Do you know this heart of mine?
i find it quite sad that jealousy slowly eats me up. i don't even know why i'm jealous. why should i be? it's not like me and the guy are still real friends anyways. i haven't felt like we have been for how many weeks now.what's worse is that i'm jealous of a friend of mine who met him after i did. plus it was basically me who introduced them >< how lame am i? and and and i can't even say hi to him in real life! he cant either. we're awkward with each other and it just makes me mad because if i had to count how many REAL guy friends i have. i only have three. ejay.marquis and clyde. i didn't even become their friend because i tried to! ejay through demee. marquis through marissa. clyde through marissa too. omgah~ i'm never ever gonna make my own guy friend *cries miserably.* i like almost everything about me except i'm NOT social, i'm NOT good in sports, and i don't really like my looks. [i guess it's okay but i wish i was really pretty. i feel insecure seeing other girls~ ] i like my personality but i'm scared that others will label me as someone weird that they can't take me. i've only met ONE person who says they don't mind my personality. this person told me i had no bad sides and that this person likes all of me. now how cute is that? why--- why can't i find more people like that? and this person isn't even someone who i thought of as a best friend when we first met. although i do love my best friends who i've known for a long time now--- i honestly can't say they like all of me. yes they can handle me but not LIKE all of me. then my mom is being so mean right now. blaming us for her failing the test. she didn't even do anything in the house but sleep and read and eat. how are we to blame? she's always taking out her anger on us. i'm sick of it. what is this??! ><
Hyukkie's birthday is like right now since it's probably April 4 in Korea.
so to the lovable jewel guy/dancing machine, HAPPY BIRTHDAY BB <3 (:
i'm sorry this dongsaeng fan of yours is being emo :[ i wish you happiness
at all times though<3 :D stay healthy too! don't stress yourself out ^^