anyways
ok, where i left off. Ali and i had our first real kiss. i mean, shes kissed my check and neck before but never a REAL kiss. well, later, i was laying on her bed and she was sitting at the end, well she reached over me to her nightstand thing for something then she went to go back, well i decided to persure her, and i gently grabbed her arm, and she like, layed on me and we huged then it lead to another kiss. like, a make out kinda kiss. it was SO PERFECT! omg i wanted o cry. then the last kiss i got was the goodbye kiss when i left. its easy to kiss her i notice sitting down,cus she is taller than me, and ive never been with a girl who is taller than me but o well. HEHE i blush! i know i know, its cute, shut up. i finaly got to talk to Shelly again, its been like forever. SHELLY I STILL LOVE YOU! neways, school sucked again. i got home and just was in my room. then i got online and yeah, Jeff starts to bitch me out. He basically told me that i am using my mental medicated disorderes as an excuse. yeah, WTF? he claims to suffer from some anxiety disorder. well Jeff, you dont know how bad it can get until you live the life i have ok? so fuck you dude, i love you but i can't deal with you treating me like this. o and i know your gonna want to comment but i dont wanna hear from you till you say sorry and MEAN IT for making me feel like total shit. self mutalation is self mutalation Jeff, you cuting yourself especially as bad as you do!, is just as bad as my pill popping. neways, AWE i read Kelseys xanga and i made her list of people she loves! it was me, Andrew (of course), Sara (ur big sis??) and Liz. it made me so happy! Kelsey i Love you soo much! Im so glad youre my friend! im excited cus tomorrow i have therapy. yeah isnt that sad, im excted for therapy, well the way i see it, if i go in with a positive attitude, then it mite just help! and Kels reassures me that it isnt that bad and it does help. so yey. and im excited for he Canada trip. Kelsey you better be going on that! Well, i gotta get goin, bye and i love you.
~Rachel
~Rachel