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Feb 03, 2005 23:24

Well, it's almost 1:30 in the morning and I can't sleep. I can't stop thinking about what's going on in my life. Everything seems to be going down hill and I'm trying my hardest to stop it. I almost ruined things with Ashley tonight. She trusted me with something and I blew it. I had my reasons but there was a misunderstanding which probably could have prevented everything. I just hope she can trust me again. I'm behind on all of my homework this semester because I just don't feel like doing anything anymore except getting away. Things have been rocky at home for the past month or so with my mom's back problems and my step dad looking for another job. I ended up getting in a fight with my mom the other night and ended up taking off and was out for 4 hours in the cold on foot. I just needed to blow off some steam. I've decided to get God back into my life because I feel lost and He can get me back on track. I'm going to start going to a church group on Sunday nights at Grace in Kenosha. Hopefully I can get back in the swing of things and be myself again..............On a lighter note, I've been going to the club Jungle in Milwaukee lately. It's really a great time dancing with a bunch of people and listening to music. It gets pretty hot in there in more than one way *wink wink*. I first went up there the night of New Year's with my friends Destiny, Ashley, Jessica, Carrie, and Missy (yea i know.....5 girls). I was nervous at first but I ended up dancing the night away with Ashley. She's a really great girl and I hate what she has been going through. I just wish I could help her. I just want to help her forget but I keep screwing things up. She's a great girl and just doesn't realize it at this point, but I hope she can someday soon because I want to get to know her more.....what she's all about because she's been hiding herself. Anyways.......that was suppose to be a lighter note and it was only one for like a sentence, but saturday night, I'm going up to club Jungle again with Shane, Mike, Jess, Shane, and prolly JB. We are doing this instead of our formal because it's way more fun because we can actualy dance, but I don't know where we are going to eat yet...........Well, I'm kinda sleepy now so I'm going to try to go to bed again. Night everyone, Adam
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