent in flying halfway across the room, while Luke unzipped his too tight jeans. Noah shoved denim and jockey shorts over Luke's ass, and whispered hoarsely in his ear, "Condoms are in the night stand." Luke looked around, knocking a book on the floor as he opened a drawer. He fumbled around, finding a Trojan, which Noah snatched from his hand. He tore it open with his teeth and then rolled it on Luke's leaking erection. "I want you fucking NOW!" Noah gasped in his ear.
Luke hesitated, as the last thing he wanted to do was hurt Noah. Noah gave a grunt of frustration and threw his long legs over Luke's shoulders. "Now!" he begged, face smeared with tears and sweat. "Please, Luke-please!"
Luke couldn't stop himself at this point. He found Noah's tight little hole and slid halfway in. Noah arched his back, making a noise that sounded like both pain and ecstasy. He grabbed Luke's ass, pulling him balls deep.
"Oh, GOD Noah!" Luke's sweat dripped on Noah's tanned belly. He was so tight, his lover, and face held every emotion imaginable-love, happiness, sadness, mixed with lust and a tiny bit of fear. Noah was giving him everything at this moment, he'd cracked open wide. Luke was so hard now he knew he wasn't going to last very long. He grabbed Noah's rigid wet cock and fisted it in time to his short, brutal thrusts. Noah howled and his cock pulsed and jumped in Luke's hands, come shooting everywhere, the sheets, Noah's stomach, Luke's chest. Luke followed his lover a second later, letting his climax blow through him like a hurricane.
He melted on top of Noah, who wrapped him up tight. For awhile, all Luke could do was breath and listen to the thump,thump thump of Noah's heart. Noah, in turn, kissed the top of Luke's head, running shaking fingers through his hair.
They were silent for a long while. Luke finally started to cramp a little and pulled out. He yanked off the condom, tying it off, then panicked a little when he saw blood spotting the sheets. "Shit! Noah-god, I hurt you." He wanted to bawl like a baby.
Noah covered his mouth with his hand. "Sssh. I wanted it to hurt. I was cold and angry and numb for so long. I needed this. I needed you." Fresh tears sprang into his eyes and he wiped them away with his fingers. Then he sighed, and gave Luke one of his old, crooked smiles, that pierced Luke's heart, as it was so sad. "This doesn't really change anything, you know."
Luke frowned. "What do you mean? It changes everything. I love you, and you love me, Noah. The rest is all details."
"Is Toby a detail?" Noah asked quietly. "My life is out here now, Luke, in LA. That's the one good thing that's come out of this whole fiasco. I finally said 'fuck it' to commercials, and sold my part of Terrible Trio to Danny and Ameera. I came out here to see if I could be a real director. So far, so good. I'm working on a script with Roland,and we have a couple of studios really interested. I'm also lined up to direct a little indie movie in the end of November up in Vancouver."
Luke's heart sank for a moment, even though he was happy for Noah's success. But then he decided to look the whole thing right in the eye. He brushed some sweaty hair from Noah's forehead. "I am so damn proud of you, baby." He gave him a soft kiss and jumped in. "And I also think Toby will love living in LA."
Noah narrowed his eyes and sat up."Luke-you can't do that. One of the reasons this all happened is that you wanted Hugh back in Toby's life."
"I honestly think that Mr. McClellan will be much, much happier in LA than in teeny, boring old Oakdale. He's a big city guy." Luke said confidently. "We can work it out. Hugh's stepping up to the plate big time."
Noah's face was still covered in disbelief. "What about the rest of your family?"
"My grandmother owns a damn private jet. They can come out and and we can all go to Disneyland."
Noah stared at him. "You-you really want to do this?"
"Yes." Luke said softly. "More than anything. I want this little dramady of ours to have the happiest ending, Noah. I want it corny as hell. I want to buy some big bungalow in Glendale, and I'll write and you'll direct. We'll work on scripts together and have barbecues in the back yard. I want you to watch movies with Tobe and take him to the park. I want lazy afternoons where we lie around the house all day reading the Sunday paper. I want a big sleepy dog that will play ball with Toby. And I want to bore friends and family with the all the pictures from our cruise, telling over and over the crazy way we first met, so very 'meet cute'. Think we can do that?"
Noah looked away for a moment, then he gazed Luke full in the face, giving him his biggest, dorkiest, most wonderful smile.
"Yeah. I think we can." Noah leaned forward and kissed him. There was a light in his eyes now that had been missing. "Now we can cue the music and roll the credits."
Luke happily laughed and pushed him back on the bed. "And makes plans for the sequel."
Author: Rebop 13
Artist: pirl
Rating: Much NC-17ness. Yea!
Disclaimer: They aren't mine, but I own the lube.
Characters/Pairings: Luke, Noah, Ameera, Lucinda, many, many OC's
Word Count: Lots. Sorry, but my %&$#@ Mac writing program has no word count.
Warnings: Some angst. I mean, this is me.
Spoilers: None. We are way into AU land.
Summary: AU. Luke and Noah are emotionally blackmailed into going on a gay cruise. Romcom antics, misunderstandings, hot sex, schmoop, snappy dialogue and angst ensue. Also lots of lovely international scenery and fine cuisine.
Author’s Notes: OMG. Thank you Moey Mo for be so tolerant of my incredibly tardy ass. This thing came down to the wire, and for awhile, I didn't think I was going to make it. I am so grateful you didn't spank me and send me to my corner. Also pirl, for being both incredibly gracious, patient and talented-you rock so hard, you would scare Mick Jagger. I love Luke's cowboy stance and Noah's nose. And sorry to all my wonderful Nukies, who I've missed terribly. As usual, long story, but like a bad penny, I will continue to turn up. Hugs and smishings to all.
"I meant what I said.." Hugh began with a smile..
"And I said what I meant." Toby chimed in.
Hugh read the next line." An elephant's faithful…"
"ONE HUNDRED PERCENT!" Toby proclaimed loudly. He waved the little elephant puppet around, making it move it's soft cloth arms.
Luke was bustling about the room while Hugh and Toby were on the bed, reading from the battered story book. While they were occupied, he picked up toys and put scattered clothing into the closet. While he loved watching Hugh and Toby together, this moment brought him some serious pain. Giving Toby the little puppet had been a mistake, even though his son adored it. But it was a constant reminder of a terrible choice he had made, one that haunted him.
He left the room while the story continued and went into the kitchen. He thought about making coffee, then opted for tea. It sounded good after a particularly grueling day.
Toby's preschool class had a Halloween play, and Toby was delighted when he was chosen to play a pumpkin. But two hours beforehand, Luke couldn't find part of the costume-a viney green hat- and Toby had a hysterical meltdown. He and Hugh had turned the house upside-down before finding it in of all places, the vegetable crisper in the fridge. One of Toby's more inexplicable moves, although Hugh pointed out there was some actual logic to it. Luke figured he'd be amused later, as they were rushing like anything to get to the play on time.
They made it with only a few minutes to spare, and sat in a crowded room full of adoring families, all armed with recording devices. Toby cheerfully flubbed all his lines, and it didn't matter, because he was so damn cute.
They had warm punch and cookies afterwards, and then Toby got into an argument with a ghost about whose costume was better, so they had to leave early. They had pizza in with the grandparents, and by this time, Toby was bouncing off the walls, so they had to cut it short. Bath time led to another huge battle, but Toby finally calmed down when Hugh promised to read to him.
Luke filled the kettle with water, gazing out into the darkened back yard, wet with rain. He turned off the tap and stopped, staring at an object he'd put on the window ledge months ago. It was a small, perfect shell, light brown and white. Luke found himself picking it up, turning it over in his hand. Remembering that wonderful day on the beach, when Noah handed it to him.
He'd handed me his heart as well. And I let him go.
"You fixing coffee?" Luke jumped when Hugh entered the room and the shell slipped from his hand, dropping into the sink. Part of the tip broke off and Luke cursed.
He fished it out of the sink and hastily put the shell back on the ledge. He then marched over to the stove, and turned on burner, setting the kettle on top. "Actually, I'm making tea-Earl Grey sound okay?"
"Fine." Hugh went over to the window and picked up the shell, examining the broken top. "That's a shame."
Luke shrugged as he pulled a box of tea out of the cupboard. "It's just a fucking seashell. Put it back." He flushed suddenly, realizing how completely bitchy he sounded. "Sorry. That was uncalled for. Today was pretty brutal, and I shouldn't take it out on you."
Hugh gave him a rueful grin over his glasses. "Today was incredibly brutal, I agree. Who knew a pumpkin could be so high maintenance? They seem like such happy vegetables. I mean, they're orange. Fortunately, our Gourd of Terror is now sound asleep."
"Thank god." Luke chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck, which was stiff with tension.
"Hey-come here. Let me help with that." Hugh asked.
"Oh. Thanks." Luke obediently went over to Hugh, turning his back. Hugh's strong hands carefully massaged his shoulders and neck. Luke tried hard to relax under his ministrations.
"God, babe. You're like a marble sculpture." Hugh's tubs dug into his aching muscles."Take a deep breath and close your eyes." Luke complied, and it helped a bit. Then his tension ramped back up again when Hugh quietly said, "So-Toby asked me again when I was going to move in."
"Oh?" Luke's heart skipped several beats. "And what did you say?"
"That we were going to talk about it."
The kettle began to whistle, and Luke pulled away from Hugh to get it.
Hugh waited a moment before speaking again. "So- Luke? When are we going to talk about it?"
Luke avoided looking at him, and instead went to fetch some cups. "Maybe not right now."
"I don't think so. I think right now is the perfect time to discuss this." Hugh was using his lawyer voice, which always set Luke's teeth slightly on edge.
He turned and glared. "Am I getting cross-examined, counselor?"
Hugh didn't back down."If it will get you to finally discuss our the state of our relationship, yeah. And I'll finally lay my cards on the table-I'm tired of living in the apartment. I agreed to go slowly with everything, so not to confuse or upset Toby, but at this point, I'm wondering what's stalling things." Hugh frowned."Actually, I should amend that-I'm not wondering. I know this for a fact: You have cold feet."
Luke returned the frown. "Well, can you blame me?"
Hugh flinched a little."I deserve that. But I think I also deserve the truth, Luke."
Luke went cold all over. God, Hugh-don't ask this- please don't.
But Hugh wouldn't be Hugh if he didn't barrel ahead."Why did you pick me over Noah?"
Luke's jaw clenched. "I really don't want to go into this, Hugh."
"Well, not everything is under your control, Luke. And this is really important, because it's my life, and yours and Toby's." His handsome face became filled with sadness. "See, I suddenly figured something out a few weeks ago. Why I won out over a guy that you were apparently completely crazy about. At first I chalked it up to the grand romantic gesture I made, which really appealed to my ego. But I'd be a shitty lawyer if I didn't figure out the truth-that it actually had nothing to do with me and everything to do with Toby."
Luke was now gripping the mug so hard he was afraid it was going to break apart in his hands. "Hugh-that's not true."
"Luke, I love you, but you are a really awful liar. And actions speak louder than words. Since we've gotten back together, all we've talked about, dealt with, has been Toby. That's all we seem to have in common anymore." He sighed. "And a lot of this is on me. I was a lousy parent, and I ditched on my son. And you, you idiot, made this big sacrifice for Toby. To bring his father back into his life, make him happy."
Luke hung his head. "Hugh. God. I love you."
Hugh crossed the linoleum and took Luke's face in his hands, making him meet his eyes. "But are you in love with me, babe?"
"No." Luke finally said, in a voice so low it could barely be heard over the hum of the fridge. "No. I'm not." And it was such an incredible relief to finally say it out loud that Luke was almost dizzy.
Hugh gently rested his forehead against Luke's for a second. Then he let go. "Thank you for finally telling me the truth."
Luke placed the mug on the kitchen counter and wiped at his eyes. "So. Now what?" he asked in a cracked voice.
Hugh smiled bravely at him. " I continue to practice law in Oakdale. I get a bigger apartment, one with a room for Toby. I become a better parent and do all kinds of dad stuff. I mend my heart. And you stop mooning around and holding fucking seashells."
Luke felt like laughing and crying at the same time, so he did. "I-I really blew it, didn't I?"
"Yeah. You did. But I'm not exactly an innocent party. That would be Noah."
"I really hurt him, Hugh." Luke swallowed hard. "I don't know if he'll ever forgive me, or want to come back."
Hugh snorted. "Well, he's dealing with a Snyder. In all honesty, I don't think he has much of a chance."
****
Luke cautiously entered the small store with the unusual name, and was hit with a strong whiff of jasmine and sandalwood. He let his eyes adjust to the subdued light, and nervously glanced around. It was like a glittering, magical sorcerer's tent, inhabited, it seemed, by four felines. Three of them regarded him with boredom in their bright jeweled eyes, but the fourth, a chubby tabby, gave him a rusty, welcoming meow. Luke bent over and gave him a gentle pat behind the ears just as someone stepped out of the store's back room.
She was swathed in lace and indigo velvet, enough to make Stevie Nicks proud. Her blue eyes were soft and kind and enough like Noah's that they took his breath away.
"Hello. May I help you find anything?" She had a sweet voice, and it was charmingly tinged with a slight southern accent. When Luke hesitated, she asked, "Or are you here for a reading?"
"A reading?" Luke said blankly.
She gave him a small smile as she began to pet a tortoiseshell cat that was curled up in a jade colored bowl. "I read Tarot cards, palms and auras."
"Oh? Really? That seems incredibly interesting." Luke stammered. "I've-I've never had my palm read."
Her smile widened. "Well-want to give a whirl?"
Luke gave a nervous chuckle and found himself saying, "Yes. Sure."
"Let's go sit at the table over in the corner." She gestured at a little round table draped in black velvet, covered with silver stars. Luke unbuttoned his coat and sat down in a chair while Noah's aunt Ruth made herself comfortable opposite him."So, give me your hand, honey, and let's have a looksee."
Luke obeyed, and he realized his palm was sweating. She cradled his hand in one of hers, as delicately as you would a fragile egg, using an index finger decorated with a large ruby to trace the lines in his palm. "Hmm. You have a fire hand-that means you're creative and bright, as well as very passionate. Now your life line-well, darlin'-looks like you've had more than your fair share of troubles. As well as very good fortune. Your head line shows that you are imaginative, stubborn and impulsive. And now, the one folks seem to be most concerned with-the heart line. There's a big break here-" She tapped the center of his palm." But the rest of the line goes very deep. Right into the mount of Venus-the Evening Star." She looked up, right into his eyes. "You're searching for someone-aren't you, Luke?"
His jaw dropped and she laughed slightly, although it was also full of sadness." Oh, honey-I'm not that good. I saw you in one of Noah's pictures from the trip. You are even more gorgeous in person."
His face flushed. "Why didn't you tell me that you knew who I was?"
She tilted her head, studying him. "Wanted to have a little time to get your measure."
Luke realized that for all her New Age trappings, Luke wasn't dealing with some airy fairy eccentric-there was some real steel in in this woman's spine. "And what was your conclusion?" He finally asked, preparing for the worst.
"That you are a good man. Warm and charming and bright. Not surprising that my nephew fell head over heels in love with you." She traced a star on the tablecloth. "I also feel that while you didn't intend to, you broke his heart."
Luke took a deep breath. "I know I did. I made a choice-and it turned out to be the wrong one. Even though I did it for what I thought were the right reasons."
"Well, Noah explained the situation. And I think he understood, but it also tore him up. Again. He's had some terrible trials in matters of the heart, my poor love." She folded her bejeweled hands on the table. "So-I'm guessing the reason you are here is to find him- apparently, you didn't exchange phone numbers or addresses?"
"We somehow never got around to it while we were on the ship." Luke said." He's unlisted, but I had the choice between Terrible Trio Productions, or your very distinctively named shop to get a lead."
"And you picked me over the Trio, figuring the crazy old aunt would be a bit more receptive, since she was was the one that sent him on the cruise in the first place? And maybe campaign on your behalf?" Luke was a bit awestruck, as this was exactly what he'd been thinking. He was filled with sudden admiration, realizing these woman could give Lucinda a run for her money in the board room. He managed a slight nod.
"Well, you picked right. Ameera, in all honesty, would have your balls for earrings." She seemed a bit amused by Luke's resulting facial expression. "I, however, might be persuaded, Mr. Snyder. I didn't think this was over between the two of you, when Noah came back. However, I didn't think it was going to take you so long."
Luke sighed."I was a bit slow on that score. It took Hugh to point out how miserable I really was, and that I got back with him because of Toby."
"That stubborn line in your hand is pretty darn strong, I agree. But I have to warn you that Noah is too-and he's built up that big emotional wall again. You tough enough to try to get through it?"
"I have to be. I love him." Luke said simply.
She didn't say anything for a long moment. Then she reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out a pack of exotic looking cards. She shuffled through them and selected one, and wrote something down on it. "He's probably going kill me for doing this, but I'm an aunt and allowed to meddle." She handed Luke the card. It showed a nude woman pouring water from a vase into a lake, a glowing star over her head. Ruth had written an address at the top, and Luke's eyebrows raised, although he shouldn't have been surprised.
"Don't let me down, Luke. It's time for some healing, love and and happiness-don't you think?" She suddenly had tears in her eyes. "I think my sweet boy deserves that."
Luke stood up, and after a moment's hesitation, gave her a cautious kiss on the cheek. "Yes. He does."
****
The house was modest by LA standards, a light, airy stucco structure on one of the hills in West Hollywood. It had a beautiful front lawn crammed with tropical looking plants, including some towering banana trees. It seemed odd to be standing there in the bright sunshine, after being in the cold October weather in Chicago just hours before.
Luke walked up the brick walkway and stepped onto a foyer that was partially covered by a heavy clematis vine. He was shaking and his heart was racing a mile a minute. He'd checked his appearance a dozen times in the rental car, and did it once again in the glass fronted door. He was a little rumpled, but presentable, although his clothing was a bit too warm for the California heat. He then gathered all his courage and pressed the doorbell. After a few endless minutes, a woman about his age answered. She was casually dressed in a t-shirt that said, 'Kino Precision Lenses' and draw string pants, dark hair pulled back in a ponytail. She gave Luke a curious look. "Hello." she finally said.
Luke gave her what he hoped what his most disarming smile."Hi. I, uh, understand that Noah Mayer lives here?"
"Yes." her voice sounded cautious. "And you are…?"
"A friend of his. Luke."
Her dark eyes became very hard." Oh. I see. Y'know-I don't think so. As I don't think you qualify as a friend, or anything else. Bye." And with that, she slammed the door right in his face.
Luke just stood there, stunned. He thought he was prepared for anything, but not this. He thought about ringing the doorbell again, but he doubted it would do any good.
He turned and started to walk back to his car, trying to figure out his next move. Unfortunately, all of his ideas seemed like stalking. He turned again to look up at the house, trying to figure out where Noah was. As he did that, someone emerged from behind the house.
"Luke?" Roland Green blinked at him in surprise, from under a straw garden hat.
"Hey, Roland." Luke said quietly. "Really good to see you."
"Good to see you too, son." Roland took off his cloth work gloves and set his plant clippers down on a nearby bird bath. "So. How did you find us?"
"Aunt Ruth spilled the beans-after reading my palm." He added with a slight attempt at humor. If Roland sent him packing, Luke wasn't sure what he would do.
"I see. Well, Ruth is a wise woman. However, I don't guarantee a real warm reception."
"I already gathered that from the lady that answered the door." Luke said wryly.
Roland sighed. "Lord. Sorry. That was my daughter, Keisha. She really loves Noah, and is very protective. She also needs to know when to mind her own damn business. Which is why I'm going to ask you to follow me."
Luke thanked his lucky stars and followed Roland on a path beside the house, through a thick jungle of green. It led to a back yard patio dominated by an inevitable pool. There was also a little cottage, covered with more clematis."Noah's been renting my old caretaker's house." Roland explained softly. He then patted Luke's shoulder. "Good luck. Your'e going to need it."
"Thank you." Luke said sincerely. Roland left and Luke stepped further out onto the patio, trying to compose what he was he was going to say. That all flew out of his head when he heard a splash and saw Noah emerge from under the clear water of the pool. He shook his head, took a big gulp of air and swam to the shallow end, towards a ladder. He completely froze when he saw Luke standing there.
"Hey." Luke quietly said.
Noah seemed to shake himself. "Hey." His sapphire blue eyes never left Luke's as he slowly climbed out of the pool, wary as a wounded wolf. He was leaner than Luke remembered, and his skin was darkened with a light tan. But he was still a heartbreaking combination of boyish and sexy, almost too beautiful for words. Luke wanted to take him in his arms, but he didn't dare.
Instead, he walked a little closer and handed him a towel that was resting on one of the patio chairs. Noah took it from him, expression still unreadable. "Thanks." He wiped the water from his face, and then draped the towel across his shoulders. "So-how did you find me?"
Luke pulled the Tarot card that Ruth had given him from his pocket. Noah sighed when he saw it. "Shit. She's really not going to give up on all that destiny crap, is she?" His tone was angry and cynical, and suddenly fierce blue eyes bore into his. "Why the hell are you here, Luke?"
"To apologize. And tell you that I made an awful mistake."
Noah snorted. "I see. Things didn't go so well with Hugh after all, so now you decide to look me up? Thanks but no thanks, Luke. I'm sorry you've come all this way-you should have saved yourself the trouble. You should have just sent me a letter."
"What I have to say needed to be face to face, Noah." Luke stood his ground. "Give me at least a couple of minutes. Then, if you want, I'll be out of your hair for good."
Noah's jaw visibly clenched, he looked like he was having a fierce internal debate. To Luke's relief, he finally gave a curt nod. "Okay. You have the floor."
Luke made himself look at Noah directly in the eyes."I love you, Noah. I think I pretty much fell for you the day after we met. But I was too fucked up because of Hugh, and scared to get hurt again. It just all happened so damn fast-I didn't trust it, when I should have jumped in with both feet. And then when Hugh showed up, I admit-I was blown away. He was saying all the things I wanted him to say for two long years, and there was a weak, selfish part of me that really needed that."
Luke paused for a few seconds, collecting his thoughts. "But that wasn't the only reason, Noah. There was Toby. He missed Hugh so much, and deep down, I chose him because I figured that would finally give Toby the two parents he deserved. One of the many mistakes I made that day was not telling you how damn hard it was to come to that decision, or why. Honestly, I didn't realize it myself. I know I hurt you badly, Noah-I'll never forgive myself for that. And I knew I had made the worst mistake of my life when we got back to Oakdale."
Luke swallowed hard. "I realized I wasn't in love with him anymore. I will always care about him, but he's not you, Noah. He doesn't get me like you do-in fact, you are the only person that ever has. I loved being with you, seeing the world through your eyes, hearing your opinions, sharing everything. You're so smart and adorable and sweet. With Hugh, all we ended up doing is talking about Toby. I think we actually bore each other."
Noah finally spoke."And how did poor Hugh take this big revelation?" he asked coldly.
"He's the one that pointed it out, as I was in too much denial to admit it. He practically pushed me out the door. He's a good guy, Noah. But he's not the love of my life-you are. And I am so fucking sorry that it's taken me this long to tell you that."
There was a long moment of silence. Then Noah said," I'm sorry too." He turned away. "Go home, Luke."
Luke was shocked and hurt, then angry. He followed Noah, who was heading toward the cottage. "That's it? That's all you're going to say? 'Go home'? What are you feeling right now?"
Noah whirled around, eyes now blazing with anger."That you have a lot of fucking nerve! Showing up out of the blue and asking, 'What am I feeling right now?' How about I'm scared that my heart's about to be ripped out of my chest again by you! And I can't take it, Luke! It's taken me a couple months to get to the point where I want to feel like getting out of the bed every morning. For awhile, all I could think about was you, and I couldn't sleep or eat. Finally my aunt made me call Roland to ask if I could stay with him awhile, and thank god I did. I'm trying to make a new life for myself, one that's was far away from you and fucking Oakdale as I could possibly get! Do you have any idea how hard it was not to drive down there and try to to see you again, beg you to take me back? But I have some pride, Luke-contrary to what you might think. I'm not going to be your goddamn boyfriend by default because you were too fucking gutless to tell me how you really felt! So fuck off, and like I said, go home!"
Luke was silent under this verbal tirade, feeling a bit like he'd gotten his eyebrows singed off. He watched Noah storm into the cottage, slamming the door so hard that he was surprised it didn't fall off it's hinges. He closed his eyes for a moment, and then, with great determination, followed Noah into the cottage.
Noah was standing there, hugging the wet towel close to himself, face flushed, body shaking. He opened his mouth to yell, but Luke cut him off.
"I'll go, but one last thing-say that you don't love me anymore."
"FUCK YOU!" Noah's roar made the walls rattle.
"The last time I saw you Noah, you said that you loved me more than your own life. That doesn't just go away, no matter how angry you are at me. So say that you don't love me anymore, and it's finally over."
"Fuck you." Noah whispered, eyes filling with tears.
Luke grabbed him and shoved him against the wall. "Look me in the eyes, baby, and say you don't love me anymore."
"I can't." Noah was now crying, and so was Luke.
"Why not?" Luke's face was now inches away from Noah's.
"Because I fucking LOVE you, that's why." Noah sobbed. "I never stopped."
Then Noah kissed him. It was wet and desperate and tasted of chlorine and salt and their teeth painfully clashed. "I love you, I love you, I love you!" Luke managed to gasp out before kissing him again and again. Noah hugged him so tightly that Luke thought his ribs might crack, and he couldn't really breathe. He didn't care. If he died right now, he would be completely happy.
They kissed and moaned and then Noah half walked, half dragged him into another room, one with a narrow bed. They both collapsed on top of it, making the headboard smack hard against the wall. Luke felt dazed and crazy, it seemed impossible that this was happening so soon after they were both screaming at each other, but he wasn't about to put on the brakes. Each kiss became harder and fiercer than the last, and they tore at each other's clothing. Noah's body was still wet and cool from the pool, but after Luke yanked down his trunks he found his erect cock hotter than a fiery brand. He roughly stroked it, making Noah writhe and moan in his arms. Noah in turn ripped off Luke's sweaty shirt, scattering buttons everywhere, biting his neck, his shoulder, a nipple.
Noah unbuckled Luke's belt and sent in flying halfway across the room, while Luke unzipped his too tight jeans. Noah shoved denim and jockey shorts over Luke's ass, and whispered hoarsely in his ear, "Condoms are in the night stand." Luke looked around, knocking a book on the floor as he opened a drawer. He fumbled around, finding a Trojan, which Noah snatched from his hand. He tore it open with his teeth and then rolled it on Luke's leaking erection. "I want you fucking NOW!" Noah gasped in his ear.
Luke hesitated, as the last thing he wanted to do was hurt Noah. Noah gave a grunt of frustration and threw his long legs over Luke's shoulders. "Now!" he begged, face smeared with tears and sweat. "Please, Luke-please!"
Luke couldn't stop himself at this point. He found Noah's tight little hole and slid halfway in. Noah arched his back, making a noise that sounded like both pain and ecstasy. He grabbed Luke's ass, pulling him balls deep.
"Oh, GOD Noah!" Luke's sweat dripped on Noah's tanned belly. He was so tight, his lover, and face held every emotion imaginable-love, happiness, sadness, mixed with lust and a tiny bit of fear. Noah was giving him everything at this moment, he'd cracked open wide. Luke was so hard now he knew he wasn't going to last very long. He grabbed Noah's rigid wet cock and fisted it in time to his short, brutal thrusts. Noah howled and his cock pulsed and jumped in Luke's hands, come shooting everywhere, the sheets, Noah's stomach, Luke's chest. Luke followed his lover a second later, letting his climax blow through him like a hurricane.
He melted on top of Noah, who wrapped him up tight. For awhile, all Luke could do was breath and listen to the thump,thump thump of Noah's heart. Noah, in turn, kissed the top of Luke's head, running shaking fingers through his hair.
They were silent for a long while. Luke finally started to cramp a little and pulled out. He yanked off the condom, tying it off, then panicked a little when he saw blood spotting the sheets. "Shit! Noah-god, I hurt you." He wanted to bawl like a baby.
Noah covered his mouth with his hand. "Sssh. I wanted it to hurt. I was cold and angry and numb for so long. I needed this. I needed you." Fresh tears sprang into his eyes and he wiped them away with his fingers. Then he sighed, and gave Luke one of his old, crooked smiles, that pierced Luke's heart, as it was so sad. "This doesn't really change anything, you know."
Luke frowned. "What do you mean? It changes everything. I love you, and you love me, Noah. The rest is all details."
"Is Toby a detail?" Noah asked quietly. "My life is out here now, Luke, in LA. That's the one good thing that's come out of this whole fiasco. I finally said 'fuck it' to commercials, and sold my part of Terrible Trio to Danny and Ameera. I came out here to see if I could be a real director. So far, so good. I'm working on a script with Roland,and we have a couple of studios really interested. I'm also lined up to direct a little indie movie in the end of November up in Vancouver."
Luke's heart sank for a moment, even though he was happy for Noah's success. But then he decided to look the whole thing right in the eye. He brushed some sweaty hair from Noah's forehead. "I am so damn proud of you, baby." He gave him a soft kiss and jumped in. "And I also think Toby will love living in LA."
Noah narrowed his eyes and sat up."Luke-you can't do that. One of the reasons this all happened is that you wanted Hugh back in Toby's life."
"I honestly think that Mr. McClellan will be much, much happier in LA than in teeny, boring old Oakdale. He's a big city guy." Luke said confidently. "We can work it out. Hugh's stepping up to the plate big time."
Noah's face was still covered in disbelief. "What about the rest of your family?"
"My grandmother owns a damn private jet. They can come out and and we can all go to Disneyland."
Noah stared at him. "You-you really want to do this?"
"Yes." Luke said softly. "More than anything. I want this little dramady of ours to have the happiest ending, Noah. I want it corny as hell. I want to buy some big bungalow in Glendale, and I'll write and you'll direct. We'll work on scripts together and have barbecues in the back yard. I want you to watch movies with Tobe and take him to the park. I want lazy afternoons where we lie around the house all day reading the Sunday paper. I want a big sleepy dog that will play ball with Toby. And I want to bore friends and family with the all the pictures from our cruise, telling over and over the crazy way we first met, so very 'meet cute'. Think we can do that?"
Noah looked away for a moment, then he gazed Luke full in the face, giving him his biggest, dorkiest, most wonderful smile.
"Yeah. I think we can." Noah leaned forward and kissed him. There was a light in his eyes now that had been missing. "Now we can cue the music and roll the credits."
Luke happily laughed and pushed him back on the bed. "And makes plans for the sequel."