(no subject)
---QUOTE---
You have given me more affection that anyone else has...
I really enjoy your affections and enjoy spending time with you...
I have had interest in you for a while now and kinda regretted never getting a chance to be with you...
I do have some feelings for you...
I think it's pretty much a guarantee that we'll be dating soon...
I want you...
I'm sorry I'm so late (as he comes home drunk, 5 hours too late to go on a pre-planned date)...
My mom thinks you're too prissy and I agree (meaning too femmy). People like that really bother me. (as in I guess who I am, my personality, really bothers him). I can only handle that in small doses. Oh, and I don't like you or have any feelings for you after all...
Yes, you can come down and sleep with me, and have a date tomorrow...
Go sleep on the couch...
I am trying to be nice and be free and willing to go on the date or whatever with you... (Um, "Charity case?")
--- END-QUOTE---
After 8 years of often one thing being said and another done, one thing being planned and another happening, one thing being hoped for, and almost always being very disappointed, and with it culminating in this... What am I supposed to think of this person?
|EDIT|
*sigh*
I don't know. Maybe I just expected too much, maybe he just isn't good enough for me as he and others have claimed. Frankly I don't know whether to blame it all on him, or to blame me for being gullible enough to actually go along with this. Really, all I wanted was just one last time to hold him close and snuggle up to him for the night, and one last date, just so I could feel I finally had one. And true, I could have had one and it was I who decided not to go along with it, but in a way I'm glad. Date is something people do to see if a relationship might be possible. What I was going to have was "lunch," and at most a pitty date. I wasn't going to lower myself to that. Either way, although, once again what I planned didn't happen (as it never did before), I guess the end result is the same, that being that this was all last. And in a way, maybe the circumstances of what happened will make it easier for me to finally actually end it. Whether I am actually completely over him yet or not is I guess for time to decide, but as things are going now (and have been for the last month without any change), I'm thinking - hoping - that maybe finally I'll be... I guess "free" is the word.
Peeved, annoyed, dissapointed, happy, and glad. It's weird how opposing feelings can exist at the same time sometimes.
You have given me more affection that anyone else has...
I really enjoy your affections and enjoy spending time with you...
I have had interest in you for a while now and kinda regretted never getting a chance to be with you...
I do have some feelings for you...
I think it's pretty much a guarantee that we'll be dating soon...
I want you...
I'm sorry I'm so late (as he comes home drunk, 5 hours too late to go on a pre-planned date)...
My mom thinks you're too prissy and I agree (meaning too femmy). People like that really bother me. (as in I guess who I am, my personality, really bothers him). I can only handle that in small doses. Oh, and I don't like you or have any feelings for you after all...
Yes, you can come down and sleep with me, and have a date tomorrow...
Go sleep on the couch...
I am trying to be nice and be free and willing to go on the date or whatever with you... (Um, "Charity case?")
--- END-QUOTE---
After 8 years of often one thing being said and another done, one thing being planned and another happening, one thing being hoped for, and almost always being very disappointed, and with it culminating in this... What am I supposed to think of this person?
|EDIT|
*sigh*
I don't know. Maybe I just expected too much, maybe he just isn't good enough for me as he and others have claimed. Frankly I don't know whether to blame it all on him, or to blame me for being gullible enough to actually go along with this. Really, all I wanted was just one last time to hold him close and snuggle up to him for the night, and one last date, just so I could feel I finally had one. And true, I could have had one and it was I who decided not to go along with it, but in a way I'm glad. Date is something people do to see if a relationship might be possible. What I was going to have was "lunch," and at most a pitty date. I wasn't going to lower myself to that. Either way, although, once again what I planned didn't happen (as it never did before), I guess the end result is the same, that being that this was all last. And in a way, maybe the circumstances of what happened will make it easier for me to finally actually end it. Whether I am actually completely over him yet or not is I guess for time to decide, but as things are going now (and have been for the last month without any change), I'm thinking - hoping - that maybe finally I'll be... I guess "free" is the word.
Peeved, annoyed, dissapointed, happy, and glad. It's weird how opposing feelings can exist at the same time sometimes.