Not a good day
Life sucks sometimes. Me staying up to do that homework was a big mistake I think, exhaustion and changing sleeping patterns don't go well together. I guess they don't go well separately either though. With the fibro sometimes it will take a few days for me to have a flare up after I push myself too hard and I had that today. I was so embarrassed and ashamed of myself, I tried to sleep for an hour or two before school but I couldn't because there was too much on my mind. I got up, had a shower, got dressed into some nice, clean, wintry clothes and I was ready to walk out the door but I couldn't find my wallet. It took me about forty minutes until I found it and by then I would have needed to take a taxi anyway. I sat down for a minute and I realised that I wouldn't be going to school. It really pissed me the hell off, I looked so nice, washed my hair, smelled nice and it was all a big waste. I felt so stupid.
I haven't been to a maths class in so long and now I have to wait another week before I can hand in my fucking computer assignment. I don't think I've been to many classes recently, I've been so sick ever since the end of the holidays. I'm so worried that they're going to kick me out.
I'm going to look for a new doctor and keep applying for disability until they give it to me, then I just feel like sleeping for a million years. Fuck knows how many times I'll have to try now that Howard has made it a lot more difficult. I have no idea how everyone else sees the issue of the Liberal Party making disabled people go back to work. From the TV news and such they make it look like it gives these bored people something to do and gives them a purpose in life. You couldn't be more out of touch and condescending if you tried. It's so not black and white like that, I'd rather watch TV at home all day than work in some factory doing boring and annoying shit that no healthy person would touch with a 20 foot pole. And there are people like me who have fibromyalgia and other people with all sorts of injuries and immune disorders and such that can't fucking do it, people who simply CAN NOT walk for even 100 metres without feeling like they're going to collapse. I don't know the complete policy on those disabilities but I hope that the people in charge have some common sense instead of the usual "She'll be right, you have to do your bit for the economy" bullshit. Australia is full of cunts.
I haven't been to a maths class in so long and now I have to wait another week before I can hand in my fucking computer assignment. I don't think I've been to many classes recently, I've been so sick ever since the end of the holidays. I'm so worried that they're going to kick me out.
I'm going to look for a new doctor and keep applying for disability until they give it to me, then I just feel like sleeping for a million years. Fuck knows how many times I'll have to try now that Howard has made it a lot more difficult. I have no idea how everyone else sees the issue of the Liberal Party making disabled people go back to work. From the TV news and such they make it look like it gives these bored people something to do and gives them a purpose in life. You couldn't be more out of touch and condescending if you tried. It's so not black and white like that, I'd rather watch TV at home all day than work in some factory doing boring and annoying shit that no healthy person would touch with a 20 foot pole. And there are people like me who have fibromyalgia and other people with all sorts of injuries and immune disorders and such that can't fucking do it, people who simply CAN NOT walk for even 100 metres without feeling like they're going to collapse. I don't know the complete policy on those disabilities but I hope that the people in charge have some common sense instead of the usual "She'll be right, you have to do your bit for the economy" bullshit. Australia is full of cunts.