(no subject)
tonight has been the first time that ive cried in a rather long time.......and apparently a much needed one, because they just poured out.....
i feel so shitty, i never NEVER should have tried to hide that from you Tyler.....you never hide anything from the one you love, i know that you would have helped me to not hurt myself that night, i know i would have been fine, had i just talked to you.....but i felt so angry at that time.....so enraged at my father.....and so pissed off at myself that i felt i deserved it....
but of course IMMEDIATLY after doing so....looking at it....i knew it was all wrong....that id made a terrible mistake and that i should tell you, but i was so ashamed....
i know that i promised this time, and i know in myself that i can keep that promise.....i just hope that you find it in yourself to trust in my promise.....
im going to have a hard time sleeping tonight, but i hope that things will be better tomorrow....
hopefully after i talk to him about it more things will be helped and understood....
i just feel so horrible right now, because im so ashamed at that moment of weakness......
i know i am so much stronger then that!!!!
GGGRRRRAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
i feel so shitty, i never NEVER should have tried to hide that from you Tyler.....you never hide anything from the one you love, i know that you would have helped me to not hurt myself that night, i know i would have been fine, had i just talked to you.....but i felt so angry at that time.....so enraged at my father.....and so pissed off at myself that i felt i deserved it....
but of course IMMEDIATLY after doing so....looking at it....i knew it was all wrong....that id made a terrible mistake and that i should tell you, but i was so ashamed....
i know that i promised this time, and i know in myself that i can keep that promise.....i just hope that you find it in yourself to trust in my promise.....
im going to have a hard time sleeping tonight, but i hope that things will be better tomorrow....
hopefully after i talk to him about it more things will be helped and understood....
i just feel so horrible right now, because im so ashamed at that moment of weakness......
i know i am so much stronger then that!!!!
GGGRRRRAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!