(no subject)
I did something impulsive. I followed my heart.
Isn't that what you're supposed to do in matters of the heart? You follow it? I feel like my heart's happy now and I feel good about it but my mind is making me worried. And part of it is wondering if people will accept it and then I think who gives a damn what others think? I'll be happy.
I hope.
It's nothing definite. It may not even work.
With the exception of my friends and family my heart's been pretty empty. It's been reaching out, feeling people out, and this year I even tried to be more outgoing and initiate something, and every time it fell through. I see SO many people I care about happy and in relationships and giddy and it makes me feel lonely and not very well liked or wanted.
I think what I wanted was someone who really cared about me and would show me that and was someone I cared about just as much. And I do care about them. I hate seeing things go wrong in their life because they're so wonderful it isn't fair for things to be that way. And I want to fix it or do something and I feel like I can't but.....now.....I think I can. I care about them, I know I do, and I wanted to do something about it and I did. I don't know how it will turn out and it may end badly but for all I know it may make me happier than I've been in months.
Time will tell.
Isn't that what you're supposed to do in matters of the heart? You follow it? I feel like my heart's happy now and I feel good about it but my mind is making me worried. And part of it is wondering if people will accept it and then I think who gives a damn what others think? I'll be happy.
I hope.
It's nothing definite. It may not even work.
With the exception of my friends and family my heart's been pretty empty. It's been reaching out, feeling people out, and this year I even tried to be more outgoing and initiate something, and every time it fell through. I see SO many people I care about happy and in relationships and giddy and it makes me feel lonely and not very well liked or wanted.
I think what I wanted was someone who really cared about me and would show me that and was someone I cared about just as much. And I do care about them. I hate seeing things go wrong in their life because they're so wonderful it isn't fair for things to be that way. And I want to fix it or do something and I feel like I can't but.....now.....I think I can. I care about them, I know I do, and I wanted to do something about it and I did. I don't know how it will turn out and it may end badly but for all I know it may make me happier than I've been in months.
Time will tell.