so incredibly stupid of me
so i've been very incredibly stupid today, and i hate myself for it, i wanted to pain inside to go away and it won't my arm hurts and so does my leg and my hand, hitting and punching and throwing things is not very smart. i hate chris i've decided that. i hate with an ever living passion that is more intense than it was when i loved him, which sadly part of me still does or else i wouldnt hate him so much. but he's a lying coward and i hate him cause he fucking cryed to make me not hate him, and now he's treating me as if i dont exist, and i hate him for it. but i got my tongue pierced i almost quit my job last night, i've been considering moving to state college, i've been here a year and i'm getting quite sick of it. if i dont get this apartment that's probably what i will end up doing is moving back to the area and there for hating life except for a few people and be ever so unhappy again. i hate life and it sucks balls. and the sad part is i'm not suicidal i'm more homicidal which really isnt a good thing for the rest of humanity or myself. and i hate being sick and having allergies.