SCIENCE! (fewd)
Take one packet of chicken mince that was on special.
Add two onions, finely chopped, cook.
Add mixed veg, 1/3 packet.
Eye fruit bowl, add three apples.
Add can of chopped tomatos, simmer.
Decide that this is thus a sweet chilli con carne, add large puddle of mango chilli sauce.
Decide this is a sweet chill con carne, add puddle green chili sauce.
Decide this is a sweet chili con carne, add puddle sweet chili sauce.
Add oregano, vanilla.
Get bored, add more mango chili.
Attempt first taste test.
Decide the (previously never tasted) mango chili sauce is more potent than anticipated!
Add pot of vanilla yogurt in effort to tone down.
Realise pot of vanilla yogurt was actual pot of apricot vanilla yogurt.
Decide that this, being a sweet chili with chicken and fruity overtones, is less disasterous than the strawberry yogurt you also had in fridge.
Pretend apricots had been planned all along, add 1/4 bottle apricot sauce.
Decide not enough tomatos now, add puddle tomato sauce.
Decide if this is gonna be fruity, make it fruity, add more mango chili sauce.
Belatedly remember to cook rice.
Simmer chili con carne while waiting.
While bored, taste test again. Decide that next time, don't use a dessertspoon, and especially remember to wait, what with dessert spoon having been lifted from pan of food that is literally boiling, before eating next time.
Drain rice, put on plate. Add chili con carne.
Ponder vaugely that you usually have cheese on chili con carne, but this is chicken and you don't have cheese on chicken, do you? Go without.
Attempt eat, and/or third taste test.
Return to fridge, procure "second" (Origional) pot of vanilla yogurt. Add half to plate, add half to food still in frypan for later. Make mental note that mango chutney sauce apparently contains habaneros despite being primarily yellow-green.
Attempt eat.
Decide that for a meal with no recipie, no measurements aside from the size of the puddles formed by the sauces, no less than two chili sauces you'd never tried in your life, and a total of one taste test during the entire chili adding process, that this shit ain't half bad...
...Resolve to try and find a recipie for next time anyway, as while evolutionary cooking may have it's benifits, someone somewhere has probably been making fruity sweet chicken chili con carne for a lot longer than you... especially given your current count is "One".
Decide to LJ this in the name of stating current recipie, and poking the cooking-inclined for suggestions and ideas.
UPDATE: Toxicity levels appear to be low, as I have eaten it and written this post and appear to not have sustained any neurological or motor function damage to date. Will keep you posted if toxicity eventuates; or more accurately, probably won't. But you know what I mean.
Add two onions, finely chopped, cook.
Add mixed veg, 1/3 packet.
Eye fruit bowl, add three apples.
Add can of chopped tomatos, simmer.
Decide that this is thus a sweet chilli con carne, add large puddle of mango chilli sauce.
Decide this is a sweet chill con carne, add puddle green chili sauce.
Decide this is a sweet chili con carne, add puddle sweet chili sauce.
Add oregano, vanilla.
Get bored, add more mango chili.
Attempt first taste test.
Decide the (previously never tasted) mango chili sauce is more potent than anticipated!
Add pot of vanilla yogurt in effort to tone down.
Realise pot of vanilla yogurt was actual pot of apricot vanilla yogurt.
Decide that this, being a sweet chili with chicken and fruity overtones, is less disasterous than the strawberry yogurt you also had in fridge.
Pretend apricots had been planned all along, add 1/4 bottle apricot sauce.
Decide not enough tomatos now, add puddle tomato sauce.
Decide if this is gonna be fruity, make it fruity, add more mango chili sauce.
Belatedly remember to cook rice.
Simmer chili con carne while waiting.
While bored, taste test again. Decide that next time, don't use a dessertspoon, and especially remember to wait, what with dessert spoon having been lifted from pan of food that is literally boiling, before eating next time.
Drain rice, put on plate. Add chili con carne.
Ponder vaugely that you usually have cheese on chili con carne, but this is chicken and you don't have cheese on chicken, do you? Go without.
Attempt eat, and/or third taste test.
Return to fridge, procure "second" (Origional) pot of vanilla yogurt. Add half to plate, add half to food still in frypan for later. Make mental note that mango chutney sauce apparently contains habaneros despite being primarily yellow-green.
Attempt eat.
Decide that for a meal with no recipie, no measurements aside from the size of the puddles formed by the sauces, no less than two chili sauces you'd never tried in your life, and a total of one taste test during the entire chili adding process, that this shit ain't half bad...
...Resolve to try and find a recipie for next time anyway, as while evolutionary cooking may have it's benifits, someone somewhere has probably been making fruity sweet chicken chili con carne for a lot longer than you... especially given your current count is "One".
Decide to LJ this in the name of stating current recipie, and poking the cooking-inclined for suggestions and ideas.
UPDATE: Toxicity levels appear to be low, as I have eaten it and written this post and appear to not have sustained any neurological or motor function damage to date. Will keep you posted if toxicity eventuates; or more accurately, probably won't. But you know what I mean.