Hop aboard the Bitter Bus...
Does anyone know what time it is? That's right! It's bitter rant time!
In case anyone doesn't know by now, I'm getting married in August. Now, This is a happy occation for me, and people are always saying "congratulations" and "I'm so happy for you", which is quite nice of them... or at least it would be if that is what they actually meant.
I've come to realize that "I'm so happy for you" means "I'm sure this will benefit me in some way".
Most people seem to think that this wedding is all about them. I've had people happy because it's going to be a big party, people who think that the wedding should be planned their way, and people who are just looking for their (or their child's) "role" in the wedding. I'm going to focus on the "role" part mostly.
Now, it is very difficult to choose who is going to be in the wedding party, and even who is going to be invited to the wedding. It is expensive to have a wedding... and it goes up for each person that you invite. So, not everyone that we'd like to invite will get to come to the wedding. People should know this and not take it personally if they're not invited. On the same note, asking "I'm invited to the wedding, right?" is not very considerate. There is already an immense load of guilt on anyone who is planning a wedding because not everyone can have their way. Adding extra guilt by asking questions like this or complaining about not being in the wedding party is just selfish. Most people only get married once and so it would be nice to let them enjoy their day (and the few events that lead up to it).
In summary, a wedding should be about the two people getting married! Stop worrying about yourself because, chances are, the couple are already worrying about your feelings. It would be nice to just help them celebrate. Instead of saying "I'm happy for you", try actually meaning it!
Now, I know that this might seem hypocritical because some might say that I'm being selfish. But, the way I see it, I'm only going to do this once, so I don't think that it's such a bad thing to be selfish when it comes to my wedding.
In case anyone doesn't know by now, I'm getting married in August. Now, This is a happy occation for me, and people are always saying "congratulations" and "I'm so happy for you", which is quite nice of them... or at least it would be if that is what they actually meant.
I've come to realize that "I'm so happy for you" means "I'm sure this will benefit me in some way".
Most people seem to think that this wedding is all about them. I've had people happy because it's going to be a big party, people who think that the wedding should be planned their way, and people who are just looking for their (or their child's) "role" in the wedding. I'm going to focus on the "role" part mostly.
Now, it is very difficult to choose who is going to be in the wedding party, and even who is going to be invited to the wedding. It is expensive to have a wedding... and it goes up for each person that you invite. So, not everyone that we'd like to invite will get to come to the wedding. People should know this and not take it personally if they're not invited. On the same note, asking "I'm invited to the wedding, right?" is not very considerate. There is already an immense load of guilt on anyone who is planning a wedding because not everyone can have their way. Adding extra guilt by asking questions like this or complaining about not being in the wedding party is just selfish. Most people only get married once and so it would be nice to let them enjoy their day (and the few events that lead up to it).
In summary, a wedding should be about the two people getting married! Stop worrying about yourself because, chances are, the couple are already worrying about your feelings. It would be nice to just help them celebrate. Instead of saying "I'm happy for you", try actually meaning it!
Now, I know that this might seem hypocritical because some might say that I'm being selfish. But, the way I see it, I'm only going to do this once, so I don't think that it's such a bad thing to be selfish when it comes to my wedding.