(no subject)
Okay. First entry. I am due to begin a new paper journal today, but I don't want to begin it with this crap.
I had a slight binge this morning for "bfast"--I started with two bowls of Frosted Mini Wheats (which was my roomate's cereal, so I am going to have to replace it. Bah.) Then I decided to cut myself off I'd have an english muffin with pb. Nope, not ready. I proceeded to make Amy's Pizza bites, or whatever the hell they are called. Dessert was a fudge pop. That is bfast, lunch and dinner right there! Ahh! I have therapy today, so I am going to have to do a lot more exercise than I originally anticipated. I can't leave all that shit in my stomach. It is 10am now. I have 5 hours. Of course, right now I am depressed, overly full and bloated. Not to mention craving some licorice--cause why the fuck not? I've gone this far, right? Meh. It'd just be more to burn off. So, let's calculate--cereal was about 500. Eng muffin--300. Pizza bites--400. I think. That'd make up for whatever I am forgetting. So, I am already at 1200. Sweet!! I'm going to have to go to the gym, do eliptical for an hour. Then spin. Then run. (?) I'd much rather lay here and feel sorry for myself, then beat myself up for being such a greedy ass punk. The food coma is beginning to kick in. I'm not going to puke, though. When I first began eating I thought--Oh, I can just puke this up. No problemo. But, as the pizza bites were being nuked, I told myself no puke for me. This is the only way i will be able to stop the cycle. Right. Damn, I want licorice. Anyway....
I should now get ready. The daily to-do:
Pack gym bag
Get dressed
Do dishes
Let S. out
Go to gym
Work ass off.
Pick up a box of Frosted Mini's on the way home
Contemplate running.
Shower.
Dress
Therapy by 3:30.
Ooh, fun times!
I had a slight binge this morning for "bfast"--I started with two bowls of Frosted Mini Wheats (which was my roomate's cereal, so I am going to have to replace it. Bah.) Then I decided to cut myself off I'd have an english muffin with pb. Nope, not ready. I proceeded to make Amy's Pizza bites, or whatever the hell they are called. Dessert was a fudge pop. That is bfast, lunch and dinner right there! Ahh! I have therapy today, so I am going to have to do a lot more exercise than I originally anticipated. I can't leave all that shit in my stomach. It is 10am now. I have 5 hours. Of course, right now I am depressed, overly full and bloated. Not to mention craving some licorice--cause why the fuck not? I've gone this far, right? Meh. It'd just be more to burn off. So, let's calculate--cereal was about 500. Eng muffin--300. Pizza bites--400. I think. That'd make up for whatever I am forgetting. So, I am already at 1200. Sweet!! I'm going to have to go to the gym, do eliptical for an hour. Then spin. Then run. (?) I'd much rather lay here and feel sorry for myself, then beat myself up for being such a greedy ass punk. The food coma is beginning to kick in. I'm not going to puke, though. When I first began eating I thought--Oh, I can just puke this up. No problemo. But, as the pizza bites were being nuked, I told myself no puke for me. This is the only way i will be able to stop the cycle. Right. Damn, I want licorice. Anyway....
I should now get ready. The daily to-do:
Pack gym bag
Get dressed
Do dishes
Let S. out
Go to gym
Work ass off.
Pick up a box of Frosted Mini's on the way home
Contemplate running.
Shower.
Dress
Therapy by 3:30.
Ooh, fun times!