I need you like a bad habit
I'm falling for the guy I talked about earlier, and it's bad. I have a huge crush on him, and it's kinda annoying but it also makes me so much happier. I can't stop thinking about him, and all I talk about nowadays is somehow related to him.
We talked on MSN on Sunday like, for the whole day and then we went for a walk together. We were just walking around and then he said that we could go to a hill where you can see the most of the city. I was like "dude, that's one of those places where you take your date to!" but decided to just shut up. And then we talked about random stuff and it wasn't awkward at all. I told him that I felt really happy, and he said that I looked like it and that I was beaming. Little did he know he was the reason.
On Monday I thanked him for the good time we had and he said he enjoyed it too, and that I cheered him up. It goes without saying it made my day.
Today I haven't talked to him, and it makes me anxious... I'm so freaking addicted to him, and it's no good.
It's so confusing... He's giving some almost clear signs but I'm afraid to just go for it, 'cos I'm scared that I've gotten it all wrong. Right now it's surreal to me to think he'd say "no" if I told him, but then I start thinking and I'm not so sure anymore. Last night I felt like I have to ask him what do I mean for him, soon. I went through everything he could say to me and how would I react to them. I came to the conclusion that I'd cry, whatever the answer is.
I feel so lame... I don't know what is this, but it's not some innocent crush anymore. I can't sleep or concentrate on anything, and I just want to call for him and ask if he could hang out with me. But then I'm scared I come out as an idiotic teenage girl with a teenage crush. And I really can't see a reason why he would be interested.
My friend also has a crush, but unlike me it's really shitty for her, and she's pretty down. And I feel like the worst friend ever, 'cos I'm happier than I've been for a long time and she's the complete opposite. I can't do anything to make her feel better and it's so frustrating. She's never been that depressed, and I hate to see her like that.
Wow... This is probably the longest post I've ever made. Congratulations if you made it this far, it's pretty... I don't know, uninteresting. I just needed to get this out of my system.
Love.
We talked on MSN on Sunday like, for the whole day and then we went for a walk together. We were just walking around and then he said that we could go to a hill where you can see the most of the city. I was like "dude, that's one of those places where you take your date to!" but decided to just shut up. And then we talked about random stuff and it wasn't awkward at all. I told him that I felt really happy, and he said that I looked like it and that I was beaming. Little did he know he was the reason.
On Monday I thanked him for the good time we had and he said he enjoyed it too, and that I cheered him up. It goes without saying it made my day.
Today I haven't talked to him, and it makes me anxious... I'm so freaking addicted to him, and it's no good.
It's so confusing... He's giving some almost clear signs but I'm afraid to just go for it, 'cos I'm scared that I've gotten it all wrong. Right now it's surreal to me to think he'd say "no" if I told him, but then I start thinking and I'm not so sure anymore. Last night I felt like I have to ask him what do I mean for him, soon. I went through everything he could say to me and how would I react to them. I came to the conclusion that I'd cry, whatever the answer is.
I feel so lame... I don't know what is this, but it's not some innocent crush anymore. I can't sleep or concentrate on anything, and I just want to call for him and ask if he could hang out with me. But then I'm scared I come out as an idiotic teenage girl with a teenage crush. And I really can't see a reason why he would be interested.
My friend also has a crush, but unlike me it's really shitty for her, and she's pretty down. And I feel like the worst friend ever, 'cos I'm happier than I've been for a long time and she's the complete opposite. I can't do anything to make her feel better and it's so frustrating. She's never been that depressed, and I hate to see her like that.
Wow... This is probably the longest post I've ever made. Congratulations if you made it this far, it's pretty... I don't know, uninteresting. I just needed to get this out of my system.
Love.