May 09, 2006 20:43
CHUCK NORRIS FACTS
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
Jawbreakers were originally in the shape of Chuck Norris' fist.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Jeeves asks Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris can speak braille.
Chuck Norris refers to himself in fourth person.
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.
At birth, Chuck Norris came out feet first so he could roundhouse kick the doctor in the face. Nobody delivers Chuck Norris but Chuck Norris
Whenever someone is constipated, doctors send them to Chuck Norris so he can scare the shit out of them.
Chuck Norris' cowboy boots are made from real cowboys.
The phrase "Made by Chuck Norris" is imprinted beneath the surface of China.
Geico saved 15% by switching to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
Chuck Norris got in touch with his feminine side, and promptly got her pregnant.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
The only reason the Energizer Bunny keeps going and going is because it knows Chuck Norris is after it.