(no subject)
i've had some really bizarre dreams the last 2 weeks or so...
i've always had bizarre dreams.
when i was very young i would have the most vivid surreal dreams that seemed and felt so REAL.
Nightmares.
Every cry and scream i could feel my little chest heaving and stuttering,
Darkness Itself Carrying Me Out The Kitchen Window past my unhearing Parents' Room through the bramble out back, up the Grassy Hill into The Cornfield, Wailing unheard...
To Be Murdered By My Parents.
Sacrificed.
Objects in your Bedroom Can Become Alive.
Carried Away by Amorphous, Sentient Darkness to The Woods.
i've seen terrible things before i could comprehend. things i cannot explain or describe.
things that my subconscious purposely erased from my memory for good.
and i believed them.
to me, these things HAPPENED.
i was so scared. scared to even sleep.
no movie can do this.
for at least 6 years of my life i would pray every night,
i would pray my own prayer until, over time it became a chant.
i prayed for at least 6-8 years out of 24 that i would not dream.
this is truth. people don't know this about me.
for a while to my knowledge, I DID NOT DREAM.
i'm not asking for sympathy. i'm stating facts.
at times, i'm kind of glad it happened.
i love my dreams...good or bad they are always WEIRD.
They Made ME Who I Am. Or Was.
I learned to embrace them.
My Dreams for the last few years have been fun, warm, bizarre movies that I'm the Star of;
Good or Bad.
This last 2 weeks I have been questioning my Sanity.
The REAL dreams have returned.
This week I verbally abused my brother, Michael, and then choked him out and bit a large, warm, bloody CHUNK out of his cheek.
I watched or pushed people dear to me in front of oncoming traffic.
And stared deeply into the smeared and mashed, hotdog-like flesh in the cracks of the tar.
I've watched and participated in things unnatural and alien to my character and BELIEVED them.
i've had some really bizarre dreams the last 2 weeks or so...
In other news, i saw George Clinton and The Parliament/Funkadelic with Jimmy, Walrus and his Lady, Abbra, Greg and some Steve character.
I spent about $90 on Crown Royal and Cokes.
It was weird returning to The Palladium.
George Clinton invited Abbra onstage...INSANE!!!
She was gettin' funky as hell and was grinded on by George Clinton and Sir Nose.
Imagine it: The StarChild and his mortal enemy, Sir Nose D'VoidofFunk brought together by our little, Abbra.
and i thought my dream life was bizarre.
i've always had bizarre dreams.
when i was very young i would have the most vivid surreal dreams that seemed and felt so REAL.
Nightmares.
Every cry and scream i could feel my little chest heaving and stuttering,
Darkness Itself Carrying Me Out The Kitchen Window past my unhearing Parents' Room through the bramble out back, up the Grassy Hill into The Cornfield, Wailing unheard...
To Be Murdered By My Parents.
Sacrificed.
Objects in your Bedroom Can Become Alive.
Carried Away by Amorphous, Sentient Darkness to The Woods.
i've seen terrible things before i could comprehend. things i cannot explain or describe.
things that my subconscious purposely erased from my memory for good.
and i believed them.
to me, these things HAPPENED.
i was so scared. scared to even sleep.
no movie can do this.
for at least 6 years of my life i would pray every night,
i would pray my own prayer until, over time it became a chant.
i prayed for at least 6-8 years out of 24 that i would not dream.
this is truth. people don't know this about me.
for a while to my knowledge, I DID NOT DREAM.
i'm not asking for sympathy. i'm stating facts.
at times, i'm kind of glad it happened.
i love my dreams...good or bad they are always WEIRD.
They Made ME Who I Am. Or Was.
I learned to embrace them.
My Dreams for the last few years have been fun, warm, bizarre movies that I'm the Star of;
Good or Bad.
This last 2 weeks I have been questioning my Sanity.
The REAL dreams have returned.
This week I verbally abused my brother, Michael, and then choked him out and bit a large, warm, bloody CHUNK out of his cheek.
I watched or pushed people dear to me in front of oncoming traffic.
And stared deeply into the smeared and mashed, hotdog-like flesh in the cracks of the tar.
I've watched and participated in things unnatural and alien to my character and BELIEVED them.
i've had some really bizarre dreams the last 2 weeks or so...
In other news, i saw George Clinton and The Parliament/Funkadelic with Jimmy, Walrus and his Lady, Abbra, Greg and some Steve character.
I spent about $90 on Crown Royal and Cokes.
It was weird returning to The Palladium.
George Clinton invited Abbra onstage...INSANE!!!
She was gettin' funky as hell and was grinded on by George Clinton and Sir Nose.
Imagine it: The StarChild and his mortal enemy, Sir Nose D'VoidofFunk brought together by our little, Abbra.
and i thought my dream life was bizarre.