I wrote this sober the night before
5 June 2006
Lindsay,
From the moment you stepped into my life with those pretty blue eyes, gorgeous smile and beautiful hari whatever the color you made an impact on my life. When I was introduced to you all i could think of was how amazing you were. After a while of not talking to you I became like a kitten curiosity just killing me inside and out. I wanted to know every little detail to your life everything. The first time we hung out I was so nervous because I didn't know what ot expet all I could thnk of was don't be stupid don't be stupid. That first night I cleaned the basement , and went upstairs and primped my hair so it was perfect shaved, brushed my teeth and threw on some cologne. I just wanted to impress you, I don't know why I just did. It was like for some reason or another my first impression was going to mean the world to you. After we hung out and I gave you a hug I slept so well on my back in fact, you may have or haven't noticed that I generally sleep on my stomach because when Jerry was an alcoholic he would come in our room (Lee and I's) and grab us and shake us saying "boys is she cheating on me with some mexican" or something along the lines of that. So I would roll over on my side snuggled up in my train blanket and hold my bear close to me and pray someday things would get better. Anyways I fell asleep on my back and thought about how cute you looked, and couldn't get you off my mind until I woke up the next day. Remember that one day we drove around forever... I felt so good being there with you the whole time, I knew that night I had to do something I didn't know what I just knew that something had to be done. I believe it was the next time that we hung out with Shaun and I did the stupidest thing in my life. I ignored you all night, all the while I layed on the couch I cried because I didn't know what to do I was stuck. I shoudl've went outside with you and told you sorry but instead I pushed you away as I shut the door and locked the deadbolt and you out of my life. I felt like the luckiest guy when I heard from you the next time, I thought of all the happy times in my life and combined them it was such a relief to know you hadn't given up on me. The awkard silence at Wiards was all of my fault I wanted to talk to you alone and tell you how sorry I was and hope that you could forgive me. That meeting as I look back on it and it taught me alot of things like take a chance, don't be scared. That night I hung out with you and Jesses and Melanie, I was so worried I had no idea what to think, yet when the movie was playing all I could think about was the warmth from your soft skin as you held my hand to your face. You fell asleep holding me and it made me so happy I teared up..... that's all i wrote
I thought about putting more into it, like tonight we broke up I don't know what else to say I'm at a loss of words. I'll never regret meeting you hanging out with you, I just don't know what to do. Who will I talk to about this, what will I say i'm scared..
I hope you have the best week and again make the right decision.
I love you Lindsay Marie Turner with all of my heart
Yours Truly,
Joshua James Muse
Lindsay,
From the moment you stepped into my life with those pretty blue eyes, gorgeous smile and beautiful hari whatever the color you made an impact on my life. When I was introduced to you all i could think of was how amazing you were. After a while of not talking to you I became like a kitten curiosity just killing me inside and out. I wanted to know every little detail to your life everything. The first time we hung out I was so nervous because I didn't know what ot expet all I could thnk of was don't be stupid don't be stupid. That first night I cleaned the basement , and went upstairs and primped my hair so it was perfect shaved, brushed my teeth and threw on some cologne. I just wanted to impress you, I don't know why I just did. It was like for some reason or another my first impression was going to mean the world to you. After we hung out and I gave you a hug I slept so well on my back in fact, you may have or haven't noticed that I generally sleep on my stomach because when Jerry was an alcoholic he would come in our room (Lee and I's) and grab us and shake us saying "boys is she cheating on me with some mexican" or something along the lines of that. So I would roll over on my side snuggled up in my train blanket and hold my bear close to me and pray someday things would get better. Anyways I fell asleep on my back and thought about how cute you looked, and couldn't get you off my mind until I woke up the next day. Remember that one day we drove around forever... I felt so good being there with you the whole time, I knew that night I had to do something I didn't know what I just knew that something had to be done. I believe it was the next time that we hung out with Shaun and I did the stupidest thing in my life. I ignored you all night, all the while I layed on the couch I cried because I didn't know what to do I was stuck. I shoudl've went outside with you and told you sorry but instead I pushed you away as I shut the door and locked the deadbolt and you out of my life. I felt like the luckiest guy when I heard from you the next time, I thought of all the happy times in my life and combined them it was such a relief to know you hadn't given up on me. The awkard silence at Wiards was all of my fault I wanted to talk to you alone and tell you how sorry I was and hope that you could forgive me. That meeting as I look back on it and it taught me alot of things like take a chance, don't be scared. That night I hung out with you and Jesses and Melanie, I was so worried I had no idea what to think, yet when the movie was playing all I could think about was the warmth from your soft skin as you held my hand to your face. You fell asleep holding me and it made me so happy I teared up..... that's all i wrote
I thought about putting more into it, like tonight we broke up I don't know what else to say I'm at a loss of words. I'll never regret meeting you hanging out with you, I just don't know what to do. Who will I talk to about this, what will I say i'm scared..
I hope you have the best week and again make the right decision.
I love you Lindsay Marie Turner with all of my heart
Yours Truly,
Joshua James Muse