(no subject)
Still reading all those old entires (there are A LOT of them) Although I'm kinda really pissed at myself cuz I have appologized and taken the blame for so many things when I didn't do a single fucking thing wrong. Sometimes it was someone else who made me feel like I needed to and that I was a horrible person, other times I felt pressure to make things right so I just took it all onto myself, and then still other times I was just trying to be a good person. (those issues were part of my $2 hore and white trash and later criminal phases mentioned in that thing I wrote to John. Of course note, it's not just John I did this with, there were plenty of times withplenty of people.) I think when my entry finally comes out about that stuff it's gonna be an interesting one cuz it's gone from just about changes I see in John to Changes in everyone and thing.
Well, I skipped a lecture today, and right now I'm skipping my His. class. I just don't feel like going.
Chris got on and wished me a happy V-day this morning, but I wasn't feeling it. Talked to Ashley in PED class, more talk of V-day. I always have been and always will be of a similar opinion to Matt as far as V-day is concerned. Niff was asking last night if I'd be alright today, I can't even remember what I told her cuz it was late and I'd taken a nap yesterday cuz I had a huge headache. All I know is I'm in a really really piss ass mood today for a few different reasons and I don't feel like dealing with anyone or anything right now. I won't skip my next class, and I can't skipp math cuz I have to go fail a test. Ahh I'll go to Granma's later and have her cook me a bunch of shit... Lol, that's all I need- to go from an anxiety-stricken-anorexic to an emotionally-bound-bulemic. Not that I really am either, I'll admit that I typically do have a food aversion that comes out when I'm really upset, but I am in no way shape or form anorexic, and I don't like throwing up so I'd never be able to be a bulemic if I wanted to- which I don't. Nope instead I'll just let my combo of really overactive meabolism just do it's thing and thank god that I got my moms biomechanics and not my dads. I do need to work out some though, and if it weren't for the fact that my shin is totally busted open then I probably would while I'm at Granma's today. Oh well maybe a lil food and some TV vegging. That sounds good, and of course some serious internet time.
Well I'm done for now guys. later.
Well, I skipped a lecture today, and right now I'm skipping my His. class. I just don't feel like going.
Chris got on and wished me a happy V-day this morning, but I wasn't feeling it. Talked to Ashley in PED class, more talk of V-day. I always have been and always will be of a similar opinion to Matt as far as V-day is concerned. Niff was asking last night if I'd be alright today, I can't even remember what I told her cuz it was late and I'd taken a nap yesterday cuz I had a huge headache. All I know is I'm in a really really piss ass mood today for a few different reasons and I don't feel like dealing with anyone or anything right now. I won't skip my next class, and I can't skipp math cuz I have to go fail a test. Ahh I'll go to Granma's later and have her cook me a bunch of shit... Lol, that's all I need- to go from an anxiety-stricken-anorexic to an emotionally-bound-bulemic. Not that I really am either, I'll admit that I typically do have a food aversion that comes out when I'm really upset, but I am in no way shape or form anorexic, and I don't like throwing up so I'd never be able to be a bulemic if I wanted to- which I don't. Nope instead I'll just let my combo of really overactive meabolism just do it's thing and thank god that I got my moms biomechanics and not my dads. I do need to work out some though, and if it weren't for the fact that my shin is totally busted open then I probably would while I'm at Granma's today. Oh well maybe a lil food and some TV vegging. That sounds good, and of course some serious internet time.
Well I'm done for now guys. later.