(no subject)
I'm reception for the week!
and the HR person is gone!!!!! lol
You'll never believe what overhead lighting and coffee will do for my mental stimulation.
The morning is flying by at rapid speed...they have another intern doing all the stuff I used to do (techincally I'm an intern...but I can't get credit for it because it doesn't do anything for my major...) so I've been sitting here looking at deviantart and contemplating all these images I have in my head just bursting.
It's like being on the verge of a mental orgasm. I love that. I love that the thought of creating something can excite me to that point.
I just miss the fact that I can't run to Pat anymore and ramble on about all my ideas and have his eyes glaze over...lol
I think I need to start writing more...maybe in my sketchbook, or get a notebook specifically for that purpose...collect and conquer...
I feel mad as fuck right now...in the best way possible...
I have to get out of bed before 2pm more often *nods*
and paint...and draw...and live.
I know what is going to get me through all the shit I'm in, and it's being myself. Not trying to dull it with drugs and alcohol. But letting myself feel every fucking emotion that streams through me. And really channeling it. I know that is so much easier said than done. But fuck. You know what. I know me. I know me better than I think. And I know what makes me happy. Being in love and creating. If I can't have one...I at least have the other...
I wish I could keep on top of this feeling right now...I hate being so low I can't function. I'm so manic.
I really should think about asking my grandparents about getting some better lamps in my room. I swear, the lighting in here does something to me. I like light. I miss the daylight in Ireland...allllll 18 hours of it.
When 8pm feels like 5pm...you know you are awake.
I feel amazing. lol.
I think I am going to try to get over to Michael's today and pick up somethings so I can get back to painting...considering I only have a month and a half before going back to the Buff...I know I have to get the wheels turning because the show in Cortland is in October...and it is highly doubtful I'll be doing non-school type work back at school...
Sooo much on my mind...overload..need...sketchbook...
and the HR person is gone!!!!! lol
You'll never believe what overhead lighting and coffee will do for my mental stimulation.
The morning is flying by at rapid speed...they have another intern doing all the stuff I used to do (techincally I'm an intern...but I can't get credit for it because it doesn't do anything for my major...) so I've been sitting here looking at deviantart and contemplating all these images I have in my head just bursting.
It's like being on the verge of a mental orgasm. I love that. I love that the thought of creating something can excite me to that point.
I just miss the fact that I can't run to Pat anymore and ramble on about all my ideas and have his eyes glaze over...lol
I think I need to start writing more...maybe in my sketchbook, or get a notebook specifically for that purpose...collect and conquer...
I feel mad as fuck right now...in the best way possible...
I have to get out of bed before 2pm more often *nods*
and paint...and draw...and live.
I know what is going to get me through all the shit I'm in, and it's being myself. Not trying to dull it with drugs and alcohol. But letting myself feel every fucking emotion that streams through me. And really channeling it. I know that is so much easier said than done. But fuck. You know what. I know me. I know me better than I think. And I know what makes me happy. Being in love and creating. If I can't have one...I at least have the other...
I wish I could keep on top of this feeling right now...I hate being so low I can't function. I'm so manic.
I really should think about asking my grandparents about getting some better lamps in my room. I swear, the lighting in here does something to me. I like light. I miss the daylight in Ireland...allllll 18 hours of it.
When 8pm feels like 5pm...you know you are awake.
I feel amazing. lol.
I think I am going to try to get over to Michael's today and pick up somethings so I can get back to painting...considering I only have a month and a half before going back to the Buff...I know I have to get the wheels turning because the show in Cortland is in October...and it is highly doubtful I'll be doing non-school type work back at school...
Sooo much on my mind...overload..need...sketchbook...