Author:
fangqueenRecipient:
rzzmg Title: Patience
Pairing: Blaise/Draco
Request/Prompt: Pair options (pick one): Theo or Blaise/Draco, or Harry or Ron/Neville - They get a flat together. One night, both of them have cancelled dates & decide to get drunk together. One is either gay or bi-sexual. The other is hetero. A frank conversation, sharing secrets, and maybe a little curiosity, too (you decide) ensue. Would love a next morning hangover & how to deal with the confessions made the night before, too.
Rating: R
Word Count: 1025
Summary: It was clear he was trying to pretend this was any other morning, but the tension hovering between them also made it clear that it was anything but.
A/N: To my prompter: Some angst, for your viewing pleasure. I fear I’m terrible at these gift things because I constantly worry that I’m not writing exactly what the person wanted, haha. But these two are my babies, and I just had to. So I hope this was what you were looking for and that you enjoy it! ^__^
When the sun decided to grace his room with its dazzling presence, all Blaise could manage to do was curse and contemplate the pros and cons of choosing to hex himself into oblivion, instead of facing this day. He felt like he’d been trampled repeatedly by an entire herd of centaurs, then simultaneously fucked by a horntail, a dementor, and a very enthusiastic troll. And it wasn’t just physical, either…
Still swearing under his breath, he eventually convinced his legs to carry him to the corner where he’d discarded his pajamas and slipped back into them. From the sounds coming from the kitchen, it seemed his roommate was up as well. Before he’d finally fallen asleep a mere couple hours ago, he’d spent a great deal of time stealing himself for this conversation, which he knew needed to happen soon, before they let it linger and stew for longer than it already had.
Upon opening his bedroom door, his first glimpse from across the living room was of Draco’s hunched back as he stirred cream into a mug, and he didn’t look any better off than Blaise felt. He looked like hell, actually. Worse than. The evidence as to why still littered the coffee table between them. Well, part of the evidence, anyway. Hearing the click of the latch, the other Slytherin glanced over momentarily. His hair was uncharacteristically disheveled, and his eyes were bloodshot. The closer the darker man got to him, the more he could tell that it wasn’t just because he was hungover.
“Hey,” he greeted Blaise. It was clear he was trying to pretend this was any other morning, but the tension hovering between them also made it clear that it was anything but.
He said nothing in return, not positive that he could get his mouth to work properly if he did. It was breaking him to see his best friend like this, knowing that he was the cause. In fact, after what Draco had confessed to him the previous night, he suspected he’d been the cause a lot more than he’d ever realized. Of course, he’d known the blonde liked men, he just didn’t know he liked…
“Dray. Look at me.” When he still wouldn’t, he pressed further: “We need to talk.” He was awful at these things, but he knew he owed it to him.
Draco looked then, actually fully turned around and looked at him. His expression said he wanted to tell him to sod off. Blaise wouldn’t have blamed him if he had; after all, the last time they’d talked had ended in him shoving Draco off of him and sprinting into his room to hide like a coward. But no, the blonde responded rather calmly, considering: “We don’t need to talk about it. Just forget it.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t do that.”
“...I’m sorry, too. I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
“And I shouldn’t have let you suck me off, either.” He could physically see Draco’s heart sink in that moment. Goddamnit, he was shite at these things.
“Well...we both made mistakes. I mean, I know you’re not...and I did anyway...”
“Yeah…” He knew he should’ve said more than that, but he’d stopped trusting his mouth again.
Draco’s nostrils flared. His jaw opened, then shut just as quickly, as if he’d thought better of it. With a measured sigh, he said, “Great. Wonderful. Feel better now? I’m gonna shower.”
As he rushed past him, Blaise could see the tears welling in his swollen eyes. No, he couldn’t let this happen, not anymore. He’d set out with different intentions when he’d chosen to get up a few minutes ago, and he wasn’t about to waste what little chance he had left.
“Get changed, too.”
Draco paused halfway to his room and turned back with a raised eyebrow. “Why?”
“I’m taking you to breakfast.”
The confusion on his counterpart’s face was apparent. Now that Blaise had seen what he hadn’t before (and should have, because it was almost painful now to realize how obvious it had been), he couldn’t unsee it. And although he wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing, or even how he really felt about it, he knew he couldn’t allow his ridiculous fears and insecurities about it to hurt the only true friend he’d ever really had. He couldn’t see that look in his eyes again. And last night had also shown him just how many emotions he’d been avoiding himself...He hadn’t reciprocated at the time. He still didn’t know if he could do that just yet, but taking him on a date on this otherwise pleasant spring morning, rather than forcing Draco to cook when he was clearly feeling so shitty, was the next best thing, in his opinion.
“I shouldn’t have let those things happen. But I did. And I think that must mean something.”
“Blaise, really, it’s ok--”
“No, it’s not. You deserve better than that. You deserve me being honest with myself.” Shit, his voice was cracking. He hadn’t meant to get choked up about this. Actually, it wasn’t something that happened to him very often, and he was kind of freaking out over how to deal with it. Sensing his dilemma, the blonde’s demeanor softened significantly, and he padded back towards him, cautiously reaching out to him. Although last night had been on another level entirely, they’d never had trouble with affection before, and Blaise wasn’t about to make the man afraid of it now: he reached in return and clasped his hand in his, taking note of how his own wasn’t the only one that was trembling. “Look, I know it’s a lot for me to ask, and if you don’t want to...I don’t know, be a part of this, I totally understand. I’m just gonna need some time, okay?”
Draco bit his bottom lip to stop it from quivering. “You don’t have to do--”
“I want to.” Then, more forcefully: “I want to. I’m just new to this, you know? But I’m willing to try...if you’ll try with me.”
A rare smile began to light up his friend’s face, and he squeezed his hand and nodded.