Sans Syndicated Simpsons
I don't watch a ton of television these days, but for the past five years, I've managed to watch a ton of The Simpsons. When we lived in Alameda, the local UPN affiliate aired three or even four episodes every weeknight, new episodes on Sundays, and Treehouse of Horror marathons every Halloween. Here in Arcata, the local FOX affiliate has managed two episodes every weeknight, despite ceaseless shuffling of its otherwise shitty syndicated programming, and they repeated episodes less often than UPN did. I could look forward to relaxing with Homer and company after physically-draining days at work and soul-draining days at fucking school, seeing every joke coming from a mile away and still laughing like I hadn't seen it a billion times, and you bet your sweet ass I looked forward to some Simpsons when I got back from my latest Wisconsin Death Trip.
I got Scrubs. Intelligent situation comedy? Yes, but the resemblance ends there - I wanted my cultural icon, I wanted to feel powerful because I knew the future of the episode, I wanted to feel that rush that - just maybe, it has happened - they'd show an old episode I happened to miss, and most importantly, I just wanted to watch my fucking Simpsons after a trying day with the still-sick, growth-spurting Boy, and I get fucking Scrubs?!
Just how high did they get over there at the station? You know you'll get thousands of idiots like me in any market that will watch those same stupid Simpsons episodes at the same times every night, year after year, watching the same stupid commercials that pay the bills, and now they've turned me into one of those "kill your television" people - or at least a "kill your local FUX affiliate" person. Believe me, they will hear of this, but you heard it here first.
Maybe it will do me some good in the long run, but this cold-turkey, no-warning shit pisses me off. I want my Simpsons, you motherfuckers.
I got Scrubs. Intelligent situation comedy? Yes, but the resemblance ends there - I wanted my cultural icon, I wanted to feel powerful because I knew the future of the episode, I wanted to feel that rush that - just maybe, it has happened - they'd show an old episode I happened to miss, and most importantly, I just wanted to watch my fucking Simpsons after a trying day with the still-sick, growth-spurting Boy, and I get fucking Scrubs?!
Just how high did they get over there at the station? You know you'll get thousands of idiots like me in any market that will watch those same stupid Simpsons episodes at the same times every night, year after year, watching the same stupid commercials that pay the bills, and now they've turned me into one of those "kill your television" people - or at least a "kill your local FUX affiliate" person. Believe me, they will hear of this, but you heard it here first.
Maybe it will do me some good in the long run, but this cold-turkey, no-warning shit pisses me off. I want my Simpsons, you motherfuckers.