...
i dont even want the goddamn bear anymore. My stomach is sick. my heart is poisoned with hate, distrust. I feel like i'm stuck in a fucking MTV sitcom and i'm the emotional one who cries alot. Boo fucking hooo. I am a piece of shit. No really, i'm not kidding, i am a steaming pile of crap. My cousin said it best. "Are you the person your capable of being Brian?" ......No. "Well then, your fucking broken."
Hit the nail on the head! :)
I guess from what everyone's told me i'm capable of great and wonderful things and i can be this amazing person whos nice and considerate and kind. But i know people like that, and i'm nothing like them. They wont even talk to me. They're the kids in highschool who wouldn't study with me and told me to go fuck off and die. I just blew off class and got high instead. Again <------------ not copping out. I accept responsibility for being the fuck-up i am. But I want to change so fucking bad. I want to be wholesome. I want to make people proud and be respectable. I want to be able to fucking look in the mirror and not Cringe. I need a role model, shit i need a whole new fucking social circle. THAT IS, if I can manage to stay out of jail.
I need a hug.
Hit the nail on the head! :)
I guess from what everyone's told me i'm capable of great and wonderful things and i can be this amazing person whos nice and considerate and kind. But i know people like that, and i'm nothing like them. They wont even talk to me. They're the kids in highschool who wouldn't study with me and told me to go fuck off and die. I just blew off class and got high instead. Again <------------ not copping out. I accept responsibility for being the fuck-up i am. But I want to change so fucking bad. I want to be wholesome. I want to make people proud and be respectable. I want to be able to fucking look in the mirror and not Cringe. I need a role model, shit i need a whole new fucking social circle. THAT IS, if I can manage to stay out of jail.
I need a hug.