it's all in my head, right?

[ranua]

Work is giving me stress and is sucks. My anxiety makes a churning ball of nausea in my stomach. I hate it. It's a formless stress too. The nebulous fear of not knowing the answer to a question combined with the fear of angry customers

Comments

[dodger_sister]

Ugh, your work sounds like suck. My only advice - because you can't logic away the anxiety that comes with that bullshit - is try not to take it home. Whatever happened that day at work, leave it there, if you can. The stupid phone and angry customers don't need to travel home with you!

Go you on the working out and the diet stuff!! That is no small feat! I have had to keep a food journal this week bc I go see a dietician on Tuesday and I am now suddenly realizing how bad my diet actually is. They better not try to take my Nutella away from me!!

In Criminal Minds stuff - Yay, you are watching CM! I watched the first six seasons and then stopped, but have been considering catching up on netflix. Reid is my boy, which is weird, cuz knowing my type, you'd think it'd be Morgan, but I guess when I look at a lot of my fav guys, they are all kind of nerds. But Morgan, Garcia and Prentiss all fall in at second place, cuz I can't pick a second favorite, cuz I love them all. Garcia not at first, cuz she was maybe too wacky in the first season, but oh shit yeah, she grew on me. My sister has a big huge crush on Morgan and I am required to call her into the room when he is running or kicking in a door or whatever. I have a big huge crush on Prentiss. In case you ever wondered my type in chicks, it would be Faith from Buffy and Prentiss from Criminal Minds, for starters!

Also, I have always meant to write a meta about Garcia and Morgan's relationship and the idea of the 'fat' girl getting the hot guy (you never see this on tv) and the 'guy and girls can just be friends without it being about sex' argument plus the interracial thing (still not seen on TV that much) and the whole 'but why shouldn't they get together just because they aren't your typically expected relationship?' (even though when Nicky Brendan is on as Garcia's love interest I adored them together and wanted them to get married!). But yeah, I have a lot of feelings about all that and only haven't ever written it all up because I know it will just devolve into an all caps version of 'GUYS AND GIRLS ARE ALLOWED TO JUST BE FRIENDS OMG BUT WHEN ARE THEY ARE GOING TO GET IT ON.!?!?!!'. Lol. Oddly enough though, the fav CM fic of mine is Garcia/Reid. I even got non-CM peeps to read it and quite literally cream themselves, lol, tmi.

Anyways, I thought I just had like one fic rec for you, but I found four! Here you go:

Echo, this is a wonderful 2k-ish piece of hurt!Reid and Reid n Morgan friendship fic, where Reid goes mute and is lost without his stream of words to get his brain's inner workings across. It has mega spoilers though so if you don't want spoilers (spellcheck just tried to turn 'spoilers' into 'spiders', lol) maybe wait until you've gotten to the episodes with James Vanderbeek as the unsub, season 2 sometime.

Silent as A Smile, is a Hotch/Garcia fic, set after her two part episode run in season three, so again, spoilers for canon here. I just did a quick glance over it again and what struck me about this is seeing the casual side of Hotch, a smile even. I love casual!Hotch, in the rare glimpses we get in the show and Garcia's POV here basically sums up how I feel during these rare moments.

Strange Attractors, is not only my all time favorite Criminal Minds fic, but one of my all time favorite fics ever, any fandom. I've reread this so many times. Garcia/Reid, set during canon run from like season one to the middle of season two - (up through Anton Yelchin's episode) - but runs parallel to canon, like interweaves. Virginal!Reid tries out some kissing with Garcia and then some other stuff too, maybe even a little relationship to boot. 9k-ish. Sweet, sexy, simple. Perfect.

Redux, my sister's own CM/SPN fic, set after the end of SPN season one, mostly with Sam and Hotchner. Well written, subtle, soft and raw at once, and will fuck with your mind ever so slightly.

Well, this comment has taken like two hours, but mostly cuz I had to re-read these fics again! A trip down fandom-feel lane!

[ranua]

thank you for the recs bb. I've checked out a couple of them and loved them. I plan on getting to the others at some point cos I totally trust your taste in fic and know you wouldn't steer me wrong.

I totally buy your meta about Garcia and Morgan being bffs that turn into bffs with more. I'm in season 4 now and I swear their chemistry has only gotten better. I don't usually ship het, but I totally ship them now. Every time he calls her baby girl or some variant I'm all 'see! they're meant to be!'

the work stress has dropped off for the most part, thank the little gods. Work will never not be stressful, but I can learn to ignore and leave it there