(no subject)
I'm tired. Tired of being the subject of gossip at church. Why aren't adults being adults? Plus Ejay's mom doesn't like it when I lean on his shoulder. That's not going to get me pregnant. She keeps thinking we're going to have sex and I'm going to get pregnant. Hugging won't equal to sex. Kissing won't equal to sex. Leaning on someone's shoulder WILL MOST DEFINITELY NOT EQUAL TO SEX. We have no privacy at all anymore. They think we'll do something in a room. Um common now, at CHURCH?! Do they really think that LOW of us? I mean, I can understand about me 'cause I come of as rebellious to them sometimes but Ejay? Ejay's the nicest guy/kid ever at church. I'm so amazed that they think that way. So now both of us can't go anywhere even when we're with friends. So literally no kissing. Not even on the cheek. They think everything is going to lead to sex which drives me insane. I'm so tired of having to stop myself from doing what I want to do with Ejay. Hugging is bad, cuddling is bad, they think everything that has something to do with skinship is bad~ ! I'm tired of having to worry who's watching us. I'm tired of having to see Ejay sad that we can't just be normal us. Ejay and I can only be the REAL us when we're alone together or not being watched, why can't they understand? Why do they have no trust at all? I'm getting sick of everything. I wish that 9 years would already pass. Yes, I believe we will last that long---even longer. I have faith. Why give up? Even before we were going out, they were already watching us. For almost two whole years, well it is actually two whole years now. I'm ugh~ I want to be happy , I was so happy. I forget everything when Ejay's with me. Now Ejay's probably in Wisconsin by now for this club thing. A whole week without Ejay, I think I can survive somehow. I mean I did live without him for at least 11 years of my life. It's just unbearable to think he won't be in it. He has been in it for four years now. Well school will start this Wednesday for me, so I guess I'll be gone for awhile :( Sorry f-list :p I will have to step up a bit more this year :p Plus I'm thinking a healthier me [; LOL. I need to look good cause well I won't have PE after this year, and I don't want to let go of myself . I need to get use to it now XD ha. Well that's all for now<3 [: Love you all <3