An in Depth, Critical Examination of the Hit TV Show MacGyver
Auctung! The following essay is made up of seemingly useless, random objects, not traditionally used in the composition of essays.
Have you ever watched MacGyver? It's still on you know. It's become one of the new overkill shows on Spike TV. By that I mean that it is one of the few shows that they can play, so they do so constantly. There was once a time when this station was called the New TNN, and they showed only Mad TV, Real TV, and towards the end of their existence, CSI. Now that they are Spike TV they have brought in some additional original programming. They play a lot more CSI, and a lot less Mad TV, none actually. In addition, the time originally alloted to Real TV has been cut in half to make space for the new show Max X (obviously standing for Maximum Exposure), which is basically Real TV with a much cheekier announcer and more focus on severe injuries, rather than explosions. And then, of course, there's MacGyver. I never could have imagined that this show of legend was all that it was cracked up to be, but it has turned out to be so much more.
For those of you unaware, you poor souls, here is the standard episode summary:
MacGyver is an immortal. He travels the world, righting the wrongs of this planet. Often, he gets himself involved with some downtrodden victim of organized crime or corrupt members of societies elite. He becomes a part of their struggle often by means of a chance encounter, persuasion from outside forces of good such as the Police, the Phoenix Institute, or Momma (played by Della Reese), or a combination of the two. Now, MacGyver is placed in these situations where he has to protect the good guys, thwart the bad guys, cop a feel off of his most likely female sidekick, and save the world. Most of the time one of the people MacGyver is helping gets kidnapped by the bad guys somehow, and he must then get them back. This tends to be when things get a little complicated. Since MacGyver is immortal, he knows and can do anything and everything. MacGyver is not too keen on violence and death, so he uses elaborate boobie traps or weapons made from whatever he finds lying around to get the job done. In the end, he not only stops the villains, but usually stops someone from doing something they would have regretted. Invariably, MacGyver turns down the offer of rewards for his good deeds, and then proceeds to continue wondering the Earth, looking for injustices.
No matter the situation, MacGyver's industrious nature and knack for getting in and out of trouble never cease to amaze me. One of todays episodes starts off innocently as MacGyver is investigating the whereabouts of some stolen baseball cards in a local comic/card trading store. The owner turns out to be crooked, and a fight breaks out between him and a young woman who apparently is tired of the crooked inner workings of the local collectible industry. Outside the store, MacGyver resists an offer from the girl to help crack down on the counterfeit baseball card ring, run by gangsters. Then all of a sudden, big, fat, black, old Della Reese comes blasting around the corner, somehow being pulled by a bulldog about the size of her gargantuan head. She plays the character of a woman whom MacGyver calls Momma, who runs the foster home the baseball cards were stolen from. Later we learn that she has connections that give her access to virtually any information needed by MacGyver in the hunt for justice in a town where organized crime has its fingers in almost every pie, including baseball collectibles. So, despite his best efforts, old MacGyver ends up trying to bring down this corrupt system. We soon learn that the young girl helping MacGyver is not only a babe and an avid baseball memorabilia collector, but also the daughter of a famous baseball player. As it turns out, MacGyver once worked at the stadium where he played. As a result, MacGyver knows things about him that neither he or his daughter does, such as he always scratches his nose with the back of his hand before he steels second. Later we learn that this baseball player is under pressure from the gangsters to steel them an invaluable collection that only he can access. MacGyver goes to the crooked card shop in a brilliant disguise as the geeky son of a wealthy socialite, and pretends to have his heart set on the acquirement of some valuable cards he knows only the gangsters can get him. Using a rather devious scheme, he tricks the greedy store clerk into calling the gangsters. When they deny the order, MacGyver leaves. We then learn that MacGyver was recording all of this. He then figures out the phone number based on the tone the numbers made as the clerk dialed. Once this is figured out, he gets Momma to track down the address belonging to the number. Eventually, the girl ends up being kidnapped while she is trying to warn MacGyver about just who's house he is staking out. You see, she mistakes the sound of the dog that MacGyver tricked into a shed for MacGyver, and lets him out which then draws the attention of the bad guys. With the daughter kidnapped, the baseball player thinks he has no choice but to give in and steel the gangsters the memorabilia. When MacGyver discovers this, he stops him and convinces him to alert the police instead. For a time this works, but then he panics and drives off without MacGyver. Fortunately for MacGyver, he had already traded with the gangsters a signed softball so well faked that not even they could tell. Why did this work well for MacGyver you say? Because he had hidden a tracking device in the base of the baseball case. He then goes to the factory where he sees the girl, her father, and the gangsters. The baseball player had attempted to force the gangsters to give him back his daughter before the trade off of all the stolen goods, but they simply threatened to cut off his daughters hand for such an audacious action. He agrees to get them all of the goods, but as he does so sees MacGyver, who scratches his nose with the back of his hand. As he is being taken away by a gangster, MacGyver springs into action and the two of them beat up the gangster, out of view of the others. MacGyver then creates a distraction by turning on one of the machines, and attacking the gangster who comes to check it out. A scuffle ensues, and the lead gangster ends up driving away in the car with the stolen goods inside. The heroes race outside, and at first all looks hopeless. But then MacGyver sees something. "The sign" he yells to the baseball player. MacGyver then pitches the ball the baseball player was attempting to trade to him, and he hits it with the bat he was trying to trade. The ball hits its mark, a baseball stadium scoreboard that the factory had hanging above its entrance. The sign explodes, and crushes the car, stopping the getaway of the gangster. The stolen cards are returned to the young foster child they were stolen from. The child offers to pay what little money he has to the baseball player for an autograph, but he remarks "there are just some things you shouldn't put a price on," and signs the child's card free of charge.
The raw gangster nature of MacGyver himself is hard to put into words. He pulls of a mullet better than anyone I have ever seen. He also repeatedly makes this face, one that gives him a look of childish ignorance. If you've ever watched the Chris Issac show, it's the face that the character Ensign makes almost constantly, this sort of retardedly flabbergasted look of confusion. It acts as a counterbalance to his sheer brilliance. His on screen magnetism can be best summed up by the clip of him used for one of th transitional commercials between shows on Spike TV, where MacGyver can be seen fighting, what appears to be, a cobra. MacGyver did something special to me. It instilled in me a love for baseball I thought could only be achieved by strippers in baseball uniforms, Rookie of the Year, or something else related to that (NO ONE GETS IT BUT ME FUCK YOU). So when we look back at the 80s and wish we were dead for having lived during that period, let us not think of shit ass fads and stupid people like the pope. Let us instead think of great television shows like Magnum P.I., Quantum Leap, and of course, MacGyver.
Have you ever watched MacGyver? It's still on you know. It's become one of the new overkill shows on Spike TV. By that I mean that it is one of the few shows that they can play, so they do so constantly. There was once a time when this station was called the New TNN, and they showed only Mad TV, Real TV, and towards the end of their existence, CSI. Now that they are Spike TV they have brought in some additional original programming. They play a lot more CSI, and a lot less Mad TV, none actually. In addition, the time originally alloted to Real TV has been cut in half to make space for the new show Max X (obviously standing for Maximum Exposure), which is basically Real TV with a much cheekier announcer and more focus on severe injuries, rather than explosions. And then, of course, there's MacGyver. I never could have imagined that this show of legend was all that it was cracked up to be, but it has turned out to be so much more.
For those of you unaware, you poor souls, here is the standard episode summary:
MacGyver is an immortal. He travels the world, righting the wrongs of this planet. Often, he gets himself involved with some downtrodden victim of organized crime or corrupt members of societies elite. He becomes a part of their struggle often by means of a chance encounter, persuasion from outside forces of good such as the Police, the Phoenix Institute, or Momma (played by Della Reese), or a combination of the two. Now, MacGyver is placed in these situations where he has to protect the good guys, thwart the bad guys, cop a feel off of his most likely female sidekick, and save the world. Most of the time one of the people MacGyver is helping gets kidnapped by the bad guys somehow, and he must then get them back. This tends to be when things get a little complicated. Since MacGyver is immortal, he knows and can do anything and everything. MacGyver is not too keen on violence and death, so he uses elaborate boobie traps or weapons made from whatever he finds lying around to get the job done. In the end, he not only stops the villains, but usually stops someone from doing something they would have regretted. Invariably, MacGyver turns down the offer of rewards for his good deeds, and then proceeds to continue wondering the Earth, looking for injustices.
No matter the situation, MacGyver's industrious nature and knack for getting in and out of trouble never cease to amaze me. One of todays episodes starts off innocently as MacGyver is investigating the whereabouts of some stolen baseball cards in a local comic/card trading store. The owner turns out to be crooked, and a fight breaks out between him and a young woman who apparently is tired of the crooked inner workings of the local collectible industry. Outside the store, MacGyver resists an offer from the girl to help crack down on the counterfeit baseball card ring, run by gangsters. Then all of a sudden, big, fat, black, old Della Reese comes blasting around the corner, somehow being pulled by a bulldog about the size of her gargantuan head. She plays the character of a woman whom MacGyver calls Momma, who runs the foster home the baseball cards were stolen from. Later we learn that she has connections that give her access to virtually any information needed by MacGyver in the hunt for justice in a town where organized crime has its fingers in almost every pie, including baseball collectibles. So, despite his best efforts, old MacGyver ends up trying to bring down this corrupt system. We soon learn that the young girl helping MacGyver is not only a babe and an avid baseball memorabilia collector, but also the daughter of a famous baseball player. As it turns out, MacGyver once worked at the stadium where he played. As a result, MacGyver knows things about him that neither he or his daughter does, such as he always scratches his nose with the back of his hand before he steels second. Later we learn that this baseball player is under pressure from the gangsters to steel them an invaluable collection that only he can access. MacGyver goes to the crooked card shop in a brilliant disguise as the geeky son of a wealthy socialite, and pretends to have his heart set on the acquirement of some valuable cards he knows only the gangsters can get him. Using a rather devious scheme, he tricks the greedy store clerk into calling the gangsters. When they deny the order, MacGyver leaves. We then learn that MacGyver was recording all of this. He then figures out the phone number based on the tone the numbers made as the clerk dialed. Once this is figured out, he gets Momma to track down the address belonging to the number. Eventually, the girl ends up being kidnapped while she is trying to warn MacGyver about just who's house he is staking out. You see, she mistakes the sound of the dog that MacGyver tricked into a shed for MacGyver, and lets him out which then draws the attention of the bad guys. With the daughter kidnapped, the baseball player thinks he has no choice but to give in and steel the gangsters the memorabilia. When MacGyver discovers this, he stops him and convinces him to alert the police instead. For a time this works, but then he panics and drives off without MacGyver. Fortunately for MacGyver, he had already traded with the gangsters a signed softball so well faked that not even they could tell. Why did this work well for MacGyver you say? Because he had hidden a tracking device in the base of the baseball case. He then goes to the factory where he sees the girl, her father, and the gangsters. The baseball player had attempted to force the gangsters to give him back his daughter before the trade off of all the stolen goods, but they simply threatened to cut off his daughters hand for such an audacious action. He agrees to get them all of the goods, but as he does so sees MacGyver, who scratches his nose with the back of his hand. As he is being taken away by a gangster, MacGyver springs into action and the two of them beat up the gangster, out of view of the others. MacGyver then creates a distraction by turning on one of the machines, and attacking the gangster who comes to check it out. A scuffle ensues, and the lead gangster ends up driving away in the car with the stolen goods inside. The heroes race outside, and at first all looks hopeless. But then MacGyver sees something. "The sign" he yells to the baseball player. MacGyver then pitches the ball the baseball player was attempting to trade to him, and he hits it with the bat he was trying to trade. The ball hits its mark, a baseball stadium scoreboard that the factory had hanging above its entrance. The sign explodes, and crushes the car, stopping the getaway of the gangster. The stolen cards are returned to the young foster child they were stolen from. The child offers to pay what little money he has to the baseball player for an autograph, but he remarks "there are just some things you shouldn't put a price on," and signs the child's card free of charge.
The raw gangster nature of MacGyver himself is hard to put into words. He pulls of a mullet better than anyone I have ever seen. He also repeatedly makes this face, one that gives him a look of childish ignorance. If you've ever watched the Chris Issac show, it's the face that the character Ensign makes almost constantly, this sort of retardedly flabbergasted look of confusion. It acts as a counterbalance to his sheer brilliance. His on screen magnetism can be best summed up by the clip of him used for one of th transitional commercials between shows on Spike TV, where MacGyver can be seen fighting, what appears to be, a cobra. MacGyver did something special to me. It instilled in me a love for baseball I thought could only be achieved by strippers in baseball uniforms, Rookie of the Year, or something else related to that (NO ONE GETS IT BUT ME FUCK YOU). So when we look back at the 80s and wish we were dead for having lived during that period, let us not think of shit ass fads and stupid people like the pope. Let us instead think of great television shows like Magnum P.I., Quantum Leap, and of course, MacGyver.