WIP Amnesty: you and me and the fire makes three

[re_white]

Title: you and me and the fire makes three
Pairing: Kirk/McCoy
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and court no profits with this fanwork.
Notes: Author!fail in brackets.

Summery:

Comments

[kayliemalinza]

There are secrets in Jim's house, in the flutter of the pale yellow curtains over the kitchen sink, in the scratches and scuff marks worn into the floors, and in the off-color plaster patchwork dotting the walls of the upstairs hallway... wooden moans and tattling creaks every time he goes to take a piss or get a beer.

I love descriptions of houses--any setting, really, especially those that are as much a character as the people moving about in them--and this paragraph (hell, on re-reading, this whole fic) was especially satisfying.

Just looking at it past Sulu's tin-foil-crowned head (Gaila) makes Jim feel warm inside, happy to be on his ship and surrounded by gifted lunatics with poor grammar and an inappropriate sense of humor.
I feel this is some sort of ungodly AU, like steampunk but leaning heavily on 1980s college movies rather than the Victorian Era, and it's fascinating and pearl-like, encapsulated. So uh. Keep writing it, pretty please.

Jim's childhood bedroom is essentially a library with a mattress in the middle of it.
*steals*

Bones grabs him by his belt loops and hauls him up onto the sink, and Jim can't remember the last time someone did that
That's a damn shame. It should be a weekly occurence, really.

They fuck in every room of the house.
*
Fucking in the closet is an accident.
lolllll

“Bones. Bones, shit. My mom's dead and my house is on fire.” Jim chews his lip. “Also, I'm go'n to jail.”
Oh....

I knew there was a reason for all this, and I like how you don't say it right off, because then the fic gets a second life once you cast an eye over the preceding events in the light of this revelation. There are two fics, really: the fic-that-was-read and the fic-that-now-makes-sense.

Maybe you stalled on this because by the time you get to that revelation, the fic is done? Rhythm-wise, it feels like the fire should be the climax and the revelation is the final note, and everything afterward, though vital to the continuation of the universe/the continuity of these characters' lives, is utterly external to the fic itself.