Drama alert: Critical. Please ignore me until Wedensday.
I am sitting a paper called Object Oriented Programming, using Java to code stuff and teach us the general principles thereof. I got into the course mostly by asking nicely and having a few pre-requisites waived, mostly because this is the last semester the course is going to be run, before the revamp the computer science curriculum and rearrange everything next year.
If I pass this paper with a decent grade (At least a B, apparently), I am allowed to - via asking nicely and some handwaving - use it as a basis for dodging approximately a year and a half of computer science papers, on the basis that whilst I may not be as adept in C/C++ as they usually require for 3rd year courses, they'll let me off because it's obvious I know how to code in something.
Thus, this paper is something of the lynchpin for my continuing education, and I only have one shot.
This morning, I sat a test worth 10% of my final grade, that turned out to have five questions of equal value - one fill-in-the-blanks, one spot-the-errors-in-this-code, and three "handwrite code that does X" questions.
Of course, at this moment my brain decides to completely forget how to handwrite code. Totally. I scribbled down some notes on basic code structure, but couldn't manage any syntax to save myself. So! I just lost 6-7% of my years grade in one hour. But don't worry, it gets better: I have five days until I have to hand in a computing assignment worth 30% of my course grade for this paper. We've had this assignment for two months. I currently have a large number of functions that have, in hindsight, been worthless to write, am thus starting from scratch.
Furthermore, in approximately 4-5 weeks my part time IT job will be ending almost simultaneously with my running out of student allowance, meaning I will be dropping to 0 income. Due to the stresses at the moment, I haven't had time to start looking for another job. I figure I will deal with this 'after wedensday' (When the code is due), but it is another point of concern that has me somewhat stressed.
Further, furthermore, I have for a number of reasons ended up with back trouble, and this has been adversely affecting my sleeping patterns, and while I have medication that will probably help fix that, it also has side-effects that leave me spaced out enough for an entire day (in a bad way, no you can't have any) that I can't afford to take any... until after wedensday.
So. I am stressed, I am overtired, and I am even more stressed, and those three things combined with aghtoomuchwork and the fact I am in low grade dull /pain/ mean that my mind is throwing itself for a loop and trying spiritedly to distract me with the various OCD/Spatial quirks I have. I am currently winning enough to continue to function.
I am not winning enough to hold my tongue, and the stress has made me downright pessimistic, inflammatory, and prone to picking fights and quibbles at every bloody opportunity. I'm trying, I'm just... tending not to succeed.
For this I apologise, and make the request: If I'm trying to start something, being an asshole, or nitpicky or bastardly or shitstirring or any other of the above things, please forgive me. It's sort of an OCD thing (Not really, but it's a long story and it is related indirectly so that will do for now), and right now I simply don't have time to control it. Combined with the sharp tongue will be a temper measured in oscillations of a Caesium-133 atom.
In the interests of Drama prevention (Or at least suppression), I'd like to politely ask that you just humor/ignore/holdagrudgebutdon'tdoanythinguntilAFTERwedensday me until, um, after Wedensday. I'm just going to be a shitstirring dramabomb with a sour mood and a short temper, and crossing me is liable to result in my patience lasting precicely long enough to summon nuclear weapons on any and all offending, possibly offending, percieved to be offending, or vaugely-within-blast-radius parties.
If this sounds like a copout or an excuse to you, go jump off something and stay jumped till after wedensday anyway, OK? Please?
Thanks. And... yah. Sorry about this. *sigh*
(This post may be publically shared with anyone else I piss off too. Hell, please do.My drama control circuits are basically fried, so if folks can do that for me it might save heartache all round.)
If I pass this paper with a decent grade (At least a B, apparently), I am allowed to - via asking nicely and some handwaving - use it as a basis for dodging approximately a year and a half of computer science papers, on the basis that whilst I may not be as adept in C/C++ as they usually require for 3rd year courses, they'll let me off because it's obvious I know how to code in something.
Thus, this paper is something of the lynchpin for my continuing education, and I only have one shot.
This morning, I sat a test worth 10% of my final grade, that turned out to have five questions of equal value - one fill-in-the-blanks, one spot-the-errors-in-this-code, and three "handwrite code that does X" questions.
Of course, at this moment my brain decides to completely forget how to handwrite code. Totally. I scribbled down some notes on basic code structure, but couldn't manage any syntax to save myself. So! I just lost 6-7% of my years grade in one hour. But don't worry, it gets better: I have five days until I have to hand in a computing assignment worth 30% of my course grade for this paper. We've had this assignment for two months. I currently have a large number of functions that have, in hindsight, been worthless to write, am thus starting from scratch.
Furthermore, in approximately 4-5 weeks my part time IT job will be ending almost simultaneously with my running out of student allowance, meaning I will be dropping to 0 income. Due to the stresses at the moment, I haven't had time to start looking for another job. I figure I will deal with this 'after wedensday' (When the code is due), but it is another point of concern that has me somewhat stressed.
Further, furthermore, I have for a number of reasons ended up with back trouble, and this has been adversely affecting my sleeping patterns, and while I have medication that will probably help fix that, it also has side-effects that leave me spaced out enough for an entire day (in a bad way, no you can't have any) that I can't afford to take any... until after wedensday.
So. I am stressed, I am overtired, and I am even more stressed, and those three things combined with aghtoomuchwork and the fact I am in low grade dull /pain/ mean that my mind is throwing itself for a loop and trying spiritedly to distract me with the various OCD/Spatial quirks I have. I am currently winning enough to continue to function.
I am not winning enough to hold my tongue, and the stress has made me downright pessimistic, inflammatory, and prone to picking fights and quibbles at every bloody opportunity. I'm trying, I'm just... tending not to succeed.
For this I apologise, and make the request: If I'm trying to start something, being an asshole, or nitpicky or bastardly or shitstirring or any other of the above things, please forgive me. It's sort of an OCD thing (Not really, but it's a long story and it is related indirectly so that will do for now), and right now I simply don't have time to control it. Combined with the sharp tongue will be a temper measured in oscillations of a Caesium-133 atom.
In the interests of Drama prevention (Or at least suppression), I'd like to politely ask that you just humor/ignore/holdagrudgebutdon'tdoanythinguntilAFTERwedensday me until, um, after Wedensday. I'm just going to be a shitstirring dramabomb with a sour mood and a short temper, and crossing me is liable to result in my patience lasting precicely long enough to summon nuclear weapons on any and all offending, possibly offending, percieved to be offending, or vaugely-within-blast-radius parties.
If this sounds like a copout or an excuse to you, go jump off something and stay jumped till after wedensday anyway, OK? Please?
Thanks. And... yah. Sorry about this. *sigh*
(This post may be publically shared with anyone else I piss off too. Hell, please do.My drama control circuits are basically fried, so if folks can do that for me it might save heartache all round.)