so...
I officially turned twenty years old last Friday.... It feels weird. I keep feeling just, so terribly sad. I mean, is it just what being twenty does? I feel like I've never done anything, and yet I've lived for two decades. And that depresses and scares me.
I also feel so bad about myself creatively. I haven't really succeeded in drawing or writing anything overly creative in the past year. I'm so freaking upset, I don't even eat any more! All I do is just smoke cigs and drink coke, and listen to The Beach Boys. Those are the only energy sources I'm living off of these days. I'm being serious here, there's a fucking peanut butter and chocolate cake in my kitchen, and I haven't touched it.
But anyway, now I'm gonna try to do more with myself. Then maybe by next year, I'll be just fine with being twenty-one. I did manage to write lyrics to one song two days ago! I'm actually pretty happy with them too. So that's a looking-up factor.
I also feel so bad about myself creatively. I haven't really succeeded in drawing or writing anything overly creative in the past year. I'm so freaking upset, I don't even eat any more! All I do is just smoke cigs and drink coke, and listen to The Beach Boys. Those are the only energy sources I'm living off of these days. I'm being serious here, there's a fucking peanut butter and chocolate cake in my kitchen, and I haven't touched it.
But anyway, now I'm gonna try to do more with myself. Then maybe by next year, I'll be just fine with being twenty-one. I did manage to write lyrics to one song two days ago! I'm actually pretty happy with them too. So that's a looking-up factor.