Metal Detectors
I saw an ad today for metal detectors. The non-stop fun and enjoyment was heavily touted as reason to get a metal detector, in addition to the massive quantities of treasure you'd discover. They showed a family of four on the beach and each person had their own metal detector. I couldn't help but wonder if there was any family in the entire U.S. that owned more than one metal detector for recreational purposes. If you lost your wedding ring in the yard...I can see why you might get one of these but are people really just searching for random bits of metal? Where do people buy metal detectors, anyway? Like, if you didn't want to wait until you spotted a television ad? I don't think I've ever seen one at a store.
Okay, I just checked Amazon. First reviewer. The guy said he wanted to find "coins, rings, and Civil War relics". He found "beer cans, shotgun shells, nail." FIVE STARS.
I love another review by a guy who pretty much has to be a grumpy old man: "And lastly a warning. If you go into a park, or any area attended by kids, you will be spotted. Within a short amount of time you will be surrounded by kids "helping you" to dig up buried treasure. At that point you have to decide whether to be a meanie and bark at them, or write the rest of the hunt off and let them shred the area every time the detector beeps. I generally tell them how it's been a long day and "see ya" since they will invariably have their hands in there digging away no matter what you say... "
Blasted kids.
Apparently, this metal detecting is some serious stuff. Hmm, it makes different noises based upon the metal. Another guy said he has found $3,000 in coins so far.
Get a load of this review:
I collect rare bottle caps, and try to take care not to lose any of my collection. I was coming back from a convention recently and one of my collection boxes hopped out of the back of the pickup as I was crossing an old hump-back bridge, and fell into a small stream.
So I bought the metal detector to try to get my valuable collection back. This one said it is waterproof so I figured it might do the job.
Well, after three weeks of wading up and down the stream I have had mixed fortunes. A Celtic chalice, the silver cumtach (cover) from a medieval bible, two viking swords, a couple of daggers, a mound of celtic, roman and viking coins, an array of viking hacksilver, medieval broches and buckes from shoes and belts, delicately filigreed celtic gold jewellry and most notable of all (since the Romans never made it to Ireland) the metal fittings from eight complete and six incomplete sets of roman imperial legionnary armour.
OK, so I am famous now amongst scholars of the Romano-Celtic world. I have been awarded three honorary doctorate degrees for my finds, and I have been given freedom of the cities of Dublin and York, and I had to decline a Royal knighthood offered by the English Queen (I do have principles and I am an Irish Republican). But what is all this fame? I have lost a box of 200 bottle caps and not found a single one with the detector.
*blink*
Okay, I want one.