(no subject)
I live in the past. I can't help it. No matter what I do to try and shake the memories of who I was , who I held dear, they creep up on me and take hold much more often than i think they should.
So, I cleaned out a closet today, and found an old folder filled with random poems and soul spillings from when I was 19 or so. Man I used to be smart.
I was in love, unrequited love, but it was real. I was exploring. I think at that time Bea was teaching me about girl love, and Brad was teaching me about soul sibling love. I took that for granted, that it was the beginning of an adventurous and fulfilling life. I never thought that was all I would ever have.
I'm thinking about divorce...and not to kid myself, it's something I've always thought about. I mean, seriously. This isn't ever going to work. It hasn't ever worked..it's just a fix, a lie, a stagnant and slow death. I think I'm going to be sick. Who the fuck have I become?
So, I cleaned out a closet today, and found an old folder filled with random poems and soul spillings from when I was 19 or so. Man I used to be smart.
I was in love, unrequited love, but it was real. I was exploring. I think at that time Bea was teaching me about girl love, and Brad was teaching me about soul sibling love. I took that for granted, that it was the beginning of an adventurous and fulfilling life. I never thought that was all I would ever have.
I'm thinking about divorce...and not to kid myself, it's something I've always thought about. I mean, seriously. This isn't ever going to work. It hasn't ever worked..it's just a fix, a lie, a stagnant and slow death. I think I'm going to be sick. Who the fuck have I become?